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He released it the moment I touched down, and I adjusted a little, but not too much; I didn’t want to make him think he hadn’t done it right. It was probably better, because it forced me to sit up straight.
Mr. Blackbourne sat across from me. He met my eyes.
Nerves vibrated within me. His face, the serious expression, held something more. He was waiting to speak with me. Something was bothering him. I felt it.
Dread weighed down on me like a rock in my stomach. This wasn’t just breakfast. He had something to say. I had said I wanted to talk to him, but this was beyond that. He had deep concerns troubling his mind and he was waiting to tell me. Thoughts flew through my mind as to what it could be. I had to move back into my mother’s house because it wasn’t working living with Nathan. Someone complained about something I did. The Academy wasn’t accepting any more students at this time.
The waiter at the bar came to us with a couple of menus. “Good morning,” he said. “Beating the Sunday crowd, I see. We just opened.”
I forced a smile and looked to Mr. Blackbourne nervously, my tongue gluing itself to the top of my mouth. I wanted to say something to be polite, but I couldn’t find what to say. It wasn’t like he’d asked a question.
“When the churches release, it won’t be so quiet,” Mr. Blackbourne said, taking up the menu and glancing at it. I did the same, but only holding it up, because it felt rude to read it while the waiter was hovering and talking.
“Yeah,” the waiter said. “You would have thought the two churches close to this place would release their Sunday mass at different times. Give them to us in shifts instead of all at once.”
“I believe they like releasing at the same time for a different purpose.” Mr. Blackbourne looked up from his menu, facing the waiter. “It’s more a show of numbers and identifying who attended where. Seen and be seen.”
“I’d believe that,” the waiter said. He then glanced at me and smiled. “Could I get you two anything to drink?”
Drink? How could I know when you were talking? I forced myself to glance at the menu, my eyes scanning to find something that was a drink. My eyes had a hard time adjusting since I was nervous. I couldn’t say why exactly. The waiter wasn’t unfriendly, but I didn’t know him and he was easy with his conversation; I was afraid of being sucked into it and unable to respond.
“Could we have water for the moment?” Mr. Blackbourne asked.
“Right away,” the waiter said, nodded and smiled again at me before he walked back behind a kitchen door and disappeared.
My heart eased, just a little. I studied the menu now, trying to prepare an answer for the inevitable question of what I’d like to eat. I’d already talked to enough people I didn’t know today and I was already worn out.
“Do you prefer an omelet or French toast?” Mr. Blackbourne asked.
Toast’s menu featured all day breakfast like the diner. I went through the menu quickly, checking prices along with what would be easy to eat. I was too nervous for anything heavy, though. “I think I’d like something with fruit,” I said.
“Oatmeal?” he asked.
“I was looking at the yogurt.”
He nodded. “Would you care for something besides water?”
“Juice?” I didn’t mean for it to be a question, but I wasn’t sure what I wanted. I thought of orange juice and then I realized it might taste funny with the yogurt. That and lately when I drank orange juice, it wasn’t long before my throat was scratchy so I usually didn’t drink much.
Mr. Blackbourne moved the menu from his face and looked at me. “I believe Mr. Lee mentioned you like mocha coffee?”
My lips parted and my cheeks heated. How much did Kota and Mr. Blackbourne talk about me? “Nathan usually buys the Mocha Frappuccino bottles from the store and I drink those. I haven’t tried much else.”
A smooth eyebrow arched. “Would you like to try an iced mocha here?”
I slightly shrugged and nodded at the same time. It sounded interesting. Trying something new. There was so much to try in the world, and I wasn’t sure where to start.
Mr. Blackbourne glanced once more at the menu and then placed it on the table. I put mine down, too. He’d unbuttoned the front of his jacket but kept it on. Sitting up straight like he was, with his lips pressed together, and the steel in his eyes, he was striking. I’d thought Luke could be a model, but Mr. Blackbourne could, too, only for elegant clothes like suits.
“Before I start,” he said, “you’d said you wanted to talk. Is anything wrong?”
I shook my head quickly. I edged my finger along the seam of my jeans, seeking out some focus. “From what I understand, I can’t join...I can’t sign up for the Academy unless Kota and the others agree I can. Or something like that.”
“They could probably hinder your eligibility in some way, but they couldn’t stop you altogether if it was what you truly wanted,” he said. “It is true, though, that Mr. Lee doesn’t think you should. He believes you’ve been through enough and he wouldn’t like you to have a life similar to what we lead.”
“Don’t I already?” I asked.
Mr. Blackbourne touched gently at the very corner of his glasses, adjusting what was already perfect. “I don’t share his sentiment. I believe he’s more afraid for you, which is something he faces regularly, every day, with everyone on his team.” His steel eyes narrowed on me. “But fear is something we shouldn’t allow to make our choices for us.”
“How could I convince him?”
Mr. Blackbourne’s lips twitched. “Time, I think. Part of it isn’t really the danger, either, I believe.”
“What’s the other part?”
“It’s what we’ve talked about before. About family. About trying to keep us together, and making sure we all get to know you well.”
I wanted to ask questions, to figure out exactly what he meant, but I couldn’t form the words. How much did they need to get to know me? How much time would that take?
Th
e waiter returned then with two glasses of water. He looked at me. “Are we ready to order?”
“She’d like the fruit and yogurt with an iced mocha,” Mr. Blackbourne said quickly. He picked up the menus from the table and passed them over. “I’ll have the garden omelet and a regular coffee.”
“Cream and sugar?” the waiter asked.
Mr. Blackbourne nodded. The waiter took the menus and walked away. Mr. Blackbourne sipped at his water before he continued with me. “This was part of what I wanted to talk to you about. I suppose we should start there. The time is coming when we should be together on this, and it may happen sooner than I’d hoped.”
“What will happen?” I asked, suddenly more nervous.
“The Academy is asking to meet you, in a way,” he said.
I waited, hoping he’d provide more of an answer. His steel eyes fixed on me but nothing came from him.
“Is that bad?” I asked.
“It might be,” he said. “It depends on our reaction to you, and your reaction to them. They know some of the story, but not the whole of it.”
“What don’t they know?”
“They realized your parents are gone, but only a handful of people know why. They also know we’ve taken a special interest in you. They don’t know it’s because we’d like for you to join our family, or that you’d like to join us.”
I caught on to his meaning. “I’ll need to convince Kota before I meet them?”
He nodded. “We’re probably lucky the holidays are coming up. That’ll give us some time, but I have a feeling New Year will be our first meeting. Which means we’ve got about a month.”
My eyes widened and my hands balled into fists under the table. That wasn’t much time at all. “What do I do? Where do we start?”
“Again, we’re lucky the holidays are coming up. We’ll have more free time,” he said. He held up fingers and counted off. “Mr. Morgan, Mr. North Taylor and Mr. Korba, so far, I believe are in agreement. Mr. Lee needs convincing, we know. Mr. Griffin is on the fence, but if Mr. Lee agrees, I feel he’ll follow. The others I’m not sure about, although I believe if you expressed your interest, they could be persuaded.”
