With a wry smile Emily leans over and puts her chin on his shoulder. ‘As long as they don’t involve running away, train journeys and my credit card. Oh, Vivi, when we get home, I am going to sort Felix out a new carpet.’
Felix giggles and puts his hand over his mouth. ‘Mummy, Emily doesn’t like your purple carpet either.’
‘Vivi, I love you but your choice of carpet for Felix is questionable.’
‘Mummy, Rory never came home so we are on our way back to Brighton.’
Hugging Felix, Emily presses her lips into his hair. ‘We’re okay, you and me, and that’s what matters. Things are going to be different when we get home.’
Felix cups his hand and whispers, ‘Shall I tell Mummy my secret?’
Emily smooths down his chaotic hair. ‘Felix, tell her in your own time. There’s no rush. I know how much it means to you. Anyway, she might be looking down on you so she may know already.’
‘What’s your funniest memory of Mummy, Emily?’
With a chuckle Emily secures a piece of her hair behind her ear. ‘Vivi, I’m sorry about what I am going to say but the funniest memory has to be when you liked a lad from this farm. Felix, your mother must have been about sixteen, seventeen maybe and she had a crush on a young lad who worked on his family farm. She would make me drive her up to this farm on a Saturday so she could work alongside this lad. One Saturday she persuaded me to come with her and help muck out the pigs.’ Emily starts to giggle. ‘We were mucking out the pigs when this lad came past in a tractor. Your mum started waving frantically to him and in her excitement, she fell over backwards and landed in a huge pile of pig poo.’ Felix erupts into hysterics.
‘There was pig poo in her hair and on her jeans. I laughed so hard I couldn’t breathe.’
He turns to the camera. ‘That’s funny, Mummy. You must have needed a bath.’
‘No matter how many times she washed her hair she couldn’t get the smell out.’
He looks up at Emily. ‘Did the farm boy ask Mummy to be his girlfriend?’
Emily shakes her head. ‘Sadly not, as your mum admitted she hated working on a farm because it ruined her glittery nails. Sorry, Vivi, you must be getting ready to fire lightning bolts at me now. It was very funny at the time.’
Felix holds up the camera to his face. ‘Mummy, while we were eating breakfast Emily told me and Tom all about the time when you both had to live in a forest. It must have been very scary.’ He rests his head back against Emily. ‘Luckily you had Emily to look after you.’
Emily sighs and blinks away hot, stinging tears. ‘It was a long time ago.’
‘Did you watchBear Gryllsbefore you went to the forest?’
She shakes her head. ‘No, Bear Grylls wasn’t on TV back then. I used to read a lot of books about children having adventures when I was little.’
‘You kept Mummy safe,’ says Felix quietly. He looks up at her. ‘Yesterday when I was on my own on the train and feeling scared, I thought about how you make me feel safe.’
Hugging him she kisses his head. ‘I will always keep you safe.’
‘Mummy, we’re going to go now. Bye for now.’
‘Bye, Vivi. Love you.’ Emily blows her sister a kiss and Felix kisses the phone screen.
CHAPTER40
EMILY
Ared-haired woman wearing an eye-catching, elven green dress with silver bead embroidery walks down the carriage. I am drawn to its pleated skirt and the intricate floral bead design. My heart beats faster and I fight the urge to stop this woman and ask her who made her delightful dress. It is handmade and pieced together with remarkable precision.
Felix cuddles Baxter in his lap and taps me on the arm. ‘How are things going to be different at home?’
A cloud of heavy sadness floats over me and chases away all my excitement over dressmaking. I can’t continue with Forever Vintage when we get home. I got so obsessed with it that I neglected Felix. With a gulp I grip onto the table and try to resist a hot tidal wave of emotion building inside of me. I can still carry on making dresses but perhaps return to sewing in my spare time. Even though I got carried away with my business and ended up working day and night, the whole process gave me so much pleasure: sewing hems and diamond seams, giving sleeves their puff back, cutting up different fabrics, pinning garment shapes, listening to the steady whirr of my sewing machine, mending waist ties, belts, delicate lace wrap tops, and adding buttons, beaded bow pocket details and tiny ribbons. I even loved the planning stage, deciding how a dress was meant to look and what work was needed to restore it.
A memory of Vivi and me dressing up in our mother’s old cocktail dresses comes back to me. Vivi would have a school disco to go to and we would go through a lengthy process of creating something fabulous for her. With our mother over at her lover’s house we would climb deep into her vast wardrobe and take out the many cocktail dresses she’d stuffed at the back.
Before she met our father, she worked on the cruise ships as a jazz and cabaret singer. Her days were spent travelling the world on luxurious cruise ships and entertaining hundreds of passengers with her expressive smoky voice. Everything changed for her when she met Dad while singing and fell pregnant with me. Her singing days ended, and she found herself living in a two-bedroomed terraced house on the outskirts of Brighton, penniless, with two small children, a husband who had left her to find himself in India and little hope of ever returning to her glitzy cruise days.
Her old evening dresses used to render me speechless when we dragged them out into the light. Vivi used to say I would slip into a trance as we would parade around in beautiful, fancy dresses. Once Vivi had decided which dress she wanted to use for her disco outfit I would get to work with my old sewing machine which the old lady down the street had given me after I’d told her about my love of making dresses. She also gave me a few lessons in return for me sweeping up the leaves in her garden.
