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Searching for me.
Words flew out of me before I could connect them to an image or thought. “He watched her. Taunting her. Pressing her. Gods, her pain. And the King and Phobius… who couldn’t be that old, surely? And Lucius. The evil saw me.”
I see you. Do you see me?
“Go on,” Esta whispered.
So I did. I knew I wasn’t making sense, but I couldn't stop the onslaught of the crisp, cold words flowing out of my mouth. “Roses and too much green. A knowing voice that refused to show her—and it was a her—face, that I wasn’t ready to see her. Not yet? No. Maybe?” I grabbed my head, feeling like it was being squeezed.
Esta patted my hand, which was so very cold against hers in comparison to her warm one. “That’s enough for now. Let me get you some wine. It will help warm you. I’ll be right back.”
By the time she had returned, I was at the window watching the snow fall. Each flake was a ball of white fuzz like the fur from an ermine. The sky was a silver that matched the chain on Lucius’ neck, his eyes. My heart stuttered, and I hastily moved my fingers off my claiming mark, not realizing I’d been touching it. The temptation to reach out through the bond was torturous, but I was too afraid of what I’d find there.
“Here you go.”
I turned, my arms crossed and accepted the metal cup. “So what now? What does it all mean, those visions?”
“It means something bigger than the two of us is coming and you need to be there when it arrives.”
I sighed. “That isn’t helpful.” I took a sip and raised an eyebrow. “This is excellent.”
“I make my own,” she replied, sipping her drink as well.
“Do you have a mate?” I asked, not seeing an osnat on her ankle, wrist, or neck.
She shook her head. “I… well, honestly, I never found anyone that tempted me.” She waved a hand behind her, where the workshop was. “I make my own tonics to avoid the heats, and I stay busy enough. Not many Ongahri here, see, unless they are doing business with the merchants.”
“I see. That was what I wanted before, too. Before—” I touched my neck, my fingertips drifting over the smooth smoky stone embedded in the chain around my throat. “Before I married. I tried the tonics, but… Well, as you said, things happened because they needed to.”
“Those tonics were never meant to work, which I think you know now,” she said simply.
The numbness I’d been feeling parted away like the clouds of Ordelpho as I processed what she’d said. “They were tampered, weren’t they? Gods.”
She nodded, emptying her cup before setting it down gently on the table. “The sisters of Delphos needed you to go through your heat.”
“What right did they have to do something like that?” A sense of pure rage went through me. Farah was the one who had given me my tonic every morning, had been the one to get them replenished once or twice a week. But at least, now, I knew Lucius hadn’t been responsible. “Why would they do that?”
“Because they needed you to move, Sierra. Lucius and you were destined. Still are.”
“But even I didn’t know Lucius was going to be the one to claim me until I was in heat! I could’ve—”
“It was a risk they were willing to take. You had been watched every second you were there.”
Gods, I was tired of these games! “How do you know all this?” Suddenly, I became very suspicious. Who could blame me?
Should I even trust this woman? Had I been so wrapped up in my emotions over what had happened in that Ongahri meeting that I’d simply thrown away logic, blindly following a stranger in a strange city, drinking her tea and wine, and spilling all of my deepest thoughts and secrets to?”
She saw the instant I doubted her. “Now you are ready.” She waved a hand over the dying flowers in the vase on the table. Before my eyes, the blooms were plumping, the stems hydrating, the heads of the dried, brown roses transforming into fragrant silky red blooms.
“You,” I said.
“Yes,” she answered, her voice weaving a blend of all voices, just like in that castle I saw during the rite, the foyer with the three doors. “I’m afraid you’ll have to forgive me for the next part in this, Sierra. Be brave, child. It’s for the best. Sometimes we need a few pushes to put us where we need to be. Some more than others.”
“Wha—” but I couldn’t finish. Everything stopped and I knew nothing but black.
Chapter Thirteen
Fadon
