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His eyes narrow at me, and I want to punch him because he’s looking too close. “Does this have anything to do with the guy you’ve been hiding from?”
I don’t want to flaunt Thad. The look on Liam’s face when our eyes met through the window at Christmas broke my heart. When he cornered me later, my resolve nearly crumbled, and I almost told him everything. It was a struggle to remind myself he doesn’t get to be hurt. And if he is, it’s his fault.
And I saw the same expression on his face earlier when his thumb brushed over the ring. Despite my anger at everything, I don’t want to hurt him. But there was another reason I agreed to this sham with Thad. I need Liam to believe I’ve moved on.
“Yes.” I won’t lie to him. Thad and I have been friends for too long for it to work. Not to mention, he knows everything. He was where I ran to when Liam was stalking my dad’s house. He watched me nurse my broken heart and was a fantastic shoulder to cry on. The best part: he is terrified of commitment and monogamy, so there were no jealous girlfriends to cause problems. Just a string of one-night stands and random hookups.
Then, two months ago, his father handed him an account. Thad thought it would be a slam dunk until the whole deal almost fell through because the CEO, a staunch supporter of ancient traditions and ideas that a man needs a wife and kids to be reliable and responsible, saw him as anything but. He’s twenty-four years old. He shouldn’t be expected to be a family man yet. But Thad begged me to pretend to be his fiancé. In his mind, it was the perfect solution. There was no chance we’d become a cliché romance and fall in love. We tried that years ago. In fact, Thad was my first kiss, albeit a dirty trick on my part, but it was an awful one.
But no one can ever accuse me of not giving something a second chance. At least not when I’m not sober.
He dragged me from his apartment in LA, kicking and screaming, for a night out. We both had way too much to drink. And let’s face it, I’d been an emotional train wreck for months. I was also horny. One thing led to another, and we kissed. And once again, it felt all wrong. Not even copious amounts of tequila could make it good. We both agreed never to speak of it, shook on it, and then slunk to our rooms. I don’t know about him, but that kiss killed my buzz.
I clap my hands at him and gesture for him to stand. “Now, come on. I need you to play the part and put on your most Oscar-worthy performance. FYI, touching and possible fondling and groping will be required.”
He blanches, and if I didn’t have the same reaction when the words left my mouth, I’d be insulted. “I’m not that good of an actor, Lil.”
“Of course you are. You convince every woman that rides your dick how awesome you are. You can do this.” I’m a great cheerleader when I need to be.
“Nice. Real nice.” He rolls his eyes and stands up again. “Fine. But only because I want to meet the jackass that made you cry. Then kick his ass.”
“Whatever you need.” I grin wide. “Just make it believable.”
Lily
I stand in front of the full-length mirror, slipping the ruby jeweled comb into my hair, then step back. The red dress clings to the hourglass curves genetics blessed me with. Four-and-a-half-inch, purple, lizard print Tom Ford stilettos make my legs look spectacular. A wicked grin curves my red lips as I preen at my fuck you outfit.
“Lady in red?” I turn to see Thad adjust the sleeves of his black suit.
“What do you think?” I twirl, giving him the full view.
“I think I hate you for making me feel like I’m kissing Eden.” He says, mentioning his older sister. “But at least you make good arm candy. I’m guessing that wasn’t the goal, though?”
I walk over and pat his chest. “You assume correctly.”
“Lil, have you thought about… I don’t know, moving on, maybe? Instead of shutting yourself off.”
I raise a brow, tossing him a disbelieving look. “Says the serial… fucker?”
His mouth puckers in an amused pout. “Have I ever mentioned how classy you are?” I kiss the air in his direction. “Come on, brat. Your man called up a few minutes ago.”
“Oh, you made him wait? Perfect! If kissing you wasn’t like kissing Angel, you’d totally get lucky tonight.”
We walk to his private elevator and start our journey down thirty floors. With every floor, nausea builds in my stomach. My foot taps against the floor, and I fight the urge to chew my nails. All things I cannot do. All it will take is one slip for Liam to smell blood—to know this thing with Thad and me isn’t real.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Thad asks. “You don’t have to.”
I look up and huff. “I do, actually. At least until I can talk to my dad about getting me out of this contract, if I’d known they’d pull this shit, I would never have agreed.”
“Out of curiosity, when did you decide you wanted to be a rock star or whatever instead of a… What was last semester? A psychologist? A lawyer saving the planet?”
I chew my cheek for a second, contemplating if I want to tell him the truth. If I want to tell him I’ve always wanted this, but when your older brother is practically a musical genius who is surrounded by more musical geniuses, you develop an illogical fear, especially when it doesn’t come easily or naturally to me.
That bothers me more than I’d like to admit. Most things I do—I learn—come easy. A few minutes, and it’s effortless. Music, not so much. I’ll never be as good as Angel, and as childish as it seems, that’s an issue for me.
Liam is the only person who knows my secret—desire and fear.
But these songs poured out of my soul. They’re the blood of my heart. I didn’t consider recording them, but when Maddox and Ryder said they were good, I thought this could be my chance to finish purging Liam while chasing the dream no one else knew about.
