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“Look at her,” she sobbed. “She’s on life support, Bullet.”
He knocked the chair over on his way out the door. He couldn’t deal with this right now.
When Bullet came back the next day, the ICU nurse tried to stop him from taking Grey to see Callie, but he pushed right past her. If what his mother-in-law told him was true and they needed to make a decision about taking Callie off life support, he wanted Grey to see his mother one more time, to say goodbye.
He had to hold the boy tight to keep him from scrambling out of his arms to crawl on the bed. It nearly broke Bullet’s heart to see how much the boy wanted to go to her. He looked toward the door and saw the same nurse who’d tried to stop him, with tears rolling down her cheeks. Bullet couldn’t stop himself from crying either.
This was the hardest decision he’d had to make in his life so far, but Callie was gone. The doctors said so. She’d never wake up again. She’d never hold their child again.
He carefully lowered Grey onto the bed and showed him where he could put his arms around his mama. Grey rested his head on her tummy and started humming the same lullaby Bullet knew Callie sang to him.
His heart was breaking for his little boy, and for himself. As hard as their life together had been, Bullet had honestly wanted to make things work with Callie. Maybe once they’d both grown up a little, it would’ve. Now there’d be no working things out, no little family living happily ever after. Bullet put his hands over his face and quietly sobbed, mourning his wife who’d decided her only choice was to give up on life.
Bullet picked Grey up and went in search of his in-laws. He’d made his decision; they’d be taking Callie off the machines that were keeping her alive.
“I can’t believe you’re taking him away from us,” said his mother-in-law.
“It isn’t like that. I’m not taking him away. You knew I was trying to build a life for us in Colorado. The plan was always to move Callie and Grey there as soon as I got my footing.”
Bullet lifted Grey from his mother-in-law’s arms, shook his father-in-law’s hand, and told them he’d be in touch.
They’d buried Callie the day before, and there wasn’t any reason for him to stay here a day longer. He was anxious to get him and Grey back to where he knew they belonged. It was a thirteen-hour drive, and he’d heard the weather wasn’t so good. He’d get as far as he could today, sleep, and then make the rest of the drive in the morning.
He didn’t know yet where they were going to live, or how he was going to take care of Grey and work at the same time, but Billy and Jace assured him they expected him to come back, and they’d figure it out.
He wasn’t the only one with a baby, they’d told him. That was true. However, he was the only one without a baby mama. That had to make a difference.
Since they’d hired him, a few months ago, to help with their new rough stock contracting business, he’d never felt as though he was just another hand. They asked his opinion about things. He’d even had a few ideas that had changed the direction of the new operation. The job was important to him because it allowed him to stay in the rodeo business. Someday soon, he planned to be on the bull riding side of Flying R rather than the rough stock side.
“It’s you and me, partner,” he said as he buckled Grey into his buddy seat. “Wish you could ride up front with me and keep me company, but you’re still too young for that. You’re safer back here.”
Bullet opened the bag of toys and books his mother-in-law had packed for them and tried to put them within Grey’s reach.
“We got a long-ass drive ahead of us. You be sure to let me know when you need somethin’, okay, buddy?”
Grey looked at him, and then picked up one of his toy trucks. “Voom, voom,” he said and plowed the truck into Bullet’s abdomen.
“Ouch,” he squealed, which made Grey laugh. If this was how it would be all the time, Bullet could handle it. But he knew better. About an hour in, Grey would get fussy. It would probably take them twice as long to get to Colorado than he was planning. He figured he’d be stopping a lot more often than he wanted to.
“This is our life now, buddy,” he kissed Grey’s cheek, and climbed in the front seat. “Here we go.”
“Voom, voom,” answered Grey.
“I stopped earlier than I planned to,” Bullet told his sister. “It’ll probably take me three days to get to Crested Butte, but I didn’t have a choice. Grey’s fussy, and I can’t keep him trapped in the back seat of the truck for hours on end.”
“I’m headed to Crested Butte now,” Lyric told him. “Dad is on tour, but they’re trying to get there too.”
“They don’t have to leave the tour. Grey and I will be okay.” Bullet felt his eyes fill up with tears. What the hell was wrong with him lately?
“It’s more than just leaving the tour. They’re planning to buy a house in Colorado.”
“When did they decide to do that?” Bullet shook his head. He never imagined his dad would agree to leave Los Angeles. His mom had been ready to leave years ago.
“They’ve been thinkin’ about it for a while.”
“Where’re they gonna live?”
“I don’t think they’ve decided yet. Maybe Aspen. Mom wants a place there, but said it might be out of Dad’s ‘comfort zone,’ whatever that means.”
