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"You never understood, did you? Not really, I mean. You're married, but what's marriage to you? A convenient union serving your own selfish purposes?" he said, his voice coming almost like the hiss of a snake.
"Paul, please. . ."
"You should see how small she's getting, Gisselle. She's wilting like a flower in that bed, her beauty decomposing right before my eyes."
"What? What did you call me?"
"You know what I tell people? I tell them the angels were jealous. They looked down on us and saw how perfect our love was. Even heaven was not as perfect and so they conspired out of envy to cause this tragedy. Too romantic for you, Gisselle? You were never very romantic, were you? What was a man to you . . . a partner in bed, someone to tease and torment. You were jealous of your sister because she had the capacity to love and you didn't, right?
"Oh, what a miserable thing jealousy is. It rots you from inside. You'll see, Gisselle. You'll see. I feel sorry for you and for all the women of the world who don't have the capacity to love as Ruby had."
A numb kind of sensation in my chest made me feel unreal. "Paul, why are you talking like this? Is there someone standing near you? Why are you saying these things?"
"Why? Because . . . because I'm sick to death of the good suffering and the bad enjoying all the pleasure and happiness in this world. That's why. Anyway, thanks for calling. You did your duty. You can ease your conscience and go back to your pursuit of pleasures."
"Paul!"
"I'm tired. I need to get a drink and then try to get a little sleep. Good night, Gisselle. Oh, say hello to your dashing, debonair husband. I'm sure he feels lucky his wife isn't the sick-to-death one."
"Paul!" I cried as the phone went silent. I stood there holding the receiver in my hand as if it were a dead bird. Then I ran to find Beau. He was in the office going over some business documents, and looked up with surprise.
"What's wrong?" he asked immediately.
I told him about Paul and what he had been doing all week.
Beau thought a moment and then shrugged. "Just sounds like he's taken the responsibility of his role in all this seriously and he's putting in a good performance. We should be grateful."
"No, Beau. You don't understand. You don't know Paul. He wouldn't say the things he said to me. He's not well. I want to go to Cypress Woods tomorrow. We have to go, Beau. Don't try to talk me out of it!"
"All right. We'll do it," he said. "Calm down. Are you sure he's not just playing to your feelings, taking advantage of them?"
"I don't think so. You don't know how strange he sounded. Beau," I said, looking up with my eyes wide and full of anxiety. "He called me Gisselle and spoke about her as Ruby."
"So? That was the idea."
"But I don't think anyone was listening in. He had no reason to call me Gisselle."
Beau thought a moment. "Maybe he was just drunk," he said. "Confused."
"It put a chill through me," I said, embracing myself. "What have we done? Beau, what have we done?"
"Stop it," Beau cried, springing up from his seat. He took my shoulders into his hands, his fingers feeling like steel through the thin fabric of my blouse. "Just stop this now, Ruby. You're going to get yourself all worked up for nothing. He's upset that you're with me now and he's not taking that well. He'll get used to it and this will all end as we expected it would. Gisselle's condition isn't our fault. It happened and we just took advantage of the opportunity. Paul agreed to it, helped make it possible. Now he's feeling sorry for himself. Well, I'm sorry about that, but it's too late to turn back, and he's going to have to realize it and get hold of himself. Just as you must," he added sternly.
I pulled back my tears and nodded. "Yes, Beau. I'm sure you're right. I'm sorry I got a little hysterical."
"Hey. You've been doi
ng fantastically. I understand the pressure you've been under and I appreciate it, but you can't lose it now."
I nodded again. "Okay, Beau. I'm all right."
"Sure?"
"Yes."
He kissed me on the forehead and held me to him tightly, kissing my cheeks and stroking my hair. When he looked at me, his soft eyes caressed me.
"I won't let anything happen and I certainly won't ever lose you again, Ruby. I love you more than anything." We kissed and then he put his arm around my shoulders and walked me out. We kissed again at the foot of the stairway. I started up, pausing to look down at him. He gave me a big smile. I took a deep breath and told myself he was right. Tomorrow we would go see Paul and we would calm him down, too.
