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Her palms flattened against his chest and she stared up at him. “I told you one of us would get hurt,” she murmured. “I didn’t want this to happen.”
“The hurt or the intimacy?”
Jax couldn’t help himself. He brushed a strand of hair over her shoulder and slid his fingertips over her collarbone before dropping his hand. She shuddered beneath his touch and only solidified what he already knew.
“I didn’t want any of it,” she admitted. “I knew how this would end and it’s not good and here we are both miserable. But I have to go, Jax. I can’t stay here. Haven isn’t my life and if I stayed, I’d always wonder if I’d given up my dream. How can I trust what we have would be permanent?”
“So you’d rather play it safe?” he countered. “You’d rather just let your fear guide your life? That’s not how I work, Livie, so if that’s how you want to live, then it’s best you go.”
As much as those words hurt to say, they were one hundred percent accurate. He wouldn’t want to be with a woman who was afraid to take risks. Life was all about risks and he’d wanted to take the ultimate one with her.
Her fingers curled into his shirt and she bit down on her bottom lip. He’d slay any demons for her, but right now, she was on her own.
“I have to go,” she whispered.
Jax knew in that moment, he’d lost her. She’d made up her mind and just like his ex-wife, he and his daughter were not a top priority. He was done fighting for this, for them.
He reached down and picked her up, carefully settling her against his chest. When her arms looped around his neck and her head rested on his shoulder, he said nothing as he carried her to his truck.
Call him a glutton, but he was going to relish these last few moments of her in his arms. Even though she wasn’t leaving for two weeks, he knew in his broken heart there would be no more times of intimacy. Once he took her back home, they would be done on every personal level. They would only be professional partners and that would break him.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, her breath tickling the side of his neck.
“Me too.”
For so much, but mostly because she didn’t trust him enough to ensure she wouldn’t get hurt by staying.
Chapter Twenty-Two
“You can take the documents on your way out of town.”
Jade stood with said documents extended to Olivia. She glared at them, then back up at her so-called friend. “Can’t you just drop them off?”
Shaking her head, Jade replied, “You can. It’s on your way out of town and you can’t avoid him forever.”
Olivia had done a stellar job of dodging Jax for the past two weeks since he romantically carried her to his truck after she’d flown her father’s plane. She had called and talked to Piper on the phone to explain that she had to leave and go back to her job and home in Atlanta.
Piper understood, and no doubt Jax had already had a discussion with his toddler. Kids were resilient. Too bad adult emotions couldn’t bounce back that fast.
Jade merely raised her brow and Olivia jerked the documents from her hand. “I hate you.”
“Of course you do, but since Mel and I are staying behind to help sell this place, you’ll love me again.”
In theory, the plan sounded utterly flawless. Jade and Melanie were going to hang back for a bit since Atlanta was a whole host of issues for them right now. That would keep the worry of setting up showings off Olivia, and then when it sold she would come back and sign the papers.
The airport papers in her hand, though, was a whole other host of issues. But this would be simple, right? Go in, drop off the packet, leave. Maybe Jax would be out on a flight. It was a gorgeous Sunday afternoon, surely someone wanted to go somewhere. Oh, maybe he was giving lessons. This would be an ideal time.
“Are you standing there trying to find another excuse not to go?” Jade asked.
Olivia opened her handbag and slid the documents inside. “Not at all. I’m not afraid to stop by on my way out of town.”
More like terrified. She wanted . . . everything. She wanted the job and the man, but that wasn’t possible and she’d made her decision.
And guilt had spawned her to set something into motion that would probably upset Jax, but she had to do something. She knew what the airport meant to him and she knew he’d been saving for a new-to-him plane. Maybe once the surprise came through, he wouldn’t hate her so much. She hoped. The thought of him hating her was more than she could take. She’d already hurt him, hurt herself, but there was no way to have it all. There just wasn’t.
“You sure you’re going?” Jade asked, her tone sincere and concerning. She crossed her arms over her chest and tipped her head to the side. “No one would think less of you if you decided to stay and turn down that promotion.”
“I need to do this. I have to at least try.”
