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I gave Alison a questioning look. She finished off her margarita, waved at Tomas, the server, that she wanted another, pointed at my beer and then turned to look at me. “You always keep her at a distance. You are friends, you have always been close, but you keep her at arm’s length.”
“We talk all the time. We have dinner a few times a year. I come to her events at school when she invites me.”
“She invites the whole family and you come with us. You’ve never allowed her to see you as anything more than a dear friend and stepbrother. She hasn’t allowed herself to think of the possibility because you keep the idea from forming in her head.”
“Are you saying I can control her thoughts? Interesting.”
“I’m saying if you don’t give her any vibe or indication that you’re interested in her, she’s never going to think that you are. Especially when you bone every other woman you know but her. If you want a chance with her, then you need to make a move. What better place and time than now?”
“I shouldn’t bug her on her vacation,” I said.
“If I were her and I had a chance to have sex with a man who was in love with me and, please don’t take this the wrong way, is probably very good in bed, I would do it. I think she would too.”
She isn’t just a fling. I wouldn’t want that.”
“Nor would she.”
“Then there’s no point in continuing this discussion. I’m not looking for casual, I won’t do casual with her. We can’t be anything so why even start it.”
“Why can’t you be something more?”
I tilted my head and looked at Alison like she was stupid. She isn’t stupid.
“Yes, your parents are married, but that didn’t happen until you were both in college. We might have known her for years but you never lived together or anything like that.”
“I know but Dad and Dawn would have a field day. Sydney is the golden child; they wouldn’t want her with me.”
“Because you’ve been a bit of a playboy? Because you’ve made a reputation for being a bit of an office slut? That’s only because you couldn’t have the one woman you wanted. You said it yourself, you don’t want to do casual with her, so you won’t.”
“She sees me as her friend, as her stepbrother. Nothing more. And isn’t she with Harrison?”
“That trust fund asshole? No, she dumped him about a month ago. I thought you’d heard. It’s why he isn’t here and she looks so amazing in her bathing suit. She has been posting how great she looks on social media since she got here.”
“I saw,” I muttered.
“You saw how good she looked or that she has been posting? Never mind. I know the answer. You noticed she looked hot, also a way of telling me that you’re into her.”
“Didn’t we already establish that?” I asked.
“We have, the question is, what are you going to do about it? You aren’t getting any younger and neither is she. She’s going to want to settle down, have kids, possibly travel before she does both. If you don’t tell her how you feel she’s going to find someone else and you’ll lose her forever.”
“We will always be friends and quasi-related,” I said
“Not the same thing and not what you want. You were top in your class in medical school. You’ve always gone after what you wanted with a ruthlessness that was borderline scary. Why aren’t you doing it with her?” Alison asked and playfully hit my shoulder.
“Everything I’ve ever gone for I knew I could obtain,” I admitted, more to myself than Alison.
I looked out over the pool and to Sydney when I spoke. She was laughing again with the woman and my body reacted again at seeing her looking so sexy and happy. There was no other woman that I had ever wanted as much as Sydney and I knew she was the one woman I could never have.
“Ah, there's the rub. You don’t think you would win her. You don’t want to try and then fail. You’ve never failed at anything so you don’t want to start now.”
“It could ruin everything.”
“Or it could be the start of something great. Did you ever consider that?”
“No,” I stated simply and Alison laughed.
“Maybe you should. I’ve seen her looking at you when you aren’t looking at her. There’s a look in her eyes. There’s something there, if you just allowed yourself to see it. She might think she isn’t good enough for you. Since you’ve never so much as flirted with her in all the years you have known her, she’s probably clueless.”
