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Rodney, who still slept next to them on his cot-bed,
was sitting up, playing quietly with one of his toys.
He looked happy when he saw me looking in on him "My heart felt like a Yo-Yo whose string had
broken. All night it had gone up and down with every
sound in the building that suggested Daddy's return.
Now, it was clear he hadn't come back and I was sick
with fear.
"I took Rodney into the living room and fixed
him some breakfast. Momma woke up looking dazed
and confused as usual after a night of drinking. She
was surprised to see Daddy hadn't returned, too. "'Where'd Daddy go?' I asked her
"'How would I know? Who cares?' she said, but
it bothered her when he didn't return the next day. She
got on the phone and complained to Granny and then
two days after that, she started to call some of Daddy's
friends and I guess she found out he had left Los
Angeles. That was when she went to welfare and cried
about our situation.
"For a long time, I expected Daddy would come
back, even after I saw him that last time and he
hurried away from me. I never told Momma I had
seen him. I knew it would just make her wild and
angry and after a while, I began to wonder if I had
really seen him or just imagined it out of hope.
Whenever the phone rang, I hoped it was him calling,
but it never was. Momma was so furious she would
swear she wasn't going to take him back if he did
show up, but I knew in my heart she would.
"Granny started to spend more time with us
soon after all that. She lives in Venice Beach so it was
