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“I don’t know,” I say. “Depends on how vicious that spell is.”
She shudders. “I don’t want to think about it. No matter how evil he is, even Sultan shouldn’t have to live through having his tongue ripped from his throat. That’s just…barbaric.”
“What the Shadowbanes would do to our families should they succeed in taking Nightfall would be much worse,” I say, holding the door open for her after she’s switched off the last of the lights.
She pauses in the doorway and lifts her chin, bringing her lips a whisper from mine, awakening that deep, twisting ache only Casey Wonderfully has ever made me feel. I want to pull her into my arms and kiss her until she melts against me, then promise her I’ll never let anyone hurt her or our little girl.
That I’ll rip their tongues out with my bare hands first…
But I only have a little over two months left and Casey has decades of life ahead of her. I wouldn’t be able to keep that promise, so I don’t go for the kiss.
That’s the first rule on my Loving Casey the Best I Can list—Don’t give her false hope.
I knew the night we met, that this brilliant, adventure-hungry woman was my One and that she was already falling as hard for me as I was falling for her. That’s why I left without saying goodbye.
I’m cursed. The only thing I can offer the people who love me is pain, regret, and grief when I’m gone, and I couldn’t do that to Casey.
I can’t do that to her.
I can’t, I can’t, I can’t, I chant silently as her breath warms my lips.
“How did you know I was in trouble?” she asks.
“I didn’t. I was waiting outside when I heard you cry out. I thought I’d walk with you to pick up Amy.”
“We didn’t have plans to meet up? Did we?”
I shake my head.
“Oh, so you just…missed me, then?” Her gaze softens with hope I hate myself for putting there. “You couldn’t wait until trick-or-treating tomorrow to hang out with me and my super cute kid?”
“We should go,” I say, pressing back against the door, putting a few much-needed inches between us. “I’m sure the daycare staff is wondering where you are.”
The sparkle fades from her eyes. “You’re probably right.”
I’m absolutely right—there’s no doubt about that—but it doesn’t make this hurt any less. As I fall in beside her on the way down the quiet street, it feels like a rodent is gnawing a hole through my chest.
Which reminds me…
I touch a hand to Casey’s elbow, even that brief brush of skin-on-skin enough to make the longing even worse. I’m practically drowning in it as I say, “Remind me to bring Flip a treat while we’re out tomorrow night. She deserves the lion’s share of the credit for catching Sultan.”
Casey cringes. “Okay. I mean, ew, but okay. But don’t expect me to keep this from Emily. As a good employee, I’m obligated to tell my boss that our stoop is infested with rats.”
“It’s Flip, two of her daughters from a previous litter, and half a dozen grandrats. I wouldn’t call that an infestation.”
Casey’s chest heaves and she presses a fist to her lips. “Please stop. I’m going to be sick. I have a thing with rats. One night when we were kids, I woke up to find a rat in Everly’s bed, munching on her big toe.”
My brows lift. “A rat ate your sister’s toe?”
“No, it was only licking her toe—turns out Everly had been training it to do tricks while she was bored over winter break and it wanted her to get up and play—but still… It was traumatic. The image of that gnarly rodent hovering over her little foot is burned into my brain.” She stops at the base of the path leading through a small playground to the front of the daycare center. “No talking about any of this in front of Amy, okay? She understands more than people think, and I don’t want her to be scared. I’ll just tell her I broke a glass and had to clean up the mess and that’s why I’m late.”
I nod. “Of course.”
“But we’ll talk more once she’s in bed,” she says, her dark eyes locking with mine. “I want to know everything about the Shadowbanes. Knowledge is power, and as a non-magical witch, I need all the power I can get.”
I nod, biting my tongue for the hundredth time as I watch her hurry up the path to the small, mushroom-shaped building.
Casey absolutely has magic, it’s practically sparks from her fingertips, especially when she’s dancing or playing patty-cake with the baby. She just hasn’t learned to channel it yet. When she does, I wouldn’t be surprised if she proves to be as powerful as Blaire.
