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“Oh.” My brows drew together. “I added more balloons and changed the menu. I moved the party to the end of the day so we could release fireflies and watch them flash while we sipped tea or hot chocolate and had cake.”
Blasé giggled. “Wow. That’s quaint.”
What the fuck. Snarky bitch. “Well, isn’t that different enough from last year?”
“Not really.” My bestie sighed. “Look, I love you, but I want to stay home.”
“Perfect,” I agreed more sharply than I had intended. “I’ll see you another day, I guess.”
“Doubtful, but we can hang out in virtual reality instead.”
I hung up without bothering to respond. I was done with her— with people in general. Everyone was always tired and bored now. I honestly missed when me and my friends were younger, and everything was still new and exciting.
I was no longer going to allow my supposed friends to hurt me like this. No matter how tired I was, I would have never missed their birthday party. Especially not my bestie’s special day. Boring or not, I would have attended.
Blasé said she loved me, but I didn’t feel it anymore. Like my parents, she was saying it, but not really meaning it. Because actions were louder than words, so the ancient saying went.
I was tired of it.
Tired of living the lie.
Tired of feeling everything while they pretended and felt nothing.
I hardened myself against the heartbreak of betrayal. It was my birthday, and I shouldn’t have to grieve on my special day. But I wished I could be as apathetic as Blasé was about life. Because I was tired as well— tired of feeling unloved and lonely.
The resentment was real. My parents had never really been more than “responsible birthing vessels” to me, but Blasé was supposed to be different. We were the family we chose. We chose each other.
Now, she might as well be a stranger. I couldn’t remember the last time we had really connected.
“I don’t need her anyway,” I muttered. “Fuck it.”
Deciding I was going to celebrate my special day regardless of zero attendees, I went into my room and showered. I allowed my assigned android to wash my hair and soap me up, which was something I rarely did since entering puberty. Having the smooth, nearly faceless machine touch me intimately was more awkward now that I was older, since my body would sometimes respond to its touch. Though I was sure many people had relations with their personal robots, I preferred having virtual sex with strangers instead. All sensation and zero touching.
I took my time getting ready since I had a couple hours to kill. I made sure my hair and makeup were perfect. I chose my party dress and ballet slippers with care. I checked that all the food was ready, balloons were filled with helium, the candles were gathered for the cake, and that the lanterns stowed for when night fell. Everything was organized and packed by the house bots, and as usual, they were flawless in their service.
My personal android, a robotic extension of the universal computer assigned to care just for me, ushered all the automatons into order for our little convoy. Sometimes I wished the personified Ai looked a bit more human so I could pretend I had a friend. Sadly, androids were purposely made from smooth, gray metal for that very reason— to deter humans from getting too attached. Androids were tools, not natural creations. Humans weren’t supposed to get attached to tools.
Finally, it was time to go.
I decided to hitch a ride to the field with my garden furniture, reclining on a cushioned lounger like a figure in classical art while the bots carried everything, including me, to the party location beyond the city limits. Yes, I could have insisted we called a vehicle, but it was so beautiful outside. Why drive when we could walk?
When our little caravan arrived, everything was immediately unpacked and set up. I stood on the sidelines to watch the bots, under the direction of the android, arrange my furniture for the party. A soft breeze blew, rustling the grass and picking up the scent of the wildflowers. Truly, this was my happy place. It calmed my spirit.
I bet more people would be happier if they didn’t stay in their homes all the time.
Though it was just me and the bots enjoying the nice weather, I was having the best time. We released the butterflies into the wild and watched them flitter around the local flora that surrounded us. This year’s butterflies were even more beautiful and interactive than last year’s batch. Some even lingered close and landed on me.
Maybe these ones just responded better to having no people around, laughing and talking and chasing them about.
As twilight rolled around and the full moon rose, the butterflies seemingly disappeared. So we illuminated the lanterns. It was like an old-world fantasy. I was sprawled out on my lounge with a mug of hot chocolate and a blanket, watching the bots release the fireflies. It was amazing to see them float, twinkling like dancing fairy lights.
Now that I was twenty-one, it was time to make real decisions on what I was going to do with myself. I found life in general lonely these days. While the Ai could fake companionship, the computers and robots didn’t eat or drink. They weren’t soft or warm to the touch. They didn’t do human things like trip over their feet or pee their pants from laughing too hard. Yet, what could I do to change my situation? At least the Ai didn’t let me down the way humans did.
My android brought over my cake with twenty-one lit candles on it.
“Would you like me to sing to you the birthday song?” my Ai asked.
I smiled, welcoming the distraction from my melancholy. “Sure.”
