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Yet he still held incredible strength inside his bruised soul. If only he’d let himself free from the misery he seemed to force on himself.

After washing myself, I walked us out of the shower and picked up two towels before quickly drying us off. I even ran it over his wet hair, brushing all the excess water out. He closed his eyes, sinking into my touch.

After we were completely dried, we silently got in bed. Viktor never said a word. He watched me stitch the deep cuts, while applying bandages on the smaller ones after disinfecting them. I even applied some soothing salve to his purple and green bruises.

Some wounds were a few days old. Yegor told me Viktor had gone to the death-pit five times this week. He had forced his body into fighting more than he could take.

When I was done, I curled up at his side, pulling the bedsheet over our nakedness. He touched my cheek, sliding his finger up and then bumping the tip of our noses together. “I never want to wake up from this dream,” he whispered to me before closing his eyes.

“It’s not a dream,” I tried to say, but he didn’t open his eyes again. A few minutes later, his breathing evened out, and I watched him sleep. Even then, his eyebrows were furrowed, his expression tensed. I wished I could soothe away all his pain, but Viktor seemed to be keeping me at a distance.

Eventually, my eyes grew heavier and I was pulled under by sleep. When I woke up later, Viktor was thrashing on the bed. His skin was covered with a sheen of sweat and his forehead was creased angrily. His jaw clenched and he emitted a pained growl, coming right from his chest. His eyes were squeezed shut and I couldn’t bear it.

I couldn’t see him like this.

I couldn’t…

I just couldn’t.

Tears welled up in my eyes, I folded my hands over his fist. “Wake up. Please.”

“Valerie,” he whimpered. “Don’t fucking touch her!”

He sat up with a start, and I choked back a sob in response. His bloodshot eyes met mine and he stared at me. Shock. Pain. Tenderness. Lost. Admiration. There was deep torment in his dark eyes. Torment. Anger. And love.

How was it possible for him to look at me with so much heartbreak in his eyes, yet his gaze still be filled with so much love?

It was a tragedy to my heart.

“You—” he started in a rough sleepy voice. “What—”

He cleared his throat and shook his head, as if to clear his mind. Viktor looked down at my hands over his. “How…how are you in my room?” He looked so confused, blinking several times as if to get rid of this mirage that was me.

I squeezed his fist, giving him a small smile. “Yegor came to me. He said you were hurt. I couldn’t stay in that room anymore, not when I knew you needed me.”

“If Valentin finds out…”

I cut him off before he could continue. “He won’t. Yegor was able to sneak me out, and everyone is sleeping.”

Viktor shook his head in disbelief. “No, Valerie,” he hissed. “You shouldn’t be risking yourself like this and—”

His angry tirade of words was stopped when I placed a hand over his mouth. “You forgot. Valentin…he gave me to you.”

Saying the words had my cheeks burning, and I felt the redness spread down my neck and there was a warmth in my chest. “That means I am yours. He has no say in what I do anymore. His only request was that I don’t leave the estate. He never mentioned anything about me leaving my room. The only reason we decided that I should stay in my room was that it would safer and I would be away from Valentin’s eyes.”

Viktor still seemed unappeased by my words. “It’s okay, Viktor. No one can harm me. Not anymore. You’ve made sure of that.”

Viktor had sacrificed more than I could ever understand. For me. He was forced to make a choice.

His family…or me?

His brother…or me?

My Viktor was a soldier. A loyal warrior. He stood to protect his family, his people—standing on the right side of his King.

But a week ago, his loyalties were tested, and Viktor made a choice that broke the deepest part of him.

Viktor said to trust him.

He said he knew what he was doing.

But I saw his eyes. The anguish in them. The look of brokenness and failure.

Every day, I had to look into those beautiful eyes; the eyes that once held the sun were now a hollow darkness.

I knew he made a choice that he’d never forgive himself for. If only I could wrap my arms around him and protect him from all the suffering. Like his guardian angel. Like he had protected me since the day he laid eyes on me.

Source: www.allfreenovel.com
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