‘It’s early days, I know, and anything could happen with Theo. And I hope to God it does, but I also know that he would hate it if he could see you in that hospital every single day, not living the life he would like to be living himself.’
Lydia took a deep breath and quickly scanned the menu, narrowing down a starter and a main so she was ready when the waiter returned. ‘It’s like living in limbo,’ she explained. ‘He’s neither dead nor alive. And the worst thing is that every time I look at him, every time the nurses give me the look that says nothing has changed in the last twenty-four hours since I was there, I remember his face, looking at me, telling me he’d never want to be kept alive if that was all it was.’
Before Sally could reply, the waiter appeared and they reeled off their orders. When he’d gone on his way, Sally said, ‘I can’t even imagine what it’s like. But I guess it must be different for a mum than it is for us.’
‘How do you mean?’
‘I just think it must be harder. She gave birth to him, has seen him through thirty-one years of his life.’
‘I suppose you’re right.’ It was impossible to put herself in Anita’s shoes, she wasn’t a mother. ‘I think she hates me.’
‘I’m sure she doesn’t. I think she’ll calm down when she thinks about it rationally. You weren’t suggesting the doctors do nothing to help Theo, you were merely telling her what he would’ve wanted. I doubt it was a conversation he ever had with his mum.’
‘Sally?’
‘Uh-huh.’ She topped up both wine glasses.
‘Just for one night, do you think it would be okay to talk about something other than hospitals and my boyfriend?’
Sally grinned. ‘Now you’re talking. But first…’ She raised her glass. ‘A toast to Theo.’
‘To Theo.’ It felt right to do that. To acknowledge him, but then Lydia needed to relax in the company of her friend, she needed to chew the fat about mundane things – Gerry coming home from footy training and traipsing mud into the house, Sally’s mum taking up belly dancing which was, quite frankly, hilarious and had both of them in fits of laughter. And by the time they groaned over the dessert menus and declared they couldn’t fit another thing in, Lydia felt weirdly different.
Lydia ordered two doubles of Baileys with ice and they paid the bill so they’d be left alone for a while. ‘Imogen’s coming home in a fortnight.’ Lydia had received the final postcard – it actually said that at the top – from her sister that morning. It had the usual banter detailing how this time she was in Hong Kong where she’d met up with a friend from school; she was coming home to start her first proper job. ‘I can’t wait to see her.’
‘Does she know about Theo yet?’ She pulled a face. ‘Sorry, I know we’re not supposed to be talking about him tonight.’
‘It’s okay, kind of inevitable that all conversations lead back to Theo at the moment.’ She sighed and toyed with the stem of her wine glass. ‘I made Mum and Dad promise not to let it slip. This is the only time she’ll have a gap year and she was close to him, she’ll be heartbroken. I figured if there was no change then what was the point. I actually hoped he’d be awake by now.’ She harrumphed. ‘I thought it’d be like in one of those movies or TV dramas where the patient in a coma has been asleep for years or decades and then wakes up looking and sounding the same, able to remember everything. Silly, eh.’
‘It’s not silly.’
‘She’s coming straight here from Heathrow, and I’ll tell her everything. She’s got almost a fortnight before she starts her first job as a marketing assistant for an insurance company up in York. To be honest, I’m not sure how she’ll find it, being on UK soil, doing the normal things people do every day. She likes her freedom too much.’
‘I’ll bet your parents can’t wait to see her.’
‘They’re excited, for sure.’
‘Have your parents been to see Theo? I know they’re fond of him.’
Her parents had liked Theo from the moment they met. He was friendly without trying too hard, he was a gentleman and they’d seen how happy he made Lydia. Even when they’d been through stressful times, her parents had always given him the benefit of the doubt. ‘They think the world of him, but with him being in intensive care and them living quite far away, it’s not been easy to pop in. They’re also trying to keep a respectful distance, knowing how hard this must be for Anita.’ She sighed. ‘It’s not even as though they can have a good old chinwag with him, is it?’ Her attempt at a joke met with a tentative smile from Sally. ‘Do you know how hard it is to have a one-way conversation with someone?’
‘Not easy, I imagine.’ Sally knocked back the rest of her drink. ‘Come on, let’s get out of here. There’s a bar across the street, the one we haven’t been to in years. Let’s start there and see where the mood takes us.’
There was no room for argument because as Lydia finished her own drink, Sally had already put on her jacket and was physically pulling Lydia’s arm to lead her out of the restaurant.
They giggled their way across to the bar where Sally flew straight to the front of the queue and the bouncer she knew. ‘He plays footy with Gerry,’ she explained when the bouncer let them straight in ahead of girls in strappy heels and mini skirts who’d clearly been waiting in the cold much longer. ‘Cocktail?’ Sally asked, snaking her way through the crowds to the bar. It was amazing how such a teeny person could make people move aside like the parting of the Red Sea.
They got through three cocktails each – two espresso martinis and then something called a Porn Star, which was surprisingly tasty as well as potent. And they were about to move on when Lydia spotted her boss, Ian, and waved to him. He came over and introduced himself to Sally who took an instant interest. Clearly she was thinking of dreaming up some scenario that pushed them together but Lydia knew the signs so she got him talking about his pregnant wife and his toddler twins. He offered to buy them another drink and the only beverage Lydia would take was a long, tall glass of water.
‘This is Connor,’ he said when a stranger lingered long enough for Lydia to realise Ian knew him. She’d thought he was trying in a not so subtle way to simply muscle in on the conversation. ‘Connor is my brother-in-law.’
‘Nice to meet you, Connor,’ Sally yelled above the din before she saw a work colleague of her own and excused herself to say hello.
‘Lovely to meet you,’ Lydia told him as Ian was commandeered by a woman Lydia hoped was his wife, judging by the way she was touching his arse and standing so close they looked like conjoined twins.
‘They don’t get out much.’ Connor leaned closer and she felt the warmth of his breath against her ear. Not in a bad or creepy way.
‘I’ll say.’ Her boss and his other half were canoodling like a couple of teenagers.
