Chapter Thirteen
‘Oops, sorry, I could have told you the midwife would want a wee sample from you.’ Flick looked at Lisa, the laughter evident in her eyes.
‘Well, I couldn’t go on command. It was embarrassing. Even the dogs I look after are better trained than I am.’
‘What? They wee on command?’
‘Yes, dogs are clever like that if they’ve been trained—’
‘Well, this isnot the conversation I was expecting at my last Jiggle and Sing before I go back to work.’ Melissa leaned down to Bella, who was sitting between her feet, and refastened the hair slide that had slipped down the silky threads of her too-long fringe. Welcoming her mum’s attention, Bella gave a dribbly grin, showing all of her five milk teeth, before returning her attention to attempting to reach Fred’sThomas the Tank Engine.
The official jiggle and sing part of the morning being over, Lisa, Felicity and Melissa were sitting with a cup of tea in hand while Bella and Fred played with an array of toys that reminded Lisa of the jumble-sale toys her Granny Blake used to get for her when she was a child. The day she realised her mum had been lying when she told her the toys always had to go backat bedtime was still ingrained in her memory. With the hindsight of adulthood she could see why the slightly grubby offerings weren’t up to her mum’s standards, but still the image of the bouncy hopper she had loved for a full six hours meeting an untimely end in the jaws of the dustcart stayed with her.
‘Normally, it’s the children’s toilet habits that fill the conversation—’
‘Especiallysince Fred’s started potty-training,’ Flick interjected.
Lisa grimaced. ‘Sorry, it’s just it’s all so new to me—’
‘Don’t be silly,’ Melissa reassured her. ‘I was joking. Bella’s not one yet; I remember how I felt when I went to my first appointment. I was terrified the pot of wee was going to come open in my bag on the way. I wrapped it up so much that when I got there, undoing it waslike pass the parcel.’
Lisa laughed so as not to reveal the things she had been scared of – talking about her previous miscarriage, and the fact the midwife said they’d leave listening to the heartbeat until her next appointment, as it was probably too early to hear it.
‘As it happened, the pot coming open in my bag would have been the least of my embarrassing pregnancy stories.’
‘Oh no. Really? Why, what happened?’ Lisa looked at Melissa, eyes wide.
Felicity bit her lip, clearly knowing how this story ended.
‘Lets just say it involved—’
‘Wait.’ Felicity sat forward. ‘Do you need the potty, Fred?’
‘No, Mummy.’
‘Then why are you dancing?’
Fred shrugged and Felicity sat back in her seat. ‘OK.’
‘It involved a family dinner at Adam’s mum’s, a babysitting on my bladder, and the fact I had a cold.’
‘Oh no.’ Lisa sat anticipating the end of the story.
‘Yep! I sneezed and—’
‘Uh-oh, potty, Mummy.’
All eyes turned to Fred as he stood, a dark patch spreading on the front of his beige corduroy dungarees.
‘Oh, Fred, you’re supposed to tell Mummy before you do it.’ Felicity tucked her tea out of the reach of little hands andpicked up the potty concealed in a carrier bag under her chair and Fred’s Thomas the Tank Engine rucksack before leading a slightly soggy Fred off to the baby change room.
Melissa nodded her head. ‘And that’s pretty much what happened. In the lounge. In front of Adam’s parents! Can you imagine?’
Lisa shook her head, not wanting to imagine and hoping that never happened to her.
WhenFelicity returned, Fred was trundling along at her side, wearing a slightly too short pair of tracksuit bottoms. ‘Note to self, remember to check the clothes in the spare bag are still in the size your child is wearing. Oops, look at him, poor love.’
‘He could audition forOliver.’ Melissa laughed.
