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"It's not a lie. Just not the whole truth, I guess," I admitted, shaking my head, unable to look her in the eye.
"Her lips look thoroughly kissed when I came in."
Thoughts of the actions that led her lips to looking swollen, red, and over-sensitive shot through my head. It took actual focus to try to push them away. Knowing there was a time and place to replay those kinds of things. And dog walking with your baby sister was not one of them.
"Good eyes."
"And you want to say there's no Savvs, huh in your life?"
"It just happened. It's not like we're having some clandestine affair under all your noses for days. It literally just happened."
"But she's been staying with you, right?"
"Right. It's not safe for her to go home."
"I didn't have you pegged for a lover of damsels in distress. I mean, don't get me wrong, you have what it takes to be a White Knight. You make a living doing it. But I figured that seeing all those damsels in your office all the time would have kind of turned you off to them in your personal life. You know, that work/life balance thing."
"Savvy isn't a damsel in distress."
"I mean, but she is. You are literally protecting her with your life, trying to find the bad guys who want to do her harm. It's textbook."
"I mean, she's not just that, Scotti."
"Right. She's the steady, always in your periphery Savvy who you never gave any attention to, never whisked away to a corner to puff up her lips in all the Sundays, all the holidays, all the times she had been around you. She's always been there. And you've never made a move. Until she showed up, what, crying and shaking?" she asked, face scrunching up, voice getting venomous. "Please dispute this, King, because I'm really not liking thinking of you this way."
Scotti was a woman you would never accuse of being in distress, of needing to be rescued. And she hated the idea of a man being drawn to a woman simply because she was having a weak moment in a life otherwise filled with self-sufficiency and strength. She thought it said a lot of him and nothing at all about her. And, what's more, she wasn't wrong in that.
"You're wrong in thinking Savea had been in my periphery. Or background noise in my life. Trust me, kid, I have been acutely aware of her presence at every one of those Sunday dinners. Seeing her in that red dress last Christmas was like a punch to the gut. Watching her drop down on the floor and play with the dogs or one of the kids has never been something I barely noticed. I noticed. I always noticed her."
"And yet?" she prompted as Padfoot started leaping up in the air as we turned into the heavily wooded path.
"And yet... a lot of things."
"Such as?"
"Such as I'm a lot older than her."
"Okay. So what? She's an adult, King. It's not like it's creepy or anything."
"She's Peyton's best friend."
"And need I remind you - Peyton is not related to us."
A snort escaped me at that. "I'm aware of that."
"And you're not an asshole," she added.
"Come again?"
"I mean, I could understand if you were a dick. Someone who just wanted to take Savvs for a ride, then kick her aside, never to think of her again. I could get you staying away from her if those were your intentions. But that's not you."
"No," I agreed. No one could even accuse me of getting around. Maybe I had a little fun right after I first moved out of home as a young adult. Back when my life was just about paying a few bills, having fun, having complete freedom. It had been short-lived though. Slowly, but surely, my brothers moved in. And while they were having their fun, I had sort of been put back in the position of being big brother, of being the responsible one. Then, well, Mom died. And Scotti was in need of a steady parental figure. My life became about providing for her, taking care of her. Once we were adults, it became about avenging our mother. Which left no time for attachments. Or even many casual encounters.
Once Scotti settled down in Navesink Bank with Mark Mallick, we all decided to set down roots. And once that idea came to me, I knew I was going to lose another couple of years to building a new life. Women simply weren't in the equation. I always figured I could find someone someday. We'd likely have to forego the kid thing. Or maybe I would find someone with kids already, get a chance to be a step-dad.
"So if you liked her, I can't figure out why you didn't make a move. I mean, if you felt weird about the whole Peyton situation, you could have had a talk with her. And I think we both know what her response would have been. Something that involved some sex tips and recommendations of the best toys to incorporate in the act."
