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"No," I said. I thought a moment. 'Not for about two years, I think.'
"He forced a laugh.
"'Then it's certainly time to do it,' he said standing. "Ariel practically leaped to her feet.
"'Are you sure you don't want to go to a movie with us?' she asked.
"'No thanks,' I said. The smile on my face was like a little mechanical movement made by thin wires attached to the corners of my mouth.
"'We'll be back early,' Daddy promised. He went for his light jacket and Ariel went to the bathroom to fix her face and hair. They looked like two teenagers out on a date. I hated them for it, but I said nothing and they left.
"I remember it was so quiet in that apartment that I could hear my heart thumping. Natural curiosity took me on an exploration and I went into their bedroom and looked at Ariel's clothes. I even opened drawers and looked at her lingerie. I suppose I was searching for any trace of Mommy or myself in Daddy's life now. He didn't even have a picture of me.
"Finally, I did go to bed, watched a little television and fell asleep. I didn't hear them come home, but Daddy looked in on me and turned off the television set. That woke me but he didn't wait. I heard the door close softly and then I heard their voices through the wall. I heard Ariel's light giggles and his voice soft and low.
"They tried to make love as quietly as possible and I tried to ignore it, but I knew what was happening. Afterward, I lay there staring up at the dark ceiling wondering what Mommy was doing tonight.
"In my mind I saw her alone in her bed, confused. I guess it was only natural to feel sorrier for her at this moment. Daddy looked like he was reorganizing his life just the way he wanted it to be. He had his new romantic interest. I wondered if he was telling Ariel things he had told my mother when they were young and in love years ago. Did he use the same poetry, make the same sort of promises and vows? Maybe he even took her to the same places.
"I think the worst thing that's happened for me in my parents' divorce is my feeling that nothing Daddy says means anything anymore. His whole life was apparently a big lie. Maybe that's unfair considering what problems Mommy has, but I can't help it. It's supposed to be for better or worse, isn't it? Why should he keep any of his promises?
"I kept it all inside me. Ariel continued to be as nice to me as could be the next day. It wasn't a bad day. I enjoyed the boat. Daddy let me drive it while he and Ariel sat behind me and screamed at my abrupt turns, the water splashing over them. I began to think maybe I should just have fun and forget it all, forget trying to make sense out of it.
"I ate better at lunch and that night we went to the Third Street Promenade in Santa Monica where we walked and ate in a small Italian restaurant. Ariel and I went shopping in some of the fun stores and then we went to the music store and Daddy bought me three new CDs. He bought me another silly T-shirt, too, and a ring with my birthstone in it.
"Visiting with my divorced father was like having Christmas and my birthday all wrapped up in one trip. For now, at least, I could ask for the moon.
"It wasn't until the evening that I realized going boating had given me a tan. It was the first thing Mommy noticed when Daddy brought me back on Sunday.
"'Look at you,' she cried. 'You're sunburned. Weren't you wearing any sunscreen?'
"'I'm not sunburned, Mommy, just a bit tanned.'
"'A bit. You should have known better, Misty, and he should have known better. I don't imagine his girlfriend would know any better. From what I hear, she's not much older than you.'
"Mommy was waiting for me to give her a report, of course, but I didn't offer any and that disappointed her.
When she saw all the things Daddy had bought me, it was like salt on a wound. She was off again, complaining about the financial settlements.
"This is how it's always going to be, I thought, neither of them letting me enjoy myself as long as I was with the other. I was better off not being with either of them. That's what I began to think more and more and that's why I got into trouble," I said. I looked at Doctor Marlowe and added, "That's only one of the reasons." She was happier. I wasn't putting all the blame on my parents. I was taking some responsibility.
"My next visit with Daddy didn't happen when it was supposed to and that became sort of the rule and not the exception. Once again, he claimed business conflicts. Whenever he tried to reschedule dates, Mommy made him suffer. She had her attorney call his attorney and complain about the disruption it caused in her life.
"She wanted me to side with her so she talked about it incessantly at dinner or whenever I was available. She would come bursting into my room to tell me my father had called to say he couldn't make the next weekend. He was going to be in Chicago or Boston or someplace else.
"'I have a life to resurrect too,' Mommy complained. 'I'm not going to go and change all my plans because his life is a mess.'
"'I don't care,' I told her.
"'Of course you don't care. Who can blame you for not caring? Look how selfish he is. The judge set down the rules and he's going to have to learn how to live by them whether he likes it or not,' she vowed.
"Not once did it ever occur to her that I was the one who was suffering with all this. When was it supposed to end? When does the thunder and lighting move on? Every time her phone rang at dinner, I anticipated trouble. She seemed to be on the ph
one with her attorney every single day. No matter how much they made, I thought, divorce attorneys couldn't really enjoy their work, especially if they had clients like my parents."
"You haven't heard anything until you've heard about mine," Jade piped up. Until then she had been sitting attentively, her legs pulled up under her, looking like she was almost enjoying my story.
"You poor rich girls," Star quipped. Jade threw her a look that would knock over a cow.
