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I want to question him but stop myself. I need to let myself enjoy this, and if I’m constantly worried about what’s going to happen next, then I won’t.
“Okay. Tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow.”
I wake up to knocking on my door the next morning.
“We’re going for lunch. Wake your ass up.” I look at the clock and gasp. It’s after eleven o’clock. I haven’t slept that late since I was studying for finals.
“I’m up!” I yell to JJ, who just chuckles before I hear her footsteps move back toward her room. I jump out of bed, head into my bathroom, and wash up. I don’t bother to shower because I took one last night before my phone call with Damon.
That phone call replays in my mind, and my body heats at the memory of the whole scenario. The words he said to me still send shivers up my spine, and I can’t wait to see him tonight. It’s like I’m in high school again, and the bad boy asked me out on a date. I shake out of the memory and pull on a pair of ripped jeans and a white t-shirt that I threw on the floor a couple of days ago. I sniff it quickly, making sure it’s not too dirty, and open my bedroom door.
“Took you long enough,” JJ teases as she pulls me down the hall so we can grab our coats and head out.
“Says the girl who takes a minimum of thirty minutes to get ready.” She gives me a look, and I laugh. It wasn’t always like that, but since she met Liam, she’s been experimenting more with makeup and clothes, and she found her confidence. It makes me so excited for her. It’s been too long.
“So, where are we going?” I ask as we walk out the front door and into the elevator.
“Thought we could go to the coffee place down the street. I know you like it there, and it’s close.” I smile, loving the idea.
When we get to the shop, we head inside, and JJ and I stand in line to get food. As we’re standing there, the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end, and my sense of awareness piques. My back straightens, and my head swivels to see if I can tell where the uneasy feeling originates from. But I come up empty.
“What’s up?” JJ asks as we make our way to the counter and order our drinks and food. I get my usual latte with a chicken sandwich, whereas JJ goes for coffee and a scone.
“Nothing. I just have this funny feeling that someone is watching me lately.” My eyes scan the room once again. Though the place is packed, no one seems to be looking at me.
“I guess I’m just paranoid,” I mutter as the barista hands us our orders.
“Are you Clara from Clara’s Corner?” the girl behind the cash register asks. I nod my head slightly. “Sorry to put you on the spot, it’s just my sister loves you, and I wanted to just say hi.” I look her over. She looks as if she’s in her mid to late twenties and cute. Curly, blond hair falling lazily down over her shoulders. I look past her and see a few more of the baristas staring. The girl just smiles.
“They’re huge fans,” she says, motioning to the women behind her. I meet their eyes and smile, reminding myself that this is why I make my videos. To inspire. I catch the eyes of a guy heading toward the back room, it’s only for a second but a chill runs through me. It’s only when he’s gone that I turn back toward the girls in front of me and smile.
“Thanks so much. Tell your sister I said thanks for watching.” I motion to the group and smile. With that, I take JJ’s hand and lead her to a table in the back. I feel the unease following me, and when I look back, the girl is still watching me.
“What’s going on with you? You seem spacy today.” JJ stares at me with that mothering look she gets when she’s worried about me. I sigh.
“I just read a comments on one of my videos and it freaked me out. That’s all.” She gives me a knowing look, and I roll my eyes.
“I know you told me not to read them, but most of them are really nice, and I have to answer the questions that are left. It’s how I keep the viewers coming back.” JJ knows it’s true, we’ve talked about this briefly before, just never in detail.
“Still, there has to be a way to monitor that kind of crap.”
I tell her about reporting it and getting the email back saying that they were banned.
“It still doesn’t stop them from creating another account and doing it again.” I take a deep breath, knowing she’s right. After all, that’s exactly what happened. I just hope I can get this all under control before it goes too far.
“I know. But I try to ignore it. It’s just, this time, it got under my skin.”
She asks what they said, and I tell her.
“Who the fuck are these people? I swear, it’s like they think they’re hot shit because they’re behind a computer screen.”
“No shit,” I mutter as we sit, and I watch the crowd around us.
“You ever think about stopping?” I shake my head no. Because that’s not even an option. I knew when I started my YouTube channel that I would be in the spotlight more than I was used to—more than I wanted—but running it also means I can share my passion. That’s something that means more to me than feeling uncomfortable in public spaces. It means I’m doing something that brings me peace.
I can’t give that up.
