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“You’re focusing on flaws, aren’t you?”
I nodded, a tear leaking out in spite of my best efforts. Nothing said provocative like crying in front of the man undressing you. Good one, Juliette.
“Do you know what I see?”
Shaking my head, I braced myself for whatever he would have to say.
“I see a petite body that carried a big, healthy baby boy. It took some stretching to hold him in there for nine months. I see strength. A badge of honor, if you will, that says ‘you’re a mother.’ You should be proud to wear those marks.”
He was doing it. I was completely distracted from the fact he was viewing my stomach in the mirror. Instead, I relaxed into him and his beautiful words.
His gaze traveled down my body while his fingers ghosted over my skin, from my stomach down to my clit. “You’re absolutely beautiful, Jules. These slight imperfections that you see make you even more perfect because of the reasons you have them. Witnessing the way you mother your amazing son only cemented for me how very special you are.”
Next he unclasped my bra. Both his hands came around to cup the weight of my breasts, which didn’t sit as perky as they used to.
“When I look at your breasts, I think of how you must have looked while rocking your baby and feeding him at night. How beautiful it must’ve been to know you were sustaining a life with your body.”
How? How could there be someone this perfect on the planet who wanted me? His moving, heartfelt words had tears tracking down my face.
He spun me in a half circle and knelt down in front of me, kissing those marks that I’d been so embarrassed about and had concealed for years. “No more hiding. You’re exquisite. The moment you have any doubt, I want you to remember right now, me in front of you wanting nothing more than to worship your gorgeous body.”
My breath caught. In that moment I knew I was undeniably in love with this amazing man. He was making me feel like I was the most incredible thing in the world. “Thank you,” I whispered, the tears falling freely now.
He kissed my stomach and then stood so he could travel his mouth up to my breasts, my neck, and finally capture my lips. “Don’t cry, beautiful.”
“They’re happy tears, I promise.”
He smiled tenderly, wiping my cheeks with his thumbs. “Let me hold you on the bed?”
Calming my nerves, I took a deep breath. This. This was what trust and intimacy were all about, and I wanted all of it. That meant I needed to let go of my insecurities and believe the words he’d told me. “I want you to make love to me. In the light.”
He hesitated. “Are you sure?”
I framed his face with my hands. “I’ve never been surer about anything or anyone in my entire life.”
He met my lips, pouring so much emotion into the kiss that it left no doubt how much this meant to him. Backing me up to the mattress, he lay me down gently. I watched him pull his shirt off first, followed by his pants, boxers, and socks. My eyes immediately tracked to the small S tattooed above his heart on his chest. It was the first time I’d seen him in the light, as well.
S had to be for his fiancée’s name. I wasn’t prepared for the emotion that hit me upon seeing it. He was clearly devoted to the memory of the woman with whom he was supposed to have spent the rest of his life.
“I can put the shirt back on if you want.” He was watching me, honing in on my fixation with his tattoo.
“No. It’s part of you. And I don’t want anything more between us.”
His tender smile almost caused me to tear up all over again. Then he covered my body with his. Skin on skin, he rolled me slightly onto my side. In this position, I wasn’t supporting his full weight, and he could put his thigh between mine, entwining us together naked.
The kiss he gave me could’ve melted steel. It was hot and sensuous, leaving no doubt how very turned on he was. Nuzzling my neck, he whispered, “You know this is more to me than sex, don’t you?”
I murmured, “It is for me, too.”
“I want to be part of your life and that of Tristan’s. And I realize the timing—Jesus—I shouldn’t be saying these things to you on the day of your husband’s funeral. I’m sorry.”
I leaned back, so we could be eye to eye. “Today made me sad because someday I’ll have to tell Tristan that his father chose drugs over him, over us. And that he ultimately died because of it. You knew I’d need you here, and you came. Please don’t apologize.”
“I want—No, I need you in my life. Both of you.”
His expression was so intense that I swallowed hard. “What are you saying?”
“I’m saying I want a future with you.” He muttered a curse, running his hand through his hair. “And again, today isn’t the day I should dump all of this on you.”
