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12
Amber
Something was going on with Frank and it was starting to really bother me. Whatever he thought he was doing was not helping anything. We went from being around each other and sharing everything together, to me having to wonder if he was seeing someone else. There was obviously a secret that he was keeping from me, and I wanted to know what he wasn't telling me. It made sense that the ‘why’ was because it was something bad.
I am not proud of what I did next. I was so worried about what he was lying to me about that I was willing to go to great lengths to find out. I was, in fact, considering changing a lot about my life, moving back to Hampton, so I needed to know the truth. Whatever Frank was hiding from me, I needed to find out what it was. Then, I could make a real decision, because Gemma would not stop calling me, reminding me that I had a whole life waiting for me. I needed to know if staying here, and Frank in general, was worth it.
So, instead of going to bed, which admittedly I should have done, I made my way to his house. I wanted to believe that I wouldn't find anything when I got there. Really, I didn't want to. Because then that would mean that everything I felt for him wasn’t real. How could I ever want that?
When I got to his place, nothing really seemed out of the ordinary. There was no extra car in the driveway, and everything seemed to be pretty normal from where I was sitting. I was parked across the street from his house, and I was really starting to feel like a stalker more than anything else. I didn't like it at all.
I didn't like the way it all made me feel. I shouldn't feel like this. I shouldn't feel like he was being dishonest with me, and I wish that I could ask him straight up what was going on. It would have been so much easier that way. I wouldn't have had to wonder, like I was now.
After sitting there for about half an hour, I just felt like an idiot. There was no great party going on, no mysterious woman coming and going. None of that was part of it. The only thing that I saw was a house with a couple of lights that went off very early. One on the upper floor went off by ten, almost on the dot. Was that what time he went to bed? It hadn't been when we were together.
Leaving, I still had this unsettling feeling that there was something major that I was missing. I felt like a failure because I hadn't figured out what it was. I went back home and called Gemma.
I don't know why exactly I did. I really wasn't worried about what was going on at the office. I should have been. It was the business that I had worked for years for, but in the end, I was only thinking about Frank. I was hoping that business talk would help me get my mind off of him.
“When are you coming back, Amber? You really need to get back. I can’t put off these meetings for much longer. It’s like you dropped off the face of the planet, and we have to get going with the new line…”
I stopped her right there and assured her that I was well aware. She had been sending me lots of emails and giving me the blow by blows. They had gotten more frantic, and I knew that she was rightly in a tizzy. I had left with the idea that I would be gone a couple of days. It was well into week two now.
“I don’t know, Gemma. I am going to be a bit longer. Some things have come up, possible opportunities.”
“There, in Hampton?”
She was incredulous, and since the town was so small and known for open space, it wasn’t the sort of town that would help my high-fashion line. No one there would be interested in my clothes, or their price point. I don’t know what I had been thinking.
“I am still working on it, Gem. You know that I don’t like to say anything until it’s fully brought together, though. You know how I am.”
“I know, but what do I tell your clients?”
“That I had a death in the family.”
She was silent for a moment, and I felt bad using Grandad’s death in that way. While it was true his death was affecting me in many ways, all of this stemmed from the trouble that I was having with Frank. He was the one that caused me all kinds of issues.
“Anything you say, Amber. I just want you to know you can count on me for whatever you need. I am here for you.”
The more she talked, the worst I felt. I got off the phone with her, agreeing to meet up with a potential wholesale client that I couldn’t ignore. I’d waited months to get an appointment with her, and Gemma was right, I had to go. I was hoping that by then I would have an answer about Frank. I didn’t know what it would be, but I was hopeful that I would be able to figure something out.
Gemma didn’t settlemy mind, so the next morning I was up early, trying to get everything together that I needed for the meeting. Champs was a wholesale clothing line that wanted to introduce my new line to their customers. They had a huge market share, and I was hopeful that they would take me on. That would mean I would no longer have to do smaller sales. I would be a real clothing line, then, and not just a boutique.
Finding out that Grandad didn’t have internet, about three o clock, I was trying to get some work done and my phone just wasn’t cutting it. I needed a program on it, and I headed down to the only place close by that had public internet. It was a hybrid coffee and ice cream parlor. I needed caffeine, and I grabbed a coffee, before I sat down to work a while.
A little girl’s voice made me look up. It was a little dark-haired girl around seven or eight. She had on a school uniform, and she said something about wanting to get her dad some ice cream.
“What do you think he would like, Caroline?”
She smiled and then said without blinking that he wanted Blue Moon.
“It’s Dad’s favorite, just like mine.”
The older woman that was presumably her mother agreed, and they got two cones and left. I know that I was being paranoid now. Blue Moon was a popular ice cream in the area. I knew that it was a lot of people’s favorite ice cream. So, why was I only thinking about Frank? I knew that it was his favorite, so now he was on my mind. I didn’t see a connection to the little girl. It was just a coincidence. Or, it was the universe’s way of driving me crazy. I wasn’t sure which one.
Frustrated that he was now all I could think about, I left not too long after the pair with the two cones did. I went back to Grandad’s place and did a few sketches. I wanted to have some visuals to show to the people I had to meet, to give them an idea of what else was in store.
I spent the rest of the evening working. It was a reprieve from all of the chaos in my head. Soon, I was thinking about fabrics and colors, not Frank and his mysteries.
