“You’re drooling.” He reached a knuckle under her chin to close her gaping mouth.
“It’s been a while.”
“Felt like a lifetime. Where are we going?”
“We could walk to my place? Or yours? Talk on the way?”
The warmth of his palm against hers spread into her chest as they walked in silence.
“I’ve missed you.” She slowed to a stop, tugging on his arm so he’d look at her. “More than I realized was possible to miss someone.”
His sad smile encouraged her to keep going, without saying a word.
“I don’t know where to start.” She walked toward him, faltered, and stepped back. If she touched him, it would be game over, there’d be no words, and she needed to use her words. “The guys came to the coffee shop the other night.”
He groaned and covered his face with his free hand.
“Don’t be mad at them. They weren’t trying to make me feel bad – they were worried. I guess they figured if anyone could get you out of bed, it would be me. Kind of ironic really since usually I’m the one dragging you into bed.” She snorted and twisted the hem of her shirt. Fuck, this was hard. “Anyway, I came over, but you were talking to your dad. Russ offered to let me stay, but I didn’t want to intrude, so I just dropped off the casserole and left.”
“You made the casserole?”
She nodded.
“I thought my dad made it, and he didn’t correct me. In fairness, if I’d known you were in the vicinity of the dorms I’d have run after you.”
“I’d venture your dad knew that. Did you work stuff out with him?”
Linc nodded. A car drove past, the sidewalk almost vibrating with the bass pumping from the under lit vehicle.
“Lincoln, I’m sorry. I freaked out. I got overwhelmed and I lost my damn mind. I know they’re all excuses, and none of them make up for me being shitty to you, and pushing you away, but I’m sorry. As soon as you walked away from my door, I…” Tears welled in her eyes, and she blinked them back, shaking her head.
“I know I had no right to be upset. I said the words. I threw on the brakes, but…” She swallowed. “I hated every minute of the last week. I’m tired of being apart.”
Reaching out a steady hand, he brushed tears from her cheek with the pad of his thumb. She turned into his open palm, enjoying the sparks dancing along her skin from the contact. Sighing, she closed her eyes. “I wasn’t sure this would ever happen again.”
“You think I’d just give up that easily?”
“You were pretty hurt that I was pushing you away, Lincoln. I wouldn’t have blamed you.”
“It troubles me how you think I could just walk away… from you… from us. This isn’t a fling to me, Cleo.”
She squeezed her eyes shut, willing the tears to stop.
“And I wasn’t lying when I said I was in love with you. Idolove you, Lizzy.”
Pinching her lip between her teeth, she shook her head. “I don’t know why.” Her words burst out on a hiccupping sob.
She’d spent so many years hating herself, that being faced with the idea that someone like Lincoln could love her sucked the breath from her lungs.
She detested herself for how she looked, for never being enough, for always needing to stay in line, always chasing one more A to be worthy… worthy of her parents’ love… of her own. So much self-loathing and self-doubt shrouded any compliments she’d ever received, or positive thoughts she’d had.
“I don’t think people ever really need to know why someone loves them, but you do have to work on accepting the fact I do.” He slipped the hand cupping her face behind her head and drew her to him, wrapping his arms around her in a tight embrace. “I’ll tell you every day for the rest of your freakin’ life until you hear me, Cleo. You’re beautiful, inside and out, and I love you.”
This man had seen her naked, both physically and emotionally. He’d seen the parts of her she’d never been brave enough to show anyone else, and he hadn’t run. In fact, he’d run toward her, unrelenting, and was always encouraging her to stop running away from herself. Her eyes fluttered open, and she swallowed hard. “I love you, too, Lincoln.”
He stepped back, but leaned his forehead against hers, their noses brushing against each other. “I’m so glad.” His breath tickled her face. “It woulda been super awkward if you didn’t love me back.” Holding her gaze, he slipped his hands onto her hips, then up her ribcage and around to her shoulder blades.
He brushed his nose across hers, once, twice, and before he could do it a third time, she rolled onto her toes, pushing herself up to close the space between them, and kissed him.
