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I shouldn’t do it. If I mess this up, I could tick off Scott Risk; but then again, if I work this right, I could have Scott Risk eating out of the palm of my hand. He all but begged me to become friends with the spawn of Satan over there. Plus, if I walk away from this opportunity, it means I lost and I don’t lose.
“Fine,” I say. “Dare accepted. ”
Game on, Skater Girl. Game on.
Beth
I NEED A CIGARETTE and a smoker who will trust me. Unfortunately, I haven’t come across either of those in my four hours of living the teen version of Deliverance. From a distance, while the juniors and seniors head to lunch, I follow two guys with long hair and sagging jeans. I hope I can convince one of them to give me a drag.
They round a corner and I give them a sec. If I approach before they light up, they’ll try to act cool like they aren’t doing anything. Then there will be nothing I can say to convince them I won’t snitch.
Hell, I wouldn’t believe me. The new girl in a white button-down shirt.
I’ve given them long enough. I turn the corner, prepared to tell them to chill, but the words catch in my mouth. They aren’t there.
It’s a short hallway with double doors leading out. I hurry to the window and watch as the two guys duck and weave through the parking lot. My head smacks the door. Damn. I never thought they’d skip. First day. That’s hard-core.
At the sound of a knock, my heart kicks out of my chest and with one glance out the window it melts. It’s him. My body sags with relief. It’s really him. I press the door open and the moment the warm summer sun caresses my face, Isaiah gathers me into his arms.
Normally, I wouldn’t do this—touch him so aware. Today, I don’t mind. In fact, I bury myself in him.
“It’s okay. ” Isaiah kisses my hair and his hand cradles the back of my head, keeping me close. He kissed me. This embrace should bother me and I should push him away. We don’t connect like this. Not sober. Today, his touch entices me to hold him tighter.
“How did you know?” I mumble against the material of his shirt.
“Figured you’d come out for a smoke at some point. This is the only place anyone has been doing it. ”
His heart has a strong, steady rhythm.
There were times, in my search for weightlessness, that I pushed too hard. Drank too much. Inhaled more than I should. Became physical with guys who were no good for me. I would go beyond weightlessness as a balloon on a string that had been snapped—left alone in a frightening abyss. With one touch, Isaiah could ground me. Keep me from floating away with his arms as my anchor. His steady beating heart the reminder he would never let go.
With reluctance, I put space between us.
“How did you know I’d be at this school?”
“I’ll explain it to you later. Let’s go before we get caught. ” He holds his hand out to me.
“Where?” I play along, knowing what my answer will be. I want the fantasy—if only for a second.
“Wherever you want. You once said that you wanted to see the ocean. Let’s go to the ocean, Beth. We can live there. ”
The ocean. The scene comes alive in my mind. Me in a pair of old faded jeans and a tank top. My hair blowing wildly in the breeze.
Isaiah with his hair buzzed short and shirt off, his tattoos frightening the tourists as they stroll by. I’ll sit barefoot on the warm sand and watch the crashing waves while he watches me. Isaiah always keeps his eye on me.
I wrap my arms around myself and clutch the hem of my shirt to prevent myself from grasping him. “I can’t. ”
He keeps his arm extended, but the weight of my words causes it to waver. “Why not?”
“Because if I run away, if I break Scott’s rules, he’ll send my mom to jail. ”
Isaiah’s hand clenches into a fist and his arm drops to his side. “Fuck him. ”
“My mom!”
“Fuck her, too. In fact, why were you even with her Friday night? You promised me you’d stay away from her. She hurts you. ”
“No, it was her boyfriend. Mom would never hurt me. ”
