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“Don’t cry, Nöku Ahi. I want you happy, not crying.”
“They are not mutually exclusive, Jabarri. I can be happy and cry. You make me happy. This was,” I take a deep breath because I can’t think of adequate words to describe what he did tonight means. “This was everything. What is the name of the song?”
“Turning Page© by Sleeping at Last.”
“So beautiful,”
“I agree, will you walk down the aisle to me to this song?”
“Jabarri!”
“Are you proposing to me?”
“I am just asking you a question,”
“I’ll answer it if and when you propose,” I tell him. The song ends, and the couple leaves as quietly as they came.
“Hmm, fair enough. One more favor?”
“Mmm,” I hum.
“Dance for me?”
“Dance for you?” I am shocked by the request, I haven’t danced in front of anyone in years. I started out doing cheer dance when I was five, my mom put me in jazz, ballet, ballroom, contemporary, and hip hop. I was a majorette in college but stopped dancing once I graduated. That explains the dress. “Is there a song you want me to dance to?” I ask noticing we are completely alone.
“Whatever song you want to dance to me with,” I hop out of his lap, take my shoes off, search my phone for the song, and begin stretching in preparation to dance for him. This is crazy. I am giving this man a private dance, Jabarri! What reality am I living in? I find the song I want, connect to the Bluetooth, and press play. Jazmine Sullivan’s On It comes on, and I close my eyes and let the music move my body. I forgot how freeing dancing is for me, to just stop thinking and just feel the music take over. I glide across the floor, spin, fall to the floor, and do it all over again, moving however the music tells me. I finish on the floor, back arched, one foot pointed, the other knee bent, pulling my hair and breathing hard. Before I can catch my breath, he is on top of me, kissing the little bit of breath I have away.
I widen my legs to make room for him as he plunders my mouth, coaxing moan after moan out of me. I pull the tie binding his hair, and it falls like a silken cloth shielding us from outside view. I grab it and hold on for dear life, and his hands travel my body, touching everywhere.
“Do you know how beautiful you looked dancing? How sexy? Do you know how bad I want to explore your body from the inside out? Lick every inch, fuck every hole? Do you know how bad I just want you?” he says between kisses, and my body and mind are in a heated battle. I want him, but I am scared to have a repeat of the first time I was with a man. But I am older now, and this isn’t a teenage boy who barely knew what he was doing; this is Jabarri, my Jabarri. “But we aren’t ready, and I can wait. Besides, our first time is not going to be on the floor of a dance studio. Wrap your arms and legs around me,” he demands, and he stands with me in his arms like I weigh nothing. He sits me in my chair, kneels in front of me, and puts my shoes back on. I am not sure why, because he carries me out of the building back to his car.
JABARRI
We left for home early the next morning. Skai led, and I followed. I don’t know how much longer we can keep whatever this is hidden. I want to say we are in a relationship, but I can’t until the situation with Natalie is squared away and she doesn’t seem to want to tell her parents anything anymore. I think she is enjoying having her cake and eating it, too. She’s gotten to the point where she is lying to her parents, telling them she is with me when she is really with Scottlyn. She’s had me put her security camera on her back door on a loop so she can sneak in and out of her house without her parents knowing. Generally, I wouldn’t care, but until she settles this with her parents, my and Skai’s relationship is on hold. But truthfully, even if she told her parents today and blew up her life Skai and I have to tackle our family. I don’t know how Josh or Savvy will feel about her and me being in a relationship. This really is a cluster fuck of a situation. What would I do if they were against our relationship? Would I sacrifice my family for her? Without question, I don’t want to have to make that decision for me or her. She stirs in my arms, and I know she is waking up.
Her therapy is going better, her heart is healing, and she is accepting that the things that were done to her weren’t her fault. Truthfully, the things people chose to do to her have nothing to do with her and everything to do with them. But her mouth, that shit, is still razor sharp. I called her a tiny big mouth and she called me Barbie, her new nickname for me. Out of all the damn nicknames she could have come up with from Jabarri, she settles on Barbie. But honestly that was the first time I saw the old Skai peeking back through the shell of the woman that has been walking around since Alayna betrayed her.
“Did you drool on me?” I ask her when she lifts her face off of my chest and wipes her mouth.
“No, I didn’t drool on you! You get on my nerves, I was touching my face because I lost feeling in it after laying on your Nestle Crunch-covered chest,” she says, and I burst out laughing.
“Now you know you capping. My chest is smooth as a baby ass,”
“Yeah, a baby porcupine,”
“Oh, I see someone woke up with a smart-ass mouth this morning,”
“I wake up smart every morning,” she says, climbing out of bed and damn near running to the bathroom. She uses it, washes her hands, stands in the doorway of the bathroom, and opens her mouth to say something when the doorbell rings.
“The notification didn’t go off,” she says, rushing over to her phone to check and remembering both of us putting on phones on silent so we could get some sleep. She checks the camera and cusses, making me look and see Alayna standing on the doorstep. “What the fuck! Let me go tell her to get her ass back to wherever she’s been.”
“Don’t do that. Go see what she has to say. This may be your chance to get some answers. I’ll stay in the bedroom out of sight. If she ain’t saying nothing you want to hear, tell her ass to leave,” I tell her, and she nibbles on her lip before saying okay and heading to the front door.
Skai
I open the door, bracing myself for the feelings to come rushing back, but it never happens.
“You got some fucking nerves.”
