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CHAPTER 1
I stand there flabbergasted, my jaw flapping in the wind. That can’t be true. Josh raped someone? A heavy daze settles on my shoulders making the world around me morph into a fishbowl. Everything sounds far away and warped. My head is too heavy and I find myself reaching for a kitchen chair. I barely graze it with my fingertips and lower myself, not blinking, still shocked.
“Kerry, whoa, what are you—” Nate steps toward me, but it’s too late.
It turns out said chair wasn’t lined up with said ass. I pass the cute seat where my posterior should have landed on my way down to the linoleum floor. Ooof. I let out a hard rush of air on impact.
Nate rushes, offering a hand. “Are you okay?”
When I don’t slip my palm into his, his crouch changes to a kneel. He places his hand on my shoulder. I want to cry or scream that Josh couldn’t do something so heinous. There’s no way. But he told me he did something horrible. I didn’t believe him.
I glance over at the sexy professor’s face. Nate is beautiful as always, but there are little worry lines around those cool blue eyes. The way he lingers close, waiting for me to respond—waiting to hear I’m all right—coupled with the confession of concern that lingers on his lips is way too intense. I didn’t want a relationship. I can’t handle another failure right now.
“Kerry?” Nate slides his knees around and sits on his back pockets, stretching those long legs out in front of him.
“Mmmm?”
“I know you care about this guy. I can tell from the way you’re talking about him and the sucker-punched expression on your face.”
I glance at him out of the corner of my eyes. “You’re not jealous?” I’m a little shocked that the question fell out of my mouth, but yeah, it’s weird. He’s not pissing all over his territory like a horn-dog.
“It’s not like that with us. You said so yourself. There’s nothing lasting about this.” He gestures between us. “As it is, it’s insanely dicey for you to be here. Some things are worth the risk.” Leaning in, he sweeps his lips against my cheek.
I stare straight forward and feel a rush of warmth flood through me. I’m in emotional overload. Fragments of my mind are cracking under duress and I no longer want to think about anything. That’s what this guy is for—that’s why I came here.
Nate’s lips linger next to my cheek, a breath away. I turn slowly and lower my lashes, to watch his mouth. I stay there, not moving for a long time, lost in silence. When I finally lean forward to close the distance, my heart is pounding at a deafening volume and every inch of my skin tingles, anticipating Nate’s touch.
Eyes fixated on his beautiful pink lips, I breathe, “Can you make me forget everything for a little while? I don’t want to think anymore.”
Nate answers by pressing his mouth to mine. At the same time, his hand laces around the back of my neck so he can pull me close. His other hand finds my cheek, and cups it as he kisses me harder. Thoughts scatter across my mind like a deck of cards in the wind. They’re no longer in a neat stack, easily read and pondered. Instead, they’re floating fragments that will soon be banished from my mind.
I concentrate on the way his mouth feels, on the touch of his tongue and the way he takes control of the kiss. I relax into him, letting him move me as he likes. A moment later, I feel my arm trembling and realize that I’ve leaned back and placed my hands behind me to prop my body up. I’m no longer able to support our weight, and before I can break the kiss to say so, Nate lowers me to the floor while keeping the kiss intact. His firm body comes down on top of mine, then shifts to the side while leaving one leg over my hips, knee bent, and pressing me to the floor. The coldness of the plastic tile against my back is jarring. I arch my back and gasp into his mouth as I tangle my hands in his hair.
Nate’s lips soon drift from my mouth to my neck. There’s not a thought in my head when his tongue touches that sensitive, smooth skin. Every time he kisses me there my eyes roll back and my lashes lower. I try not to moan, and then give up.
Nate smiles against my skin when I become vocal. He stops for a moment and pulls back enough to see my face. He’s breathing hard and hovering right above me. He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear as he speaks. “Don’t hide from me. Don’t hold back. Pretend there’s no tomorrow, no repercussions, no consequences.”
Pressing my lips together nervously, I listen, wondering if I can do that—a little frightened of what it would mean. I will see him tomorrow. There will be consequences.
It’s as if he can read my mind, because he adds, “This may be the last time we get to be together.”
That punches my ticket. I understand what that means. No more Nate is like no more freedom, no more sweet, fresh air to fill my lungs and no freeing wind at my back. The world is listless and stale without him, and yet that’s the way it is. We aren’t supposed to be together. He’s risking everything for this moment. His career will tank if someone discovers us. And my reputation will be torched. No one will believe I earned my grades—any of them. There will be sweeping assumptions that I screwed my way to the top, that I didn’t deserve it. I know the risk and yet I can’t walk away from him. I’m all too aware this could be the last chance we have to be together, and I don’t want to hold back.
I slip my fingers around his neck and pull him down on top of me. I don’t want him on the side. I want to be crushed to the floor. I want to feel his power, his strength. I want to be pinned in place and lose myself while he’s inside me. If this is our last time, that’s what I want. Clarity hits me hard and suddenly I’m all instinct and carnal urges. I’m writhing beneath him, spreading my legs wide, and bucking up into him wishing he’d free me from my jeans.
Breathless, I nip his neck as his hands rove my body. His hot mouth devours my neck as a lightness fills my body, making me smile. The bulge in his pants is hard and grinding against me, too many layers of fabric separating us. I don’t want anything between us. I want to be covered in sweat and Nate. My stomach twists at the thought of being tangled together with Nate, skin on skin, slick and sweaty with him driving into me until I lose every inch of restraint and cry out his name.
I slam my hands into his chest, and flip us over. I straddle his lap with my thighs spread wide and shuck my shirt and bra in a blink. Then, I stand and kick off the rest of my clothes. When I straddle his hips again I’m completely naked. And he’s not. He’s still dressed with a nude woman on his lap.
A coy smile tugs at the corners of my lips as I sit there, watching his gaze consume every inch of me. When he lifts his hands, ready to touch the soft curves of my breasts, I stop him, threading my fingers through his and slamming them down next to his head.
