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p; She wipes the tears from her face. “Someone wrote whore on her locker. ”
Logan runs both hands over his face while Chris swears. The nightmare has already begun.
I SEARCH THE HALLWAYS for Beth and I come up empty. The first warning bell rings and from the opposite end of the hallway Lacy shakes her head. Dammit. They can’t find her either. Logan taps my shoulder. “She just walked into class. ”
Finally. I take off down the hallway and step into class right when the tardy bell rings. Lacy, Chris, and Logan trail behind me. Chris claps my back and the three of them head for our seats. Someone shushes the whispering and laughing as everyone watches me. I study
Beth. She’s reclaimed the seat in the corner of the room instead of the one she took next to me weeks ago.
Just like the first day of school, Beth’s hair hides her face and she doodles in her notebook.
My ribbon no longer graces her wrist.
An adult I don’t know clears her throat. We must have a sub today. “Do you mind taking your seat?”
Beth glances up at me, then immediately looks back down. It’s as if I swallowed knives.
She’s heard the rumors and she believes them.
Perfection. It’s what everyone expects from me. Take my seat. Do my work. Go to practice.
Play ball. Keep everything bottled up and let your insides rot as long as the outside looks perfect. “Beth. ”
She keeps her head down and the substitute steps into my line of view. “Either find a seat or find yourself in detention this afternoon. ”
“Ryan,” Chris says. “The game. ”
The game against Northside. I promised Chris I wouldn’t miss another game and detention would bar me from keeping that promise. Reluctantly, I take my seat and turn to stare at Beth, willing her to look at me.
“We’ll catch her after class,” Chris whispers to me from across the aisle.
THE BELL RINGS and it’s a race of who can get out of their seat faster. Beth is out the door first and her size makes it possible for her to duck and weave through the mass of bodies crowding the hallway. My next class is in the opposite direction of where she’s headed, but I don’t care.
She runs down the history hallway and I grab her arm right before she enters the safety of the classroom. I lean in and look straight into her eyes. “You know I love you. ”
Her eyes search my face and she appears as broken as she did two days ago at the hospital.
“Did you fuck me to win a dare?”
I fight the urge to shake her. “I didn’t fuck you, I made love to you. Don’t do this, Beth.
Don’t take what was beautiful between us and make it ugly. ”
Water fills her eyes and my heart slices into a million pieces. Beth isn’t a crier and I’m making her cry. I thought making love would prove how much I loved her. Prove that she could trust me, and it’s killing me to know that one act could be what’s tearing us apart. “I gave you my word that the dare was over.
When have I ever lied to you?”
“On the front steps of Scott’s house you promised me I wouldn’t be a secret. ”
I’m standing here breaking the PDA rules by holding her close to me. How can she believe I lied? “I’ve told everyone at school. I’ve brought you to games. I’ve taken you to parties. ”
“Tell me you told your parents. Tell me that when your parents confronted you about us, you told them we were a couple. ”
My grip on her loosens and she jerks her arm away. How could she know that? Over Beth’s shoulder I spot Gwen skulking at the end of the hallway. She glances at me, then immediately averts her gaze. Dammit.
Beth kneads her eyes with her hands. “I fell for the jock again. The worst part is I told you how to play me. Convince me you love me and I’ll fall into your bed. I’m so fucking stupid. ”
The warning bell rings and I watch in shock as Beth turns. No. She can’t believe that. “I do love you. ”
