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I shut my eyes and grip the counter tighter, gritting my teeth around the sudden surge of feelings in my chest. I hate to admit it, but Misha is not the only reason I’m so reluctant to fulfill my revenge. My feelings are such a mess, and…goddamnit, why do I still have them?
I was supposed to leave them behind years ago—but apparently my heart is still alive, and it’s still beating harder in Louis’s presence.
But okay, my heart isn’t that big of a problem. I’d be able to swallow whatever affection is still kindled in me and live with it for the rest of my life. But what am I supposed to do with my body? Whenever I see Louis, something inside of me clicks, filling me with a wave of desire so strong I have to force myself to act even harsher than usual.
The memories of the pleasure he gave me haunt me every night, and I can’t help but touch myself, thinking about him. I’ve never met a man who understood my sexual desire so well, and it drives me crazy to have him so close again. Even now, the thought sends a wave of warmth through me, and I hate it, god, I hate it.
Haven’t we been here before? Hasn’t he broken my heart already?
I breathe out sharply and open my eyes when the temperature in the kettle reaches its peak. I have to pull myself together. I have to follow my plan and get my revenge—but the thing is, I don’t have a plan. I’ve spent four goddamn weeks in Louis’s house, and I still haven’t come up with a plan to get rid of him.
Sasha, it’s really time for you to toughen up.
I feel so weak just thinking about it, and it only makes me more aggravated. No, it’s definitely time to do something. Mom’s murderer is right under my nose, I can’t just sit around and let him think we’re some kind of a family. We’re not and never—
“Oh, hey. I haven’t seen you in a while.”
Louis chuckles, entering the kitchen with an empty cup in hand, and I don’t have enough time to stop myself before I automatically step away from him. Goddamnit. Was that too obvious? He glances at me weirdly, so I guess it was, but what can I say? I don’t want him to be anywhere near me, I—
But it’s too late. Something in my stomach warms up at the sound of his voice, and I swallow a flash of arousal and look away. Shit. I really have to find a way to get over this. Maybe I should go out and find a good guy to have sex with? Although I doubt he would be as good as Louis—and damn it, thinking about it doesn't make it easier.
“Good to see you, too, I guess,” Louis murmurs, placing his cup in the dishwasher, but I ignore him until he walks out of the kitchen and stops in the hallway. “I gotta go, buddy. See you soon.”
“Bye!” Misha waves his enthusiastic goodbye, and from the corner of my eye, I watch Louis leave the house. Where is he going? Isn’t it too late to start work?
I hum under my breath, watching him get into his car under the faint light of the setting sun, when I see another car approaching our driveway. It’s Mrs. Lee, arriving just a little early for her drawing lesson with Misha—and suddenly, something in my mind lights up.
If she stays here with Misha for the next two hours, I’ll be able to follow Louis and shoot him away from Misha’s eyes. All I need is my gun, a dark hoodie, and some luck to not be caught on the way. It’s a perfect plan, and I run to the second floor to grab all I need before hurrying to open the door for Mrs. Lee.
“Hi, listen, I have a very urgent thing to deal with, can you look after Misha during the lesson?” I say in a hurry even before the young woman says anything.
“Wait, Mom, are you leaving, too?” Misha gets up on his feet, looking at me with a frown, but I can’t let this chance slip away.
“Yes, teddy bear, I’m sorry. I’ll be back very soon, alright?” I send him a flying kiss and, not waiting for any other questions, run out of the house and to my car. It’s time to start the chase.
Unfortunately, the few minutes that I used to grab my stuff and talk to Misha and Mrs. Lee were enough for Louis to drive quite far away. But when I stop by the highway leading to downtown Chicago, I catch a glimpse of his car in the distance and turn to follow him.You won't get away from me again, bastard.
I tighten my grip on the wheel, burning with determination, and keep my gaze on Louis's car. I will get him this time. I won't fail.
I keep some three hundred feet between us all the way to downtown, but when Louis drives off the road and into the neutral territory of Bedford Park, I lose him at the first intersection. Goddamnit! But no, it's alright, it's nothing. I breathe out, feeling my heart pounding in my chest, and look around. I just have to check all the streets nearby. He couldn't have gotten far away.
It takes me a while to drive around the blocks, and I’m almost starting to feel desperate when I suddenly spot an Italian man with wavy hair, wide shoulders, and a black coat. Is it Louis? No, it's probably one of the Messinas' spies—but what if not?
My whole body tenses up in alertness, and I lean over the steering wheel to take a better look. Oh damn, no, that is Louis! He even stops by the doors of a coffee shop to check something on his phone, and I recognize his face in an instant. Gotcha.
My heart picks up its pace with a rush of adrenaline, but I force myself to breathe and focus on finding a parking spot. I keep glancing at Louis through the rearview mirror, and I clearly see him take a quick look around and enter the coffee shop. I guess he has a meeting or something. The crowd inside doesn't make it easier for me to shoot him. But it does make it easier to get closer to him, and then I'll just have to wait for a good moment to get rid of him once and for all.
Do I want it, though? Am I actually ready to do this? Doubts crawl their way into my mind again, but I push them back down and check my sheath. I've waited nine years to get revenge for my mom's death and Misha’s suffering. Giving up now means betraying them, and I can't do this. Even for my own heart, I can’t.
I pull the hood over my head, pretending to hide from the drizzling rain, and rush into the coffee shop. There are plenty of people already, complaining about the weather over the slow and rhythmic music. I hang around the counter for a bit, locating Louis's presence from the corner of my eye. He's managed to secure a stool by the bar counter, and judging by his coat hanging on the stool next to him, he's still waiting for someone.
Well, I guess I have to find a place for myself as well. For a moment, I even contemplate going back to my car—I have to wait for Louis to finish his meeting or whatever, so it doesn't matter where I'll be in the meantime, right? But eventually, I decide that it's better to keep an eye on him and stay as close as possible. Who knows what he plans to do next.
So I order a cup of coffee to stay alert, find an empty corner on the other side of the coffee shop, and sit down to wait. I keep my eyes on Louis, and I can see that he keeps glancing at the entrance in what looks like nervousness. Whoever he's waiting for, it must be someone important.
Finally, after almost fifteen minutes of waiting, Louis fidgets and sits up straight, and even though he keeps staring down at his empty cup, I know he's already noticed his companion. And indeed, a few seconds later a person walks over and casually takes the stool next to him. It's a woman, clearly older than him, in an elegant dark blue coat and with a hat and a scarf keeping her face and hair hidden.
But even though I can’t see her properly, especially from the other side of the shop, I can't help the feeling that I know her. There's something in her figure and manners that tugs at the strings of my memories, and I feel a tight feeling in my chest. It only grows stronger when I catch a glimpse of her profile, and this time I can't stop myself from getting closer to them.
