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"They say absence makes the heart grow fonder."
"I told her that but she replied 'out of sight, out of mind'. She thinks it would be inevitable that Chris would find someone else."
"He might. Liam will always be her son. Look, I know how hard it is to lose a mother. I survived, but I wouldn't want to force a child through it."
"She mentioned you and said that you were able to be a success even though your mother left. She said that a lot of children spend long periods of time with their grandparents and besides, she said she'd fly home frequently on holidays to be with Liam."
"It's not enough," I said, frowning, angry at Maureen for doing this to Liam. "Holidays are never enough."
We sat in silence for a while and I sipped my lemonade, wondering how upset Liam would be when he learned she was leaving. I remembered crying for days when my mother left and my father was no help. He kept trying to reassure me that she'd come back for visits, but she never did. She sent me cards for the first year or two but even they stopped when she got a new life and moved on.
It hurt.
Who knew how much losing my mother shaped me into the man I currently was? I was wound up so tight growing up, trying to keep my emotions in check, fearing that if I didn't, people wouldn't like me. My father loved me, but he only showed it by doing physical things with me, like working on a car or bike or taking me on trips where we didn't talk about things that really mattered.
I didn't want Liam to grow up with a father like that. I wanted him to know I loved him because I showed it and told him so.
I did love Liam, even though I barely knew him. I felt an incredible wave of emotion as I sat there with Brenda and thought about Maureen leaving him to go to Indonesia. My eyes brimmed and I had to bite my inner cheek to stop it, the pain washing away some of my emotions.
"I'll do whatever Liam needs," I said, my voice choked up. "If he wants to come and stay with us, I'll be happy to have him and so will Kate. I know Sophie would love to have a big brother. You can see him as much as you want."
"I want you to know that Maureen will fight you having custody."
"What?" I said and turned to face Brenda. "If she's going away, she has to let me have him. He needs a parent. It's great he has you, but he needs a father and a mother. Kate and I will give him that. How could she fight it?"
"The trial," Brenda said and sighed. "She thinks it would be bad for Liam to be living with you while the trial is going on. She doesn't want him to know his father is involved in anything sordid."
"I'm not. Kate was attacked by a psychopath who imagined a relationship between us."
"I know that and you know that, but Maureen has this thing about you, Drake. I just wanted you to know that if you want custody, you'll have to sue for it."
"I will," I said, my anger rising, making my heart pound. "I'll sue for custody and I have some of the best lawyers money can buy."
"I know," she said. "I'm sure you do. The courts can be tricky when it comes to custody, especially if parents have been involved in anything..." she hesitated. "Questionable, sexually. Just be prepared."
"I will."
Then I left, my heart heavy at the thought that Maureen would leave Liam for so long. If I had anything to do with it, he'd come to live with me.
I was his father.
Chapter 5
KATE
Drake left Sophie and me and took his car down the coast to Maureen's. Instead of spending the afternoon with him before I went to the studio as I had planned, it would just be Sophie and me, alone as usual.
I felt bad for Drake and Brenda, having to work together to try and figure out how
to deal with Maureen's depression and desire to leave the country with Chris, but if Drake could get shared custody, maybe this would give him the chance to really be a father to Liam. He saved Liam's life and now, maybe he'd be able to get to know him as a son. My heart squeezed to think of how sad Liam would be to see his mother leave. How could he feel anything but rejected and abandoned? Maureen had to be completely depressed to be willing to leave Liam behind and go with Chris. I couldn’t understand it.
But then I remembered – that's exactly what happened to Drake.
Drake's mother left him when he was only ten years old. She'd never recovered from the loss of Drake's older brother, Liam. Was history repeating itself?
I promised myself that I would be a real mother to Liam, if he came to live with us. Drake grew up without a mother. He had a succession of nannies and housekeepers who looked after him well enough but of course, they likely didn’t love him the way a mother does.
I wouldn't let Liam grow up without a mother, if it came to that. I felt tears fill my eyes at the thought that Maureen could even consider leaving Liam, and hugged Sophie tightly while she sat in my lap and drank her afternoon bottle before her nap.
