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I sighed, shaking my head. “I just can’t believe...it all happened so quickly.”

Kota reached for my hand, tugging at it until I sat beside him. “Are you okay? I know we kind of rushed it. It seemed crazy to me, too, but Mr. Blackbourne...he was convinced it would work.”

“I’m okay with what happened,” I said. “I just can’t believe...I mean, it is hard to think I might actually be out for good. I can’t imagine the favors it might cost for using Liam and Lily.”

“I don’t know for sure, either,” he said. “But I don’t think it will cost as much, with the way Mr. Blackbourne and Dr. Green planned it. This was way less complicated than our long-term plan. We’ll have to talk to an Academy council to go over the last couple of days.” He held on to my hand still and brushed his thumb over my knuckles. “I’m more concerned about you, though.”

“I’m glad to be out,” I said. “I don’t know what the plan is now, though. Do I stay here?”

“For now,” he said quietly. “For the week. If you want. If you’re comfortable...”

“And then what?”

He shrugged. The glasses slipped down his nose a little and he adjusted them. “I think we’ll try having you spend the night with the others off and on. For now. I know that’s a little unstable. We can also use the trailer at the diner now, too. But if you prefer to stay in one place...”

I shook my head. “I’m okay,” I said. “I don’t mind going to different places.” I meant it. Any place was better.

He bit his lower lip. “You can always stay here. I could tell Erica.”

I wanted to reassure him again that it didn’t matter where I stayed, until I realized I sounded dismissive of the idea of staying with him.

I squeezed his hand gently, trying to sound very sincere. “Kota,” I said quietly. “I’m very happy that my first week away from that house, I’m here with you. I hope I haven’t ruined your birthday.”

A wide smile broke on his lips. “Sang...I...wanted you out. I got what I wanted. I wasn’t expecting it to happen so soon, and now it’s just here. Best day of my life.”

The whole thing was surreal. I’d gotten what I wanted, and he’d wanted the same. They all had. It was a moment in time. One minute my heart was so low, so broken from all the doubt and fear about my future. I worried about them all spending so much time watching me, waiting months...

And suddenly here I was.

Who would have thought the one person to help free me was the one person who had trapped me for so long? My stepmother, as much as I feared her, and as much as the thought of her still made my throat close up and my body start to shake...she had saved me.

While I still had to be concerned with the few loose ends left from my past, and to handle what happened, maybe I was finally out, at least. I had my Academy team to thank for it.

Now I could focus on the things Mr. Blackbourne had said I should. Getting healthy, and I vowed to be good about it. To eat right and sleep well. I wouldn’t dare give the Academy a reason to doubt that staying with the guys was anything but good for me, and for them.

I considered what I’d say next, and when I was sure, I simply said it. “About going to talk to Lily. You mentioned I could bring someone with me. I know it’s strange to bring up now, but...will you go with me?”

His hand relaxed. An eyebrow lifted, crossing the black rim of his glasses. “You want me to go?”

There was a hint of disbelief in his tone. It made me pause. “If you want to.”

His hand slowly became stronger, grasping a little tighter, and his smile returned. “Of course...sorry, I just...after what happened at camp and...”

My cheeks heated, and I looked down at our hands. “I’m sorry if you...if...with Gabriel...I’m sorry about that. And for the surprise that you found out.”

“No,” he said, lifting my hand a little higher in his, pulling it until my palm was pressed against his chest, over his heart. “No, no, I’m sorry. You...I know now. I had to talk to the guys a bit, but I realize now that admitting your feelings about ...us... how hard that was. No wonder you were so stressed out whenever...when I got close, you tensed. I wondered why. Now I know.”

It was true. He hadn’t known, and the guilt had been too strong to enjoy anything we did together. “It doesn’t have to be like that anymore. But I don’t want to push you...”

“I was the idiot who wasn’t paying attention,” he said. “It should have been obvious. Just like I wasn’t listening to you in the shower. I should have.”

“That wasn’t your fault,” I said. “I tried to tell you at the time, but I was breathless and...”

He leaned in, pressing himself against my palm at his chest and scooting a little closer. “I’m really sorry about that. I didn’t know. I was doing what Dr. Green did to me once when...when I was afraid of those showers when I was younger.”

My eyes widened. His face was so sincere, silently pleading with me to understand him. “You?”

