The mention of Rory’s name makes my heart flip a few times with delight. In a flash I am inundated by memories of Felix telling me how much help Rory had given him with his dance passion, Tom telling me all about the support he’s given my business and Tom’s admission Rory was struggling to date women because of me. I know what I said about us having to move on because Rory has, but I still love him. You wouldn’t believe how much my love intensified for him when I saw those ballet shoes and the note. I wished we had seen him in Leeds.
Felix glances at me before taking out my iPad from his rucksack. ‘We can message people from the iPad, and you can access your emails from it too.’
I stroke his hair. ‘Felix, have I told you lately how fab I think you are?’
He chuckles and opens Facebook.
‘What are you doing?’ I whisper.
‘Having a look at what Rory is up to.’
I try to take the iPad away from Felix but he’s too quick. ‘Give me that back. We’re not going to torture ourselves anymore about Rory. He’s moved on.’
Felix eyes narrow. ‘Trust me, Emily, I know what I am doing.’
‘You’re nine years old and you shouldn’t be on Facebook.’
He sighs. ‘I have been on Facebook for years. Mum never knew about me going through her Facebook albums and secretly deleting all the embarrassing photos of me which she had uploaded. She didn’t understand that the mums of my school friends were on Facebook too and used to show their children those photos of me dressed as an Easter chick and a garden gnome.’ Vivi’s choice of dressing-up outfits for Felix when he was young always made me smile. I watch him tap onto Beth’s profile.
Placing my hands over my eyes I turn away. ‘Please don’t tell me what Rory and Beth have been up to. I don’t want to know or see any romantic photos of them in matching Christmas jumpers sitting by a log fire.’
Felix gasps and I jump out of my skin. Removing my hands, I stare down at the iPad screen. Felix points to Beth’s post which consists of a quote about how good it feels to be single again. We both scan the comments like hawks watching for small, furry prey.
‘Their date ended in disaster,’ says Felix, pointing to Beth’s reply to one of her friends. He gasps for a second time. ‘Look, Emily, Beth went out on her own last night which means she wasn’t with Rory.’
I stare at the photo she’s been tagged into. It is a photo of her and her girlfriends from last night all wearing minuscule Santa dresses and stilettos, and holding up champagne flutes. My heart breaks into a wild gallop. ‘Rory and Beth’s date ended in disaster.’
Felix punches the air above his head. ‘I knew everything would be all right.’
‘Well, if he’s not with Beth – where is he?’
‘Can I have a hot chocolate?’ Felix tugs me on the arm.
The queue for the buffet carriage gives me a chance to gather my thoughts. Felix is guarding our seats, our belongings and Baxter.
With regard to Rory, so far I have managed to ascertain he has been on three dates but not slept with any of them – and in large part that seems to be because he keeps calling them by my name. Fireworks shoot across my chest in celebration. Through Facebook and Felix, I now know that Rory and Beth’s date ended badly yesterday and by the sounds of it, things didn’t go to plan. If Rory isn’t with Beth – then where the hell is he?
Maybe he’s gone to see his mum in the Caribbean? Although Tom would have mentioned something like that, and I sensed Tom had no idea where Rory was either. Perhaps he’s gone to visit his dad who he doesn’t talk about much? The one who lives with his wife in a travelling burger van. Rory hates burgers so I can’t see that happening and he has never had a good word to say about his father.
The woman in front of me shakes her long, raven coloured hair and Anna’s face appears in my mind. Perhaps he’s gone to be with Anna? That must be it. He and Anna were so close in the weeks leading up to Vivi dying. I remember listening to Rory talking about the great time he had with Anna one evening over dinner. His face seemed to light up when he spoke about her. There were also all the shared memories they had from someone they both knew at university. Maybe Rory has realised he has feelings for Anna and has gone to tell her. My stomach gets ready to perform a nausea-inducing swan dive for the train carriage floor when I remember Felix’s comment from yesterday about Anna. I am sure Felix mentioned something about Rory and Anna only being friends. Why do all roads seem to lead to Felix?
I manage to carry Felix’s hot chocolate, my latte and two Twix bars back to our seats without spilling anything.
‘Yesterday you said something about Anna, Felix.’
Baxter has climbed onto Felix’s lap and is being cuddled. Felix looks up at me and smiles. ‘Yep.’
‘Once again, Felix, I’m sensing you know more about Anna than I do.’
Stroking Baxter’s velvety ears Felix shoots me a mischievous grin. ‘Anna’s mum was my ballet teacher. Rory’s brother was taught by her too.’
‘Rory has a brother?’ My voice has a loud shrillness to it which makes the family opposite stop singing their dire version of Little Donkey and stare at me. Ignoring them I turn to Felix. ‘I thought Rory was an only child. He’s never mentioned a brother to me.’
Felix shrugs. ‘He never told me either. I only know because my ballet teacher told me when I first joined her class.’
‘Do you know his brother’s name?’
‘Lawrence, that’s what she told me.’
