Page 65 of Before (After 5)


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“Tessa, I . . .” I have to tell her. My body is ripping itself into two pieces.

“Shh . . .” she whispers. She has no idea what she’s saying.

I feel the weight of my body on hers, such a perfect fit. I look over her face, trying to save this moment forever. “But, Tessa, I need to tell you something . . .”

“Shh. Hardin, please stop talking.” She’s begging me now. Her eyes are full of love and excitement. My life is changing, and right now, I’m going to change everything. She takes control before I can get a word out and presses her lips to mine. Her hand wraps around my hard cock, and she jerks me, tempting and hushing me. I inhale a sharp breath when her thumb swipes over the bead of precome on the tip.

“I’m going to come if you do that again,” I whine. I want to feel her delicate fingertips tracing over the head of my cock, teasing me, making me beg for more.

More than anything, I need to bury myself inside of her. Now.

I assume she doesn’t have any condoms and only feel slight shame that I always carry one out of habit. I have few rules when it comes to sex, but using a condom is a complete must for me.

Tessa is watching me from the bed as I gather my jeans off the floor and dig through the pockets. I feel like a pervert, carrying a condom around in my wallet in anticipation of fucking.

One look into Tessa’s eager eyes banishes that thought, and I climb back onto the bed, condom in hand. I wait a second for her to take the condom from my hand, but she doesn’t. No shit, Sherlock, she’s probably never seen one outside of Sex Ed.

“Are . . .” I don’t know how to ask her if she wants to try to put it on me. Some women like to, some don’t.

She raises her voice. “If you ask if I am sure, I will kill you.”

I believe her.

So I decide to go with option two, which is to cherish this moment while I have her. I shake my head and wave the condom in front of her. “I was going to say, are you going to help me put this on, or should I do it?” I would be quicker, I’m sure.

Tessa looks nervous as she chews on her lip. My cock is aching for her. I’m tempted to just fuck her without a condom.

I have to remind myself that that’s a stupid fucking idea.

“Oh. I want to . . . but you have to show me how.” She’s so shy and so damn sexy. Her tits, so heavy and round, are distracting me. I need to speed up this process.

“Okay,” I agree. Tessa scoots closer to me and crosses her legs. I’m happy to show her, but I’m only halfway in reality. Mostly I’m already on top of her, pushing into her. She’s moaning and clawing at my back and my arms. She’s begging for more, she’s coming and I’m claiming her.

“THAT WASN’T SO BAD for a virgin and a drunk,” Tessa teases when the deed is done and the condom is on. I remind her that I’m not drunk and explain that her sassy mouth has caused me to sober up.

“Now what?” she asks, genuinely wondering.

I guide her hand to grasp my cock. “Eager?” I ask her.

She nods her head.

“Me, too,” I say. I am eager, I’ve never wanted anything more. She’s still jerking me; my hardness is wrapped in her palm. I move between her legs and part them with my knee.

Once again, her pussy is glistening for me. “You’re soaking wet, so that will make it easier.” I can smell her again. She’s so responsive, and it drives me fucking mad. I kiss her mouth, dotting my lips against the corners of her soft lips, her nose, her mouth again. Tessa’s arms wrap around me, and I inhale as she presses me closer. I brush against her wetness and nearly explode. She’s impatient, pulling me closer.

I warn her. “Slow, baby, we need to go slow.” I kiss her temple. I don’t want to hurt her. I wouldn’t if I didn’t have to. “It’s going to hurt at first, so just tell me if you want me to stop. I mean it, okay?” I stare down at her. Her pupils are blown out, her cheeks flared, and her hair a wild mess across the pillow.

“Okay.” She swallows nervously. I stare at her, silently reminding her how much I love her, need her, cherish her. With a deep breath, I find her opening and push gently inside. Her tightness clings to every inch that I push through, and I stop when her eyes screw shut.

“You okay?” I ask, breathless. She’s nodding, her lips in a hard line. She’s so warm, so tight for me.

“Fuck,” I moan when she groans, tightening again.

“Can I move?” Fuck, I need to move. I knew she would feel like heaven, but I had no idea how fucking extravagant heaven would be.

She takes a few breaths before answering. “Yeah,” she agrees. I go slow, not wanting to hurt her. I can feel her easing up her grip on my arms with each kiss I give her. Her neck, her pretty mouth, her nose. I love every inch of her body. Every inch of my body.

I repeat to her how much I love her as I slowly draw in and out of her. Her eyes are still closed, but she’s not showing any unusual signs of discomfort. When twenty seconds pass and she hasn’t responded, I stop. “Do you . . . fuck . . . do you want me to stop?”

She shakes her head and I close my eyes again. I can picture every inch of her under me. Her smooth skin, her body molding to mine. She’s mine now and forever, even after we leave this bed. I maintain my pace, and she keeps her arms wrapped around me. I can feel my heart in my chest, pumping and coming alive as I climb closer to the edge. I’ve never felt anything during sex.

I feel alive and brilliant, and when I look down at my love, she’s looking back at me with radiant admiration, and I know now that somehow, everything will be okay.

Tessa’s strength surprises me again as a silent tear rolls down her cheek. I kiss it away and give her the praise she deserves. “Fuck, Tess, you’re doing so good, baby. I love you so much.” I push my fingers into her hair and suck at the sweat-coated skin of her neck.

“I love you, Hardin,” Tessa declares. That’s all it takes and I’m there.

I kiss at her mouth, licking at her lips and tongue with a feverish hunger. “Oh, baby, I’m going to come. Okay?” My spine is on fire, her skin is shining with sweat, we are wild.

Tessa nods, encouraging me to spill into her. In this moment, I have a hatred for the barrier between us. I want to fill her—I want to make her mine in every way. Her lips suck at my neck and I tense, my body giving in to the pleasure, and I spit her name through clenched teeth as I reach my climax. I lie on her chest, catching my breath, and she lazily caresses my skin.

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