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“My squadron in the Marines was positioned on the front lines for several weeks, one mission in particular considered delicate and highly dangerous. We’d been designated as an elite group who could secure our line of position, preventing several villages from being pillaged by insurgents. We accepted our responsibility without hesitation, our various skills in weaponry and explosives making us an impenetrable force. For ten days, we fought the enemy without losing a single member of our team. Then the bastards got wise to our tried-and-true tactics, the captain refusing to alter our plans even though several Marines had warned him of a possible ambush.”
I found myself caught in the story he weaved, unable to breathe or move a muscle. In his eyes was a look of pride and loyalty along with a deep-seated sadness.
“One night during the middle of a thunderstorm, the bastards struck without warning. They’d managed to surround us, killing the men and women positioned on the outskirts. Within minutes, chaos ensued, firepower unlike anything we’d seen before erupting. In truth, we were caught off guard. We’d allowed our defenses to fall just enough that the stories we heard about their fallback had influenced our behavior.”
Jesus Christ. I cringed, every muscle stiffening from the heartache I heard in Viper’s voice.
“More men went down, good men I’d served with and protected for months. Two died in my arms. Then they tossed Molotov cocktails at the villages. You’ve never felt agony until you’ve heard the screams of innocent people who’d trusted us to keep them safe. Men. Women. Children. It didn’t matter to the bastards who’d attacked us. As the fighting continued, all the respect I’d had for walking on the right side of justice and good shifted. I no longer cared what happened to the enemy soldiers, killing them indiscriminately in my attempt to save the men under my command as well as those who didn’t deserve to be stuck in the middle of a brutal battle.”
Swallowing, tears formed in my eyes, his words forming horrible images in my mind.
“So, sweet Madisen, I became the monster that you see before you today, not the man you painted on that canvas or the one you were determined to marry. He died on that rainy night in a dark field where the stench of blood filled my nostrils and hasn’t left to this day. And you know what? I enjoyed every kill, every shot I fired. I reveled in yanking out my knife, the one I’d never used up to that point, gutting the bastards who’d dared ambush and slaughter the people I cared about. If you’re wondering whether or not being a Marine or being a member of the Cosa Nostra is worse, I can tell you in all honesty that the people I killed in both the line of duty deserved it as much as the traitorous rats who dared defy the syndicate and the family I’ve come to call my own. Now you know the man you thought you’d marry is pure evil.”
When he stopped speaking, my heart was in my throat.
Then he got up from the table, taking his plate with him.
CHAPTER14
Madisen
Sleepless nights.
I’d experienced my share of them over the years like everyone else had. No one was immune to heartache or dread about an upcoming event, unable to shut down the demons and just fall into a peaceful sleep. As soon as I opened my eyes for the hundredth time since Viper had sent me to bed like a disobedient child, I realized morning had finally dawned, erasing the ugliness of the ominous shadows that haunted me during the lonely night.
I’d not only insulted him, I’d also managed to drive him away. I’d remained where I was, hearing him loudly scraping the plate as if he was angry with the world. After another clatter, he’d stormed back into the small dining room, instructing me in no uncertain terms to call Mike then go to bed. His reason for the second command? That’s what I obviously needed. By the scowl he’d worn, I sensed he believed I needed more than just rest.
Shivering, I threw back the covers, my head aching since I’d been the dumb girl to finish the entire bottle of wine by myself while cleaning the kitchen. By then, he’d been long gone, sequestered behind his closed bedroom door.
The story he’d told continued to haunt me, not because of the subject matter but his reaction. He truly believed he was an evil man. The thought of not really knowing him remained in the back of my mind but even through his arrogance and self-centered attitude all those years ago, he’d never done anything I would consider evil. While I’d convinced myself he was a terrible person, that had been for selfish reasons.
Hating him was better than missing him.
Now he was right here only a few yards away and every word out of my mouth was caustic. At minimum I owed him an apology for doubting him. As I rolled out of bed, I glanced at my phone. Since bursting into Viper’s life, he’d asked me to do two things. Let Mike know where I was and stay put. I’d violated both, which meant he couldn’t trust me.
Time to bite the bullet. At least in spouting off to him the night before, I’d realized that he was under some code of honor with my brother about my welfare and that I was too good for even him. Touching but annoying. I was a grown woman and could make my own choices. Maybe it was time I made certain Mike knew that.
I grabbed the phone, rolling my finger across the screen then hesitating. I wasn’t unlike anyone else who didn’t like confrontations, but it had to be done.
When I reached his voicemail, I was grateful I wouldn’t need to talk with him. “Hey, Mike. I wanted to let you know that I’m still in LA. There are a few things I’m trying to work out and Danny is allowing me to stay with him for a few days. Don’t worry. I’m fine. I just need some time to think. Thank for allowing me to crash for a few days. I really appreciate it. I’ll call you when I’m headed back.”
So I told him a partial lie. It was better than him worrying about me as it seemed he’d done. I only wished that Mike had expressed his concerns over the years instead of talking to Viper. Although it was endearing.
I headed to the bathroom to brush my teeth, changing into shorts and a tee shirt. Next on the agenda was an apology. Then I’d work on a different painting. With only one canvas left, I’d take my time since I doubted Viper would purchase new supplies. Besides, I couldn’t ask him for favors. He’d done enough already.
As soon as I opened the door, I listened for any sounds. The house was far too quiet, as if there was no life behind the fashionable landscaping and pristine exterior. There were no plants, no fish, and I doubted he would ever own a pet. It was just him and his surly attitude. I doubted he watched television, although he owned five that I’d counted, or had sat down to read a book in years. He had a gorgeous bookshelf in a second living room, hundreds of books in perfect condition. If I had to guess, I’d say he hired a decorator who’d insisted he warm up the place with a library.
I walked into the kitchen, searching for a coffeemaker. What I hadn’t looked for was coffee and with my big head, I needed some. After searching in the cabinets, I found a new box of breakfast blend coffee pods meant for the Keurig machine that I bet had never been used.
Since I had to add water to the container, I knew I was right.
After pressing the button, I checked the fridge. At least he’d opened the carton of orange juice. Maybe I was rubbing off on him. Oh, who was I kidding? I grabbed the mug, forced to drink it black and making a mental note to request half and half. Then I moved through the various rooms in search of him.
When I heard a series of hard thuds, a moment of fear swept through my system. What in God’s name was the sound? I walked down a hallway I’d yet to explore, another slam purposeful and jarring. Then I realized what it sounded like, fists connecting with something hard. I moved toward the closed door, trying to convince myself to walk away. I doubted he wanted to be interrupted.
What I’d learned about myself was that until I confessed or apologized, I couldn’t get on with the rest of my day. I slowly turned the handle, easing the door open. I didn’t see him until I walked in. When I did, I was immediately torn with a part of me knowing I should leave and the other wanting to bask in the moment of seeing his hard, sweaty body.
With him dressed in nothing but tight runner’s shorts and tennis shoes, I was given another glorious look at his chiseled body as he cracked his fists against a punching bag. I held my breath, trying to control my nerves as well as my desire. All the sparring we’d done, all the years I’d spent wanting to hate him didn’t seem to matter.
