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She dropped the items in her hand to the floor and cupped her own tits, circling both nipples with the pads of her thumbs before brushing them over the tips. Her eyelids became heavy and her lips parted.
And, for fuck’s sake, did he want to fuck her that very fucking second.
If she was any other fuck, he’d just unzip, turn her away from him, plant her palms on the mattress and fuck her from behind.
But she wasn’t.
Not even close.
And the deal was, if she got naked, so did he.
He just didn’t look forward to seeing her reaction when he did. He also didn’t look forward to her endless questions.
“Need another promise, beautiful.”
“It’s unfair to ask me now. I did my part.”
“Know it and I could stare at you forever, but need this from you now and promise I’ll explain at another time. Just not now, not today. Tonight’s just for us and by askin’ questions, it’ll no longer be only the two of us. It’ll bring other people into this room who I don’t want to share you with. Need you to not ask questions and, if you do, don’t get bent when I don’t answer.”
If he had fucked up any of his words, she didn’t correct him and he knew why when she whispered, “You’re scaring me.”
Her heart was probably trying to escape her chest the same as his was. “Not tryin’ to scare you, just prepare you.”
“Shade,” she breathed.
“Gotta hear the promise, beautiful. Askin’ you to give me that.”
“Okay, I promise, but I apologize in advance if I break that promise. Because of that, I also promise not to get mad if you ignore my questions because I couldn’t help myself.”
He only nodded because he was done talking. The time was here. He just needed to get it done.
He wanted to touch Chelle and for her to touch him. He wanted to feel her silky hair, her warm fingers, her soft skin against him. To experience her fully. Unlike behind the shed, unlike in the Subaru. To do that, he needed to shed his armor first, which were his clothes.
“Sit on the bed,” he forced up his closing throat.
“So it’s more like a striptease?” Her attempt at lightening the mood didn’t mask the worry on her face. And that was what it was. A deep-rooted concern. Not curiosity.
She perched on the end of the bed naked, waiting for him to be the same.
He ripped his shirt over his head and threw it behind him toward the chair, unsure if it even made it that far. He quickly unbuckled his belt, unfastened his jeans and shoved them down his legs. He stepped out of the pool of denim and glanced up at Chelle when he heard her suck in a sharp breath.
She was no longer sitting. Fuck no. She was on the move.
When she reached him, she said nothing.
Though, even if she had, he might not have heard it over the pounding in his ears.
It took everything in him to remain in place when she tentatively reached out and touched the top of the long, raised scar that started right below his left pec and stopped below his navel.
When she stepped back, she looked almost relieved. But it wasn’t the scar on his torso he’d been worried about her seeing. That was nothing. That was a war wound compared to the others.
The others he received when he was tied down while on his belly and gagged to muffle the screams.
Sometimes his hands were restrained at the small of his back. Sometimes to the headboard. And if he wasn’t a good boy, sometimes his ankles were tied to the footboard.
He squeezed his eyes shut for a second.
No. Not now.
He should just get dressed and end this between them. Before she saw everything. Before she looked at him differently. Before he saw the horror on her face.
As he turned to grab his clothes, what he heard made him go solid.
He glanced at her and saw her eyes filled with what he was trying to avoid and her hand clamped over her mouth, smothering the whimper.
The instant she realized her own reaction, she dropped her hand and tried to hide it all.
She couldn’t.
It was too late.
“How can I not ask questions?” She also couldn’t hide the anguish in her voice.
“’Cause I need you not to.” He needed her not to fall apart. Because if she did, he might. And if he did, then he was done. He would disappear into the dark and have a hard time escaping it. Right now, he was teetering on the edge of that pit.
She blinked a few times, the shine in her eyes apparent. She grabbed his arm and turned him around and he heard another sharp inhale. His name came out on the exhale.
“Gonna give you five minutes on this, then we’re done. Either you wanna stay or wanna go afterward. Gonna be your decision.”
