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"How fucked up are you to have sex with someone right before or right after they OD?" His brow went up at that as he jerked back. "Yes, I was drunk. Yes, I was high. Hell, I might have literally been asking for it. But any decent human being would know I was too messed up to make that decision for myself and would have..."
"Okay," he cut me off, tone almost infuriatingly calm. "Let's just stop that before it gets out of hand. We didn't 'have sex'. You don't know me and I get that waking up in someone else's bed in someone else's clothes with no memory is scary, but I am not that guy. I don't take advantage of women who clearly need help. You are right. You were fucking messed up. That shit would have been rape, not sex. Just so we're clear on that. You're here because you begged me not to take you to the hospital."
The hospital.
My stomach clenched hard at that as my eyes fell to my hands.
"Sorry, I shouldn't have accused you. I... this is my fault..."
To that, he let out an exhale so loud it was pretty much just a glorified sigh.
"Let's start this over," he suggested, moving in the room a foot, but not approaching the bed. "My name is Lazarus Alexander. You're in my apartment. The only thing that happened last night was I found you outside Chaz's; I helped you get that shit out of your system; I brought you back here and let you clean up and sleep. That's it. I slept on the couch."
Okay.
I exhaled slowly, trying to calm myself down.
That wasn't that bad. I mean, it was horrible. He had helped me get that shit out of my system by shoving his fingers down my throat and helping me throw up. That was just... humiliating. There was no other way to put it. But at least I hadn't done something as dangerous and careless as getting so trashed that I slept with an absolute stranger.
Small miracle, for which I felt wholly undeserving.
I gave him a small nod. "I'm Bethany Bates," I offered. "Thanks for, well, saving me last night."
I was thankful. Actions of the night before aside, I didn't actually want to die. I wouldn't even say I was particularly in a self-destruct spiral. Things had just... gotten bad. And I hadn't dealt with it in a healthy way. I had never even been close to an OD before and I hadn't even been using the pills for long.
Not that that was any kind of excuse.
An addict was an addict whether they used for a week or fifty years.
"Can I level with you for a second?" he asked oddly, watching me with those dark eyes of his. It was intense enough that I almost felt the urge to squirm under it, like maybe he could see all my secrets.
"Sure," I croaked, my heart lodged in my throat making it hard to speak normally.
"I'd really prefer that, after I saved your life, you didn't go and throw it away again."
That hurt. I wasn't going to lie. He barely knew me, but he didn't want me to die. It was more than could be said of the people I did know. Hell, he seemed to care more about my well-being than I did.
"I would prefer to not OD again too," I admitted. Granted, I didn't remember most of it, but that was almost somehow worse than if I did. Scarier.
"What I'm saying is, I think you should stay here and detox."
Alright.
So he was crazy.
Only crazy people said things like that. Not because he wanted me clean. Any sane person would want an addict to clean up their act. But you know... in a hospital setting where people could keep an eye on you and give you those detox meds and whatnot.
A place I totally would have gone to if I had insurance.
"That's, ah, a nice offer. But really..." I started, swinging my legs off the side of the bed and moving to stand.
I hadn't noticed him moving too, but when I looked up, he was in front of the doorway, blocking it. I felt my belly twist, knowing just knowing down to my bones that things had just taken a turn into OhShitsVille.
"I had kind-of been hoping you would just agree and make this easier," he said, a certain sadness in his eyes.
My heart was frantic, beating hard enough to be nauseating. "Make what easier?" I managed, feeling like I was choking on my own tongue.
"You're going to detox here."
Yep.
Crazy.
Freaking bonkers.
Fantastic.
My eyes moved to the window for a second as I took a deep breath and tried to keep calm. "Look, it's nice of you to care about me. But you can't just... keep me here. I mean you could try. But this is an apartment building," I added, hearing a TV set sound coming from somewhere nearby. "If I scream, someone will hear me."
