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I knew. I never believed in love at first sight, but I found it that day.

Nothing since then has been what I expected. The more you got involved with the group, the more I was sure you’d probably fall for one of them. I was afraid I’d find myself forever pining for a girl who saw me as a teacher and barely got to see the real me.

That was, until Owen told me he went to see Lily’s team. A team with several boys with one central girl.

A girl they all later married. Unofficially, but for them, that was their life.

He didn’t have to say so, but I knew when he talked about it that it was right for us.

Every time I spoke to you, Sang, every time we were together, you made me happy. You gave me the drive to be a better doctor, something I never really wanted for myself.

I became a doctor because I was supposed to. My mother had a plan for me and I reluctantly did it to please her.

And now I’ll be forever grateful, because you and the others are often at risk and need me. I don’t care about the job, or the money and security like my mother often talks about.

I want you safe. I want everyone healthy and happy.

I know you inside and out, Pookie. I could memorize the feel of your pulse. The way you look at me, those eyes make me want to stay by you.

I need you, Sang. In my life. I’m not so picky as to ask anything of you except to see me when you can.

I want to tell you something about how I feel. I should tell you in person. I’ve been wanting to tell you for a while. How I’ve fallen for you.

I want to wait to tell you when you can hear it. I’ll always tell you anything you want to know.

You’re free from your old house now. I’m sitting on Kota’s bed, listening to you laugh as you’re eating pizza with the guys downstairs. Later, we’ll be sleeping on the floor with the others.

This is how it should be now. Everything was wrong before.

Does it feel right for you, too?

I don’t want to pretend I’m okay with everything as if nothing bothers me. I think I’ll be a little jealous if I see the others kissing you. I’d appreciate if everyone kept it behind closed doors.

I may forget sometimes, but I’ll try.

I’d also love to be able to see you more. I’d love to take you on dates, anywhere you’d love to go.

I’d love to show you some of my own favorite places.

I know I’m busy. But seeing you more is what I need. It doesn’t have to be all the time.

Maybe now I can just call you and say good morning sometimes. Call me often. I love hearing your voice.

There’s a few questions I have for the others. Jealousy might be something we have to work on together. This won’t be easy. I don’t have a problem talking with anyone about this. I’m ready to talk about it.

I won’t pressure anyone, like Sang said, but this won’t work without all of us.

We’ve said we’d support each other no matter the final decision. I don’t know how we will end up.

Honestly, I don’t mind how. I’d camp in a tent all year long, as long as Sang and you guys were nearby.

Also, my parents. If things work out, I don’t think I could explain to them the truth.

I know many of us share this issue. Some of us may be facing this much sooner than later, especially if Sang will be staying at everyone’s houses regularly. Questions will be asked.

We need to be prepared.

But we can’t do any of this without being sure about ourselves.

We’ll also have to convince the Academy this is right for us.

Lily and her team can only help us so much. We have to figure the rest out for ourselves.

Maybe this notebook will help. If you’re in, then I hope you’ll write in this.

That’s all we really need, isn’t it? Just a confirmation that we’re all willing?

I’ll tell everyone, when they’re ready to hear it, how I feel about Sang, and how I want my family, my brothers, to stick together.

And Sang, Pookie, if you feel this is right, I’m in. I’m behind you.

With love,

Sean

Thank you!

Source: www.allfreenovel.com
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