“I didn’t want to go in camp showers when I was younger. There were lots of bugs. And they were gross. I didn’t have the anxiety you have about showers, but I was stressing myself out. He did the same thing to me, showing me it didn’t matter by going into it with me.” He bowed his head. “I was trying so hard not to treat you differently than how we’d treat the other guys. Face things head-on. Thinking there were big bugs made me more afraid of the shower areas at camp, and I wasn’t looking at them as they were in real life. So he made me look at them and they weren’t that bad.”

It made sense to me. “You didn’t know about me,” I said. “I don’t like the bugs either, but...I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“I’m sorry you felt you couldn’t tell us,” he said. He brushed his palm over my cheek, holding my face. “Sang, we need to be open with you, so you’ll be more open with us. So of course I’ll go with you to see Lily. Whenever you want me to.”

My heart warmed, and I swallowed heavily so I wouldn’t tear up. I didn’t want to now. “I am sorry about Gabriel. And how things turned out. It shouldn’t have been a surprise.”

He pressed his lips together and nodded. “We...have a few things to talk about. But don’t worry. I...I’m not going anywhere. It was just unexpected.”

I was happy to hear that. I didn’t need answers from him now.

He wasn’t going anywhere. The others had said if he really didn’t like the idea, he would have said so.

He was adjusting. Like I’d had to adjust when I’d heard about the relationship dynamic of Lily and her team, and the possibilities. We could use their team as an example, but we were different. We had to figure out where we fit in together, among ourselves.

“Lily can help with that, too,” I said quietly. “We could talk about it with her.”

“I think it is a good idea,” Kota said. “Actually, I was thinking perhaps we all should talk to her. Separately or together. However they want.”

I breathed out slowly between my lips. It wasn’t a bad idea at all.

Kota continued to hold my hand and then reached out to me. He picked up a strand of hair that had fallen across my cheek. He shifted it to behind my ear, where it stayed.

He kept his green eyes on mine. “I...don’t want to go backwards,” he said quietly. “I might not be ready for...for exactly what this will become, but I was ready to kiss you and date you since I first saw you. But I’ll understand if I put you off...”

I shook my head. “I want to if you want to.”

He leaned in. I stilled, feeling a little strange, not wanting to press him.

I closed my eyes.

He kissed my lips softly once and then stopped, his mouth hovering.

His nose drifted over mine, rubbing a few times, like he’d done before he kissed me.

I smiled and smothered a giggle.

He kissed me again, a little harder, a little deeper.

A door opened below at the base of the stairs, and we held the kiss for on

ly a second before I backed away from him with an apologetic smile.

Not that I didn’t want to continue, but I had to be mindful about the others, too.

Dr. Green appeared at the top of the stairs. He opened his mouth, uttered a few syllables, stopped and then blushed and started to backtrack down a step. “Sorry,” he said. “I can come back.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Kota said, standing quickly. He turned to me and smiled. “She’s not going anywhere.”

I grinned. Hopefully not.

Dr. Green came up. He was barefoot and wore the same jeans and shirt from earlier. He strolled over to the bed, glancing at the black duffle bag still on the floor beside it. “I came up to ask her what her favorite pizza was. North is fending off the others from eating the last few slices of a couple of them to make sure she gets what she likes. But I’m supposed to check her blood pressure again and other stuff.”

Kota laughed and headed for the stairs. “Other stuff sounds very doctor of you.”

“I’m a professional,” he said and winked at him.

Kota left, going down the steps and shutting the door.

I stood, crossing the room to meet Dr. Green halfway. “Did you get pizza?” I asked.

“Enough,” he said. He looked around the room and then scratched his chin. “I might have forgotten my medical equipment.”

“Did you really mean to check my blood pressure?” I asked.

He laughed and shrugged. “I should, but it can wait.” He held out a hand to me, palm up.

I placed my hand in his. “I still can’t believe what happened.”

“Great plan, wasn’t it?” He wiggled his eyebrows and motioned to the duffle bag. “Why haven’t you unpacked yet?”

I released his hand to pick up the bag and place it on the bed. “I can. Although if I’m going to be between homes for a bit, maybe I need a better bag.”

“Or you need to divide up your clothes among...” He grimaced. “Eight different homes? Geez. Maybe we do need a schedule.”

I started taking out some items from the bag. I found the journal I’d started writing in, and my cheeks heated as I lifted it out.

Next item on my list: find out how the others felt.

Source: www.allfreenovel.com
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