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In a matter of seconds, her breathing evened out, her chest moving softly and slowly up and down as she let herself go and succumb to her sleepiness.
But I didn’t sleep.
I couldn’t.
Because every time I closed my eyes, all I saw was Ayla’s eyes becoming blank and her face twisting in pain. It was all I could see, and the thought of her being in this much agony drove me mad.
The rage fueled deep inside of me.
And I couldn’t wait to unleash it on the fucker who had hurt my Ayla.
***
Ayla
My head was pounding and all my muscles were aching. I felt languid as I blinked my eyes open and pressed my face harder into the pillow, trying to wrap my head around what happened yesterday.
Everything was a blur and it felt like I was missing pieces of puzzles. Rubbing my eyes, I turned around in bed to find myself alone. Alessio was already gone.
I realized I was completely naked, cold air on my bare chest, and the memories started to come back.
I couldn’t remember much after we’d started. Did Alessio notice? Had he kept going?
The thought almost choked me and a single tear fell down my cheek.
All I remembered was suddenly feeling peace as I fell asleep. Only a peaceful feeling had surrounded me.
I looked around the bed and didn’t see the jacket anywhere.
Falling back against the pillows, I cried softly when realization sank in.
Alessio…
It was him.
He had calmed me last night. He brought me back from the darkness.
I was still lost in my thoughts when the bathroom door open. My eyes widened and I sat forward in shock when Alessio came out, wearing a white unbuttoned dress shirt and black slacks.
His eyes met mine, and I saw him whisper my name. When he took a step forward, I grabbed the comforter up, hiding myself from him.
Alessio visibly swallowed hard and looked down, pinching the bridge of his nose as he did so. He took several deep breaths in and then stared up at me again. I ducked my head nervously, feeling ashamed that he had to see me in such a position last night.
I felt him coming closer and then the bed shifted under his weight. Closing my eyes tightly, my fingers tightened around the comforter.
“Here. Wear this,” Alessio said.
My nightgown was lying in front of me. I swallowed hard and trembled slightly when he knelt down, and with one hand, he pulled the comforter away, his movement gentle as he watched all my reactions carefully.
I had to stare up into his face and he quickly pulled the nightgown over my head and waited for me to put my arms through. Not once did he look away from my face. He didn’t even look down at my naked body.
Instead, he kept his eyes away, giving me respect.
Respect…something I never had in my life before. Yet Alessio was here, being gentle, sweet, and so considerate that it made my heart ache.
Keeping my eyes on his, I placed my arms through it and Alessio pulled the nightgown down the rest of my body, eventually covering my naked self from his eyes.
He slowly brought a hand up and gently moved my hair away from my face, pushing the strands behind my ears so that my face was fully visible to him. Alessio cupped my jaw and rubbed his thumb over my cheek and then under my eyes.
“Ayla,” he murmured, his eyes showing me raw emotions. I couldn’t look into his bluish eyes anymore.
I saw pain there. Anger. Desperation. Sadness. Grief. Heartbreak.
So I glanced away from his mesmerizing eyes. I looked away before I could see the disgust.
Because it should be there, shouldn’t it?
Why was he even touching me? Why was he being so sweet and gentle?
Wasn’t he disgusted by me?
Alberto’s words resonated in my ears and I closed my eyes tightly against the memories, trying to shut them out.
No man would ever want you.
Maybe he was right.
Who would want me?
Not after what Alberto has done. Not after he ruined me.
“Ayla, look at me. Don’t cast your eyes away like that.”
I shook my head and pulled away from me. “I need to use the bathroom.”
I needed to get out of there. Away from him, his sweet words and his understanding eyes.
“Ayla—” I shook my head again.
“Alessio, please,” I begged this time, my voice hoarse with tears. He sighed, letting my jaw go. I quickly got off the bed and walked out of his room on shaky legs.
As soon as I was in mine, I closed the door and went straight into my bathroom, swiping my tears on the way.
I didn’t look at myself in the mirror. Instead, I kept my eyes away from it as I brushed my teeth and washed my face, removing the evidence of my crying.
After changing into my uniform, I mechanically combed my hair, feeling strange and weak. After so long I have had a break down. I almost forgot how it felt.
