‘I’d better. Sally’s staying at mine tonight and the idea was that we could natter way into the night, not so I could hold her hair back because she’s drunk so much she ends up being sick.’ Lydia knew she’d better go onto water next herself or she’d be doing the same. She’d got carried away for the first time in ages.
Outside the cool air hit them, and although not freezing cold it was enough to make her shiver.
‘Didn’t you bring a jacket?’ he asked.
‘No. We got a taxi and it was lovely when we left.’ They could see the pub from where they were. ‘You don’t have to walk me all the way over, I’m fine, really.’
‘I will walk you there, until I know you’re with your friend. And then I’ll go.’
‘You don’t have to.’ Lydia registered they were sauntering along rather than walking at a normal speed.
‘Lydia, it was really nice to see you again.’
He’d stopped and his hands were on her upper arms, neither holding her away nor holding her too close. And then he moved in and her mind processed it. Should she pull away, say no? She should, she was still technically with someone. But then again, that someone had gone, hadn’t he? He’d gone far away; and not just as far as the east coast of England, but farther, somewhere way out of reach and she wasn’t sure she’d ever get him back again. With every day that passed, the likelihood became more and more unrealistic.
Before her mind could tie itself in knots at what she should do, his lips pressed against hers, soft, different, and it was natural to kiss him back. More than that, it was good. And Lydia didn’t know whether it was the alcohol, the moment, the stress of the last five months, or the fact that Theo would be taken away from her in a different way when he was transferred to the care home tomorrow, but just for a minute or two she allowed herself to indulge in what this was: a great first kiss.
*
Sally had seen Lydia kissing Connor across the street, from her vantage point at the window, but being the true friend she was she also sensed it was time to leave the second Lydia walked into the pub. Connor had already been spotted by some of his own friends and so it was easy for Lydia to sneak off without any awkward goodbyes, requests for phone numbers or anything pertaining to continuing their encounter at all.
They hailed a taxi almost straight away and neither said much on the way home. Lydia looked out the window the entire way, and apart from banding together as soon as they got in the door to enforce the water drinking that was necessary after a big night out, they’d both gone off to bed without the usual gossiping. Lydia was still awake three hours later, unable to get the thoughts of Connor and Theo out of her head, and no matter how much she reasoned with herself, it still felt as though she had cheated on the man she loved.
The next morning, without saying much at all, the girls found refuge in a favourite café and awaited a full English fry-up to settle their stomachs.
‘I think I’ve been pretty good in the last twelve hours,’ said Sally.
‘What do you mean?’
‘I mean, we didn’t gossip at all last night, which is very unlike us.’ Sally thanked the waiter when the plates were settled in front of them. They both began to tackle the meal of scrambled eggs, sausage, baked beans, mushrooms and tomatoes. ‘I didn’t mention Connor, or Theo, but as your best friend I think it’s time.’
Lydia couldn’t help but let a small smile escape. ‘Go on then. Hit me with it.’
‘You’re feeling guilty, aren’t you?’
‘For the kiss?’ She cut through a rasher of bacon and forked it up with a slice of mushroom. ‘I really do. I feel like I’m cheating on Theo.’
‘I can understand that.’ She contemplated what else to say as she cut into a juicy grilled tomato. ‘I can’t even begin to imagine what it’s like, Lydia. Your relationship has been taken away from you but you’re stuck, you’re not allowed to move on, you’re unsure whether you should.’
‘I think of how it would be for me if I’d had the accident, if I woke up and saw Theo with someone else.’
‘Do you think he will wake up?’ Sally shrugged apologetically. ‘I thought I’d ask the obvious question, but tell me to be quiet if you like.’
‘Nobody knows, nobody knows at all.’
Lydia and Sally got through at least half of their breakfasts before they spoke again when Sally asked, ‘Was he a good kisser?’
Lydia laughed. ‘Trust you to ask.’
‘Well, I want to know!’
‘It was a very good kiss.’ Better than she’d thought, she hadn’t wanted it to end. Because all the time she’d been kissing Connor she’d been back to a normal thirty-year-old girl, out on the town, having a good time.
‘Have you heard from Anita?’
‘She texted this morning to say they were on their way up to the care home. I assume Theo’s in an ambulance and she’ll follow. I think Grace was coming down to do the journey with her. I still can’t believe it. I agree the hospital is different now he’s on the general ward and he isn’t getting the attention he needs, but at the same time, what’s going to happen in a care home?’ She put down her knife and fork, unable to eat another thing. ‘Theo would hate to be shoved somewhere full of old people and left to rot.’
‘Do you think that’s what’ll happen?’
