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I didn’t answer. Barely moved. Greyson had been my closest confidant for years, but he rarely opened up about my brother’s death or his struggles. It was a part of him I’d never been able to reach, but in the dark of my bedroom, I could see his admission for what it was. A gift and a price.
“Do you still have them?” I asked, putting off the truth for just a moment longer. “The nightmares, I mean.”
“They’ve disappeared mostly, but when they come back, I just come in here and watch you breathing. It helps me.” Greyson’s eyes narrowed, and I steeled myself. “Talk to me, Mari. I need to know what’s going on.”
We’d been circling each other since Dominic had come back, and after the club, I’d been too scared to talk to him for the first time in our lives. There was so much we needed to say and so much that could wrong. But Greyson deserved the truth.
Inhaling, I held the breath, trying to force myself into a measure of calmness. By the time I let it out, I felt as ready as I’d ever be. “What do you want to talk about?”
His eyes trapped mine as he answered. “What did Sean offer you?”
“What?” I’d been expecting to talk about us first. The club, our feelings, something else. Anything else. I should’ve known better. Greyson never went for the easy targets. He went for the throat without fail.
“You’re hiding something, and it has to do with O’Bannon.” I started to refuse, but he growled under his breath. “Don’t lie to me. I’m not an idiot, Marianna. In fact, I think I’m probably the only person in the world who knows you just as well as you do. So, what is it? What did he offer?”
I couldn’t speak. A part of me thought if I said the words, it would make them real. Like we’d have to move on, only getting to have that one perfect moment together. I didn’t want that. I wanted Greyson. So, I did the most selfish thing I could.
I kept my mouth shut.
He shoved out of the chair with a frustrated snarl, pacing back and forth at the end of the bed. Every movement was more agitated than the one before. Finally, he turned to me, and all that anger washed away to a resigned weariness that ate at me.
“I thought when Dominic came, that it was the end of us,” he confessed quietly. “I thought that any chance we had together was over because he was back and you had history. Distancing myself from you and my feelings seemed like the best option. You’d get Dominic, and I’d be able to stay close. I didn’t realize that he would be the one to bring us closer, but he has. Did you know he’s the one who pushed me to take a chance with you?”
Surprised, I shook my head, and he scoffed, like he couldn’t believe it either. “He’s been pushing me, egging me on since he got here. At first, I thought it was the same old shit we did as kids, but it wasn’t. He wants you happy, and he knew that you wouldn’t be without me in your life. I didn’t want to risk us, but he kept goading me with the idea of us together.”
He sat next to me on the bed, his hand grasping my neck lightly, long fingers brushing against my jaw. He looked through me, like he was seeing all the parts of me and the whole at the same time. “I was too scared to make the first move, but the thought of never having you got to be too much. So, I took a leap of faith, and you caught me. For one night, I had you, and everything was perfect.”
He tightened his fingers on my neck, and a surge of heat rushed through me. Greyson’s eyes darkened, noting my reaction. He brushed his lips against my cheek, my jaw. Soft whispers of touch that sent goose bumps across my body. “I thought things had changed after the club. You said we would figure things out, but we didn’t. Now it feels like you’re slipping away all over again, and I can’t do it. I can’t lose you when I’ve just gotten you, but I’m so tired.”
“Tired of what?” I whispered.
“I’m tired of fighting against you, and I don’t know if I should fight for you. I need to know if this is something you want, Mari. If I’m something you want.”
It was as if the dark gave him the comfort to offer up his secrets. Maybe it would do the same to me.
“I want you.” It was the safest thing I could say, especially when my final secret was so close to the surface.
Grey exhaled, shoulders dropping with relief as he pulled one of my hands between his and pressed his lips to it. When he spoke, he did so against my skin. “Stop shutting me out. We’ve fixed every problem we ever faced as a team, so let’s be one now.”
Moment of truth. I could feel it, like the universe was telling me things would never be the same. I gave myself a second to grieve the possibilities of the future, just in case, then I nodded.
“What did Sean O’Bannon offer you?” Greyson asked.
I brought our hands to my mouth and pressed a kiss to his fingers—one last kiss in case it all went downhill. One kiss to hold on to forever, even if I lost him. “He offered Aislynn’s hand in marriage.”
Grey’s head jerked back. “For you or…?”
Honestly, I could have handled it if he’d offered Ash to me. We could’ve made an arrangement that gave us both our freedom, and I would’ve kept Greyson. But Sean wasn’t as forward-thinking as I was. He cared about heirs for his legacy, not love or devotion.
My stomach twisted as I shook my head. “For you.”
As if someone had pressed pause on the moment, Greyson’s whole body stilled. His eyes, though… They were dark and confused, his brows furrowed. He was trying to sort out an equation with half the variables and coming up with an error.
“When?” he finally asked.
“Opening night,” I admitted. “He saw you dancing and suggested we unify the families.”
“That’s when you pushed me out. What happened after the club, then?” He wasn’t talking to me, but to himself. “Nothing, unless you count Nate coming, but that shouldn’t have mattered.”
