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He started to laugh. She dropped his arm and shoved him hard. The box of novels fell, scattering paperbacks into the road.
He looked down at them and then back at her. "Fucking bitch," he said and spat on the ground.
All the rage and bewilderment of the last day boiled up in her. Her hands balled into fists. She wanted to hit something.
Dave bent down to pick up the cardboard box and replaced the fallen books. "You're lucky you're a girl," he muttered.
Chapter 4
We must not look at goblin men, We must not buy their fruits: Who knows upon what soil they fed Their hungry thirsty roots?
—Christina Rossetti, "Goblin Market"
On the train ride back, Val sat in a plastic seat far from Dave, leaned her head back against a Plexiglas-covered map of the subway, and wondered how a person could have hooves. She'd seen shadows move on their own and bottles of brown sand that had something to do with make-believe gossip about murdered tree people from weird, Upper West Side ladies. What she did know was that she didn't want to be blind and dumb, the kind of girl that didn't notice that her mom and boyfriend were having sex until she saw it with her own eyes. She wanted to know the truth.
When Val got close to the concrete park on Leonard Street she saw Luis sitting on a ledge, drinking something out of a blue glass bottle. A bird-boned girl with mismatched sneakers and a swollen belly sat beside him, trembling fingers holding a cigarette. As Val got closer, she could see sores on the new girl's ankles, leaking pus. The streets were nearly deserted, the only person close by a security guard across the street who walked out to the curb every now and then before she disappeared into the building.
"Why are you still around?" Luis asked, glancing up at her. She was unnerved by the stare from his cloudy eye.
"Just tell me where Lolli is and I won't be," said Val.
Luis gestured with his chin to the grate in the ground as Dave walked up to them both.
The girl dropped her cigarette and then reached for it, her fingers grazing the hot end without her seeming to notice as she fumbled to put it back in her mouth.
"What did you do?" Luis asked Dave, his jaw tightening. "What happened?"
Dave looked at the parked cars that lined the street. "It wasn't my fault."
Luis closed his eyes. "You are such a fucking idiot."
Dave said something else, but Val had already started walking toward the service entrance, the grate that she and Dave had slid out of that afternoon. She got down on her hands and knees, pulled up the unhinged end of the metal bars, and lowered herself onto the steps.
"Lolli?" she called into the darkness.
"Over here," came the drowsy reply.
Val waded across the mattresses and blankets to where she'd slept the night before. Her backpack wasn't where she'd left it. She kicked aside some of the dirty clothes on the platform. Nothing. "Where's my bag?"
"You trust a bunch of bums with your stuff, I guess you get what you get." Lolli laughed and held up the knapsack. "It's here. Chill."
Val unzipped her pack. All her stuff was inside, the razor still choked with her hair, the thirteen dollars still folded up in her wallet right beside her train ticket. Even her gum was still there. "Sorry," Val said and sat down.
"Don't trust us?" Lolli grinned.
"Look, I saw something and I don't know what it was and I'm done getting fucked with."
Lolli sat up, hugging her legs to her chest, eyes wide and smile stretching even wider. "You saw one of them!"
The image of the goat-footed woman moved uneasily behind Val's eyes. "I know what you're going to say, but I don't think it was a faerie."
"So what do you think it was?"
"I don't know. Maybe my eyes were playing tricks on me." Val sat down on an overturned wood tangelo box. It made a cracking sound, but supported her weight. "That doesn't make any sense."
"Believe what you can handle believing."
"But, I mean—faeries? Like 'clap if you believe in faeries'?"
