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“And it’s only October,” I grumbled.
The Saturday night crowd never came in, and three hours after we reported for work, it was still dead. Raegan propped her chin with her fist, and clicked the nails of the other hand on the bar. Two guys were playing pool over by the west wall. One of them was wearing a Legend of Zelda T-shirt, and the other guy’s clothes were so wrinkled, he looked like he’d dressed straight from the dirty laundry hamper. They weren’t the sort to attend an underground fight, so it wasn’t hard to guess what had stolen our business.
Raegan’s regular, Marty, was sitting alone at her end of the bar. He and the pimply faced boys at the pool tables, they were our only patrons, and it was ten o’clock.
“Goddamn it. Goddamn those fights. Why can’t they have them during the week when it won’t cut into our tips?” Raegan said.
“They’ll come after, and then the whole bar will be one big fight, and you’ll wish they had all stayed away,” I said, sweeping the floor for the third time.
Kody walked by, glancing at Raegan from the corner of his eye. He depended on being busy to get through a whole night of Raegan being across the room. He had been moping around for two weeks, and taking his frustration out on the drunken idiots who dared fight on his side of the bar. The Wednesday before, Gruber had had to pull Kody out of the heap. Hank had already spoken to him once, and I was afraid if he didn’t snap out of it soon, he was going to get fired.
Raegan glanced over at him, just for a moment, when she was sure he wasn’t looking.
“Have you talked to him?” I asked.
Raegan shrugged. “I try not to. He makes me feel like an ass**le when I’m not talking to him, so I’m not eager to start a conversation.”
“He’s upset. He loves you.”
Raegan’s face fell. “I know.”
“How are things with Brazil?”
Her face lit up. “He’s busy with football and Sig Tau, but there’s a Valentine’s date party. He asked me yesterday.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Oh. So it’s like . . . this is serious.”
Raegan pulled her mouth to the side, looked at Kody, and then looked down. “Brazil was my first love, Cami.”
I reached out and touched her shoulder. “I do not envy you. What a shitty situation.”
“Speaking of first loves . . . I think you’re his,” she said, nodding toward the entrance.
Trenton strolled in, a big smile on his face. I couldn’t help but match his expression. From the corner of my eye, I could see Raegan watching us, but I didn’t care.
“Hey,” he said, leaning forward against the bar.
“I thought you would be at the fight.”
“Unlike boyfriends in California, I have my priorities straight.”
“Very funny,” I said, but my stomach fluttered.
“What are you doing later?” he asked.
“Sleeping.”
“It’s really cold outside. I thought maybe you’d need the extra layer.”
I tried not to smile like an idiot, but I couldn’t help it. He was having that effect on me lately.
“Where the hell did Ray sneak off to?” Hank said.
I shrugged. “It’s fight night, Hank. We’re dead. I can handle it.”
“Who f**king cares where she is?” Kody said. His arms were crossed as he leaned his back against the bar. He was watching the near empty room with a frown on his face.
“Did you get that job?” Hank asked.
“No,” Kody said, shifting.
Hank put his hands on each side of his mouth in an attempt to amplify what he was about to yell, and then took a breath. “Hey, Gruby! Send Blia over here to cover for Raegan while she’s outside, would ya?”
Gruber nodded and walked toward the kiosk. I cringed, wishing Hank hadn’t reminded Kody and everyone else that Raegan was likely outside, talking to Brazil.
Kody’s entire face crumpled.
I felt bad for him. He hated the job he once loved, and none of us could blame him. Hank had even given him a good reference for the hardware store where Kody had applied.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I know it’s hard for you.”
Kody turned to look at me, a wounded expression on his face. “You don’t know shit, Cami. If you did, you would have talked some sense into her.”
“Hey,” Trenton said, turning around. “What the f**k, dude? Don’t talk to her like that.”
I motioned for Trenton to stand down, and I crossed my arms, ready for the full force of Kody’s frustration to blow my way. “Ray does what she wants, Kody. You of all people know that.”
His jaws danced under his skin, and he looked down. “I just . . . I don’t get it. We were good. We didn’t fight. Not really. Stupid shit about her dad sometimes, but most of the time we had fun. I loved spending time with her, but I gave her space when she needed it. She loved me. I mean . . . she said she did.”
“She did,” I said. It was hard watching him talk. He was leaning against the bar like it was hard to stand.
I reached across to put my hand on his shoulder. “You’re just going to have to accept that it doesn’t have anything to do with you.”
He shrugged away from me. “He’s just using her. That’s the worst part. I love her more than my life and he doesn’t give a shit about her.”
“You don’t know that,” I said.
“Yeah, I do. You don’t think the guys at Sig Tau talk, Cami? You don’t think they’re discussing your drama, too? They’re worse than the Cap Sig girls, sitting around gossiping about who’s f**king who. And then it trickles down to me and I have to hear about all of it.”
“My drama?” I glanced around. “I don’t have drama.”
Kody pointed at Trenton. “You’re racing toward it at ninety miles an hour. You shouldn’t mess with that, Cami. They’ve been through enough.”
Kody walked away, and I stood, stunned for a few moments.
Trenton made a face. “What the f**k is that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing,” I said. I kept my face smooth, pretending that my heart wasn’t trying to beat through my chest. T.J. and I weren’t exactly a secret, but we didn’t broadcast our relationship. I was the only one from our little town that knew the nature of his job, and it was important to him that we kept it that way. A little bit of knowledge led to questions, and avoiding questions meant keeping secrets. It really hadn’t been that big a deal because we’d never given anyone a reason to talk about us. Until now.
