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How was I such a fool? All the comments he would make about how I should look for a more feminine job. Even though I was part of the team that rescued him from his wreck, he never felt like it was a profession suitable for a woman.
I laughed them off, thinking he just wanted me in a safer job. One where he didn’t have to worry about me coming home each day.
I park my car on the curb and head inside my building.
I don’t know how I made it home safely, the whole drive is a blur. Vague images of cars passing, lights changing between red, green and yellow, and pedestrians walking.
I shouldn’t have been driving at all in my state. My poor judgment thankfully hurts no one along the way.
No, it was placing my trust in the two people who shredded my heart with a filet knife. I’m the only one who got hurt, and they didn’t even seem to care how badly.
How could they?
They were together all this time, and I didn’t realize it.
I’m so stupid.
How could Courtney betray me? I confided in her about everything. Even about how I was thinking of having sex with Lionel and not waiting. She was the one who encouraged me not to. Reminding me that the night would be more special if I waited, giving him the one gift I could only give away once.
Fucking bitch didn’t want to give up Lionel. She must have known he’d be done with her if I gave in to him.
I stick my key in the lock and push my front door open, stepping inside. Taira’s voice breaks through the haze I’m in. She’s my neighbor who I’ve become pretty close to.
“Alex! Earth to Alex.” She catches the door before it closes and follows me into my apartment. “Alex, are you okay?”
I can hear her, but it’s like we’re in a tunnel and there’s construction going on, pounding inside of my head. I try to say something, but it just comes out unintelligible, with a lot of stuttering and sobbing.
She takes hold of my shoulder, pulling me around to face her. “Alex, what’s wrong?” Her face is full of concern as she takes in my disheveled appearance. I know I must look like a mess.
“Oh, my god. Did someone die?”
I shake my head, still unable to speak.
She has her blonde hair piled on top of her hair in a messy bun, with her bangs hanging down, just dancing along the tips of her heavily mascaraed eyes. Her cornflower blue eyes are locked on me, worry present in them as she presses her pale pink lips together.
In a matter of minutes, they completely uprooted my life. If I hadn’t gotten off early and gone there, I would’ve never caught them. I’d still be oblivious.
“Come on, sit down and I’ll get you something to drink and you can tell me what happened.” She guides me over to the couch, easing me down on the plush cushion as she disappears into my kitchen, only to return moments later with two glasses and a bottle of Pink Moscato.
I look around my living room, taking in how it’s absent of anything remotely me. Everything's in its place, not even a mess to tell you someone lives here. The walls are a pale color with no pictures hanging on them. The only pictures in the room are the two sitting on top of the entertainment center. One of my parents, my brother, and I, took on a family trip to an amusement park before they died, and the other of my grandparents.
“Okay, now tell me who I’m killing!” Taira’s words break my wandering thoughts and my eyes drift back to her.
She pours our drinks and hands one to me. I reach out to take it, letting my purse slip off my arm and fall to the floor. I lift the glass with a shaky hand and take a large sip. When the drink hits my tongue, I sigh and close my eyes.
“I still can’t believe it. He… he… he cheated on me!” I finally blurt, saying the words out loud, making it more real.
“Lionel? I’ll kill the fucker. Who’s the skank and how did you find out?”
“I got off early. Captain Olsson asked if I could switch shifts with one of the guys and let me go home early. It was the perfect opportunity to see Lionel since he was working from home. Taira, I was even going to tell him I didn’t want to wait. That I wanted us to go all the way finally. But when I showed up, I found him in bed with Courtney.”
“As in your best friend Courtney?”
I nod my head, not able to verbally confirm my best friend betrayed me.
“That skank ass bitch!” Taira downs her wine and pours another. “And that bastard. You were too good for him, anyway.”
“No. I. Wasn’t.” I force out between sobs. Lionel was the perfect man, or so I thought. Maybe I was just so in love with the idea of love that I overlooked his blatant flaws.
