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"He had a really nice smile. His whole face would change, warm up and look more than just friendly. His eyes were laughing, full of sparkling light. He was . . ."
"Sexy?" Misty offered.
"No, not just that. It was full of understanding. That's it. I felt we spoke and thought alike. Granny has this expression 'birds of a feather.' She often looks at people in the street and says, 'Them two are birds of a feather.' People make fun of older people who have all these funny sayings and such, but some of them were dipped in a well of wisdom and make lots of sense. At least to me," I added.
"So?" Jade asked impatiently. "What happened after this great smile?"
"You can make fun all you want," I said, "but sometimes people say more with one look than they do with a thousand words."
"I'm not making fun. I just want to know what happened next," she insisted. She blew air through her lips and shook her head at me.
I glanced at Doctor Marlowe, who just wore that infuriating look of patience, waiting for one of us to throw a tantrum.
"After class Steve and I finally got into a conversation," I said, my voice taut and strained until I began remembering. "It continued into lunch and I sat with him and Matthew, who looked upset about it the whole time, practically eating nothing."
"He was jealous of the time you were taking with his only friend, huh?" Misty asked.
"I guess. I tried to be nice to him, but he looked angry no matter what. It took another few days of conversation before I found out that Steve's mother had been killed in a car accident about five years ago and he lived with his father and had no brothers or sisters, but I could tell from the way he spoke about his father that things were bad.
"Later, I would learn that it was his father who was driving the car and he was drunk. He was cited for DWI and actually charged with vehicular manslaughter, but he got probation, probably because of Steve losing his mother.
"We began to talk every chance we got at school. Sometimes, we-ate lunch outside and really felt we had privacy because the other kids weren't staring at us and whispering. Eventually, I felt comfortable enough to tell him about my life, what had happened with my daddy and momma and such. He was less open about his life. If I asked him a question, he would look away, maybe eat some of his food, and then finally give me a short answer. I could tell pretty fast what he would talk about and what he wouldn't."
"What about Matthew all this time?" Cat asked.
"He followed us around sometimes and after a while, he was nicer to me.
"And then Steve asked me on a date. I guess it wasn't a date exactly, but it was the first time I had a boy ask to come by and get me to go someplace with him"
"He had his own car?" Jade asked skeptically.
"No. We were taking the Big Blue Bus' I said. "The poor people's limousine," I added dryly. She pursed those pretty lips and gazed at the ceiling.
"Where did you go?" Misty asked.
"To the Santa Monica pier. I asked Granny if I could go and then Rodney got all excited about it and I had to take him, too, but that was another thing I liked about Steve. He didn't mind Rodney being along. In fact, he felt better because he was coming along, I think. I think he was real nervous about being alone with me and jumped at the chance to be like a big brother more than a boyfriend.
"Of course, Rodney ate it up. I laughed to myself at the way he immediately looked up to Steve, hanging on his every word as if Steve was one of his television heroes or something. Then I thought to myself, Rodney never had a real father long enough to appreciate him and of course, he had no older brother, and Aaron was nothing to him I was okay as his sister, but it wasn't the same thing for a little boy. No wonder he was so excited about the attention Steve gave him.
"They got this fun park on the pier. You all probably know about it."
They all nodded.
"Taking Rodney on the rides was fun for both of us. Steve insisted on paying for everything no matter how much I protested. He told me there was some money put aside in a trust for him from his mother's life insurance so he would have something with which to start when he got out of high school, and for now his father gave him a generous allowance because he was responsible for buying things they needed, food and such.
"We talked about what we'd do after we graduated. I still had no idea, but he thought he might enlist in the army. Because of his trust he was secure about his future, knowing he had something he could depend upon.
"'My father can't get his hands on it, either,' he pointed out. 'My mother was smart enough to know my father wasn't going to provide all that well for us and she believed she'd be working her whole life too, just to make ends meet,' he said. 'She made sure I'd be all right.'
"His eyes always filled with tears when he talked about his momma, but he knew it was happening and snapped those lids like two rubber bands and brought that famous hard, cold look back into them.
"At the pier, he really seemed to be enjoying Rodney, laughing at the way Rodney's face filled with pure ecstasy at the prospect of going from one ride to the other, getting a hot dog and a cotton candy, playing machines in the arcade, trying to win cheap prizes that you'd be better off just going out and buying.
"I guess after a while I was jealous."
"Jealous?" Misty asked, jumping on what I had said. "Why should you be jealous of hot dogs, cotton candy and pinball machines?"
"It wasn't that. Steve seemed more excited about having fun with Rodney than being with me." I looked at Doctor Marlowe. She and I had discussed this and worked it out, I thought.
