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I’m annoyed by the conversation going on in my head. But it’s convinced me that I really do need to be realistic. What started with cock-drunk will most likely quickly devolve into career-destroying total humiliation.
And I need to think about Ace too. He has so much to worry about right now. He even said I’m a distraction. What he needs to be doing is concentrating on his business. I don’t want to be the iceberg to his own personal Titanic.
We have to put some distance between us.
He can’t keep ignoring his company. And I can’t throw away an opportunity of a lifetime because there’s a handsome man with an impressive (and amazingly perfect and also enormous) dick who wants to keep fucking me.
Very carefully, I ease myself out from under his arm. Exactly like I did once before, all those months ago in Waikiki.
I tiptoe around, finding my clothes and my bag. I check my phone. The time is 4:17 a.m.
Searching for a pen and a piece of paper, I find one. It’s the little pad from his hotel room in Hawaii. I’m touched by this. He kept it, just like I did.
Ace,
I wish I could stay here with you, I really do. But we need to be honest with ourselves. I work for you. As much as we both don’t want that to matter, it does. I loved our weekend together. A lot. But I need some time to figure out how to deal with all this. Please don’t make this any harder than it already is. I’m so sorry.
xx,
Tex
On top of the pad of paper, I leave the bracelet. The suede coat is still in the kitchen. I won’t be taking that either.
Very quietly, I let myself out of his apartment.
Back on the street, a cab pulls over and I climb in. Tears blur my vision. I fumble around in my bag to find my compact and the key card to my apartment and realize…shit. It’s not here. All I can find is the key card for work. My brain does a rewind to where I might have left my apartment key and my stomach sinks. It’s still on my desk at the office.
“Excuse me,” I say to the driver, “can we take a detour?”
It’s 4:42 a.m. when I get to the office. I have my pass around my neck, and with the staff gym and pool being open 24/7, I know I’ll be able to get into the building, but I have no idea about the office itself.
The thought of running into any of my new colleagues is somehow worse than the thought of the office being locked. They could probably guess, just by looking at me, what I’ve been doing all weekend. I need to go home, take a long shower and get into some clothes that aren’t the same outfit I was wearing on Friday.
Thankfully, my key card works.
The office is quiet. Only a few lights are on, and the neon signs of motivational quotes that are dotted around the large space.
It always seems impossible until it’s done. I think that one was Nelson Mandela. Thanks, Nelson. I needed that right now.
If everyone is moving forward together, then success takes care of itself. That one was Henry Ford, if I’m not mistaken.
A diamond is a piece of coal that stuck to the job. I can’t place that one. But it reminds me of a certain diamond bracelet I left behind.
It reminds me of how hard things have been in my life. And how much I want to be able to buy my own diamonds. And rely on myself to get where I need to go. Like I always have. It reinforces my resolve: I can’t throw away my career, I just can’t.
I’m relieved to find that the place is empty.
I get to my desk and there, next to my abandoned coffee mug, is my key.
Thank fuck for that.
I grab it and quickly make my way back toward the foyer, when something catches my eye. Movement. In one of the communal work zone spaces. They’re glass offices where people can work alone or in small groups. They’re soundproof and are designed to allow people to remove the noise distractions of the busy office while still being a part of it.
Someone is in there. The lights are off, but the desktop computer is on, glowing brightly in the early morning light.
Which seems weird. Who would be working at 4:30 a.m.? I mean, we’re all on the Type A spectrum around here but this is ridiculous.
Her back is to me but I recognize her hair. Of course I do. There’s only one woman with blond hair so long and straight it’s like a trademark.
