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I was, but Carissa was dead. She once saved me, and now she is dead. I sobbed, unable to stop. The dragons and the wizards would be dead soon, I was sure of it. But I hadn’t been fast enough or clear enough, because it had been able to turn and get Carissa. She was gone and that was on me.
Maybe I said it aloud, because Oliver kissed my cheek. “No, it’s not. They fucked up. This is not on you. It’s over.”
Charlie rubbed my back. “It’s done.”
They had to understand what I did. “They used my vision. They knew somehow what I saw, and then they waited, knowing we couldn’t see the second part because we were in Hawkseye.”
Truett nodded. “I know. We’ll talk about it soon. We just need you to be okay first. Be okay, beautiful, and then we’ll figure it out together.”
“Something is wrong. This isn’t just killing monsters.” I was going to black out. I had to tell them first. “There is some kind of offering.”
That was the last thing I could say. Darkness took me.
Chapter Twelve
Iwoke up in a tent and wondered for a moment if I had imagined all of it. Maybe I still traveled to the ritual, and I just had some kind of fever dream. But the ache in my head told me otherwise. That and the fact that Oliver had his hand on my back as he sat staring into the night through the open flap.
“Why are we here?” I whispered.
He rubbed my back. “Does your throat hurt? Here, let me get you some water.” He bent over and grabbed a thermos. He poured what looked like water into a glass for me. I sipped it as he continued talking. “We’re in this tent because we can’t take you back to Hawkseye and risk blinding you to your visions again. I don’t know how you had the sense to run like hell for the border, but we’re all glad that you did.”
I was too late for Carissa. I closed my eyes and pressed my forehead against my knees. I doubt she was thrilled about my vision and how fast I got it.
“Now, now. None of that.” He tugged me against him. “You didn’t fail her. Her guys did. They’re gone now.”
I lifted my head. “Gone where?”
“Somewhere to lick their wounds, I would imagine. It’s not okay to lose our wives. Trust me, we know.” He kissed the top of my head. “I’m sorry I’m such an asshole. I’ll probably be one again.”
I laughed, unable to stop myself. That was the strangest apology I’d ever gotten. He grinned at me. “I’m being totally honest.”
“I know.” I wiped at my eyes. “Thank you for that, ah, apology. Okay. That was weird, right? The way that the wizard rode the flying things?”
He nodded. “I’ve never seen them manage it before. No one has. It’s strange for sure.”
“Judge knows some things. He just does. He says things like he knows them. Also, one of the people who helped with the ritual said something about an offering being accepted. Carissa got angry at her, and they fought about it. I think they all knew something.”
After a second, he nodded. “Okay. Truett can talk to Judge, or he’ll write to him. We’re not headed back there. I’m not sure how to handle the woman from the ritual. They’re considered sacred. We can’t seek her out, and I don’t want you going back in there to find her. I’ll dwell on it, but maybe we can find out what Carissa knew. We’ll find her husbands. I think I’ll send Pascal and his group after them. That seems like a good use of their talent.”
I hoped Jayne didn’t hate such an assignment. Then it occurred to me that I hadn’t thought about Caroline. I caught my breath. “I forced visions on Caro. Is she okay?”
He nodded. “About the same as you. Tired, hurt, but fine. She woke up a little while ago and her husbands are very concerned about her, as we are about you. They’re new to this, so they’re pacing around.”
“You’re obviously not pacing around.” I sighed. “Where is everyone else?”
He kissed my head again. “Pacing around.” Gently, he pushed on me. “Lie down and let me love on you, Sloane. We both need it, and what’s more, we both want it.”
I should say no. As he’d said, he was an asshole.
But he was also right, I did want it. Right then. A lot. Only I wasn’t one hundred percent sure I understood what I wanted. I understood the mechanics, because I grew up on a farm and I wasn’t an idiot, but I wasn’t sure how it would go between us.
“You know that I have no experience with this, right?” I chewed on my bottom lip. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”
He kissed the end of my nose. “I’ve never understood why they send you ladies out into the world so innocent. All of this is natural. I will take care of you.”
My nipples hardened at his words, and that was a new sensation for me. I caught my breath. Still, I wasn’t horribly relaxed. “Could anyone just walk inside? The flap is open.”
“Anyone walks in, and I’ll stab them with my knife.” He shook his head and kissed me again.
