“I cannot control myself when it comes to you,” I breathed. “There is not a thing I would not do for you, nor anything I would not give you if you asked. But you are mine, and I want the entire world to know it.”
Eva closed her eyes, rocking her hips with mine until our movements stuttered. She detonated around me, every spasm of her muscles sending me toppling over the edge with her. We cried out, both of us clinging to the other under sweat-slicked skin.
She pulled me closer, forcing my body to collapse on top of hers. I laughed, unable to help myself as she let out a small breath of air from the sudden force. “We should clean up,” I whispered softly.
Eva made a noise of protest as I tried to pull away. “No,” she said, forming her face to a perfect pout. “I don’t want to move.”
I tapped her nose. “You don’t have to, darling. I can do all the work.” But still, she would not let me go. Instead, she clung to me as if she sensed something I did not. “Eva, what is it? What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know,” she whispered. “It’s irrational, but it feels like this world of ours will come crashing down as soon as you leave this bed, and I want to be ridiculously happy a while longer.”
Chapter26
Renai
“Kalen? Kalen!” I called after my friend over and over again, but his pace never relented. It didn’t help that my shoes were not created to run after men with obscenely long legs, and I soon took them off to try to keep up with him.
I’d known something was wrong from the moment I walked into the room to grab the men before the ceremony. Kalen was intoxicated, severely so if the scent wafting off of him was any indication, and he’d looked at me with cold eyes. The kind that made him look broken. It’d taken everything not to push him for answers, but storming out of the ceremony had crossed a line.
We hadn’t spoken since I told him my suspicions about Illara. I couldn’t explain why I didn’t trust her, and perhaps I should have kept my mouth shut until I knew what that was. But seeing the two of them together, laughing, it had pushed me out of the corner I’d been watching them from. He barely knew this woman, and yet there was something about her that drew him in.
Would I be forced to watch as they carried on and grew their relationship? I would let him go if that was what he wished, though a part of me would never get over the loss of our potential. I couldn’t let this ruin our friendship—it’d been one of the first things we’d agreed upon when we started sleeping together.
Kalen threw open the door to his room up ahead, and I followed in quickly behind him. He strode to the window, staring out over the darkening city below. Both of his hands were braced on the wall above, the moonlight emitting a silvery glow around his silhouette.
I leaned against the door, unable to stop myself from staring. Even if it was just a moment, and I knew there were other things I needed to do, I couldn’t get over his rugged handsomeness. He’d always played his looks up, and for good reason, but I often wondered if that playful demeanor was to stop others from looking too closely at him.
Because that was true sorrow emanating off of him in waves. It was sewn into the very fabric of who he was, who he’d become over the past century. It broke my heart because he wasn’t always this way. There was a time when he was vibrant and full of life, nothing could ever get him down. After Arabella, there was a dark shadow hanging over his head. He couldn’t escape it.
I’d only met her a handful of times. Back then, Kalen and I were traipsing throughout Aethion helping out with war efforts. She’d been kind, a bit crazy, like him, but they were completely in love. It was easy to see, and I’d been so happy for them, even though my own heart ached given what I’d experienced in the past. It wasn’t because of him, though. I was never jealous of Arabella because she was with Kalen.
Something was different about tonight, something that followed and haunted him more than before. The eerie silence stretched between us, and I stood, counting my breaths until his voice sounded from the other side of the room.
“I don’t remember inviting you to follow me here, Renai.” He didn’t move, his body rigid with tension. “So I’d appreciate it if you left me in peace.”
“Renai, huh? You only use my full name if I’m in trouble. Is that the case?”Come on, laugh, chuckle, something. Give me a sign and tell me what’s wrong.
Kalen said nothing.
I cleared my throat. “Alright then. No, I won’t leave you. You’re drunk off your ass with a horrible attitude and you just stormed out of your best friend’s wedding as if it was nothing. If you don’t want to explain to me, then you owe an explanation and an apology to him, but I’m staying until you’ve calmed down, and I know you’re alright.”
He scoffed. “I don’t have to explain myself.”
“You do if you choose to act like this. What happened?” I asked, striding across the room and plopping down in an armchair in the far corner. He was in my direct line of sight, and I saw his eyes roll as I crossed my arms over my chest.
“Did you ever stop to think that I don’t want to be bothered? That I want to bealone?” He turned to me, his blue eyes cold. “Or maybe I just don’t want to be around you?”
“Obviously not,” I snorted. “I’m excellent company. And even if that is the case, I’m not leaving you to your own self-destruction. Talk to me, tell me what’s wrong, and let’s fix this. Or we can sit in silence if you prefer.”
He pushed off the wall, his thick muscles flexing underneath his shirt. I gulped, watching as he turned the full force of his fury on me. I’d only seen him like this twice before. Once when he lost the babe, and the other when he found out Arabella was dead. But his anger had never been directed at me before.
“There is nofixingthis,” he hissed, leaning forward. “This is my life! It’s all one gigantic mess.”
“Then tell me what I can do to help!” I exclaimed, pushing out of the chair and approaching him. “I am right here. Tell me what you need and I will do what I can to make sure you get it. But Kalen, you need to let me in.”
He staggered back a step, holding his hand in front of him. “No. I don’t need anything from you. You’ve done enough.”
My heart stopped. “What do you mean? What have I done?”
