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"Of course, he still admits it was wrong and he's very sorry for the pain and suffering he caused all of us, but I couldn't help but feel more sorry for him than I felt for myself. It's broken him and with Mamma gone, he really has nothing."
I wasn't as strong as Jimmy; I couldn't keep my tears from pouring over and out of my lids. He smiled at me and leaned over the table to wipe the tears from my cheeks.
"But he's happier now, Dawn, and he sends you his love. He's made some new friends; he likes his new job."
"I know. He wrote to tell me that."
"But I bet he didn't tell you he has a lady friend," Jimmy said with a wry smile.
"Lady friend?"
"She's cooking for him and I had the suspicion she was doing a lot more, but they didn't want me to know about it just yet," he said, his smile spreading.
Of course I was happy that Daddy Longchamp had found some companionship and wasn't going to be lonely any more. I knew what it meant to be lonely and how it made your heart heavy and even bright sunny days look gloomy and dark. But I couldn't help thinking about Momma and that made hearing about Daddy Longchamp and another woman painful to me. My expression must have shown my confusion because Jimmy reached across the table and took my hand in his.
"But he told me no one could ever replace Momma in his heart," Jimmy said quickly.
I nodded, trying to understand.
"Daddy described how hard he's been working to locate Fern," Jimmy said, "but he can't get any details. It seems everyone's sworn to secrecy about it. He was told that was the way they protect the family that took her in and the way they protect her from being bothered later on."
"But he's her real father!" I protested.
"And a man with a prison record," Jimmy reminded me, "who doesn't have any money or a real job or a wife to help raise a child. Of course, he still hopes that someday . . ."
"Someday we'll find her, Jimmy. And we'll bring the family together again," I said with clear and sharp determination.
Jimmy smiled and nodded. "Sure we will, Dawn."
It wasn't until after our food came that we broke loose with talk about ourselves. Jimmy described his training, his friends and some of the things he had seen and done. I told him about school, about Madame Steichen, more about Trisha and described the other students in our apartment house, especially poor Arthur Garwood. After a while it seemed I was doing all the talking and Jimmy was listening, eyes wide.
"This is certainly a lot different for you than any of the other places we've been," he concluded. "But I'm glad you're with people who see how talented you are."
Then he broke the bad news: how he was really in New York because he was going to be shipped out to Europe tomorrow afternoon.
"Europe! Oh Jimmy, when will I see you again?"
"It won't be as long as you think, Dawn, and I'll write often. Don't look so worried," he said, smiling, "there's no war on. All soldiers go on a tour of duty someplace. This way I get to see some of the world and Uncle Sam pays my way.
"We don't have much time together, Dawn," he added with a serious look in his eyes, "let's not spend one moment of it unhappy, okay?"
How wise he sounded. Time and tragedy had changed him. I realized that Jimmy had really been on his own most of the time since that morning the police had come to our apartment in Richmond and declared that our father was a kidnapper. Jimmy had no choice but to grow up.
I swallowed back my tears and forced a smile. "Let's go for a walk," I said, "so I can show you my school."
Jimmy took out his wallet and paid the enormous dinner bill without blinking an eye and we left. He was surprised at how well I knew my way around the city, explained how Trisha and I often took the buses and the subways now to go to the museums and see shows.
"You're growing up fast, Dawn," Jimmy said but looked sad about it. "And becoming so sophisticated I probably won’t recognize you when I come back and you probably won't want much to do with me."
"Oh Jimmy, don't ever say that!" I cried, stopping on the sidewalk. "I'll never think I'm better than you. That's a horrible thing to say."
"All right, all right," he said, laughing. "I'm sorry." "You mustn't even think such a thing about me. I would just as soon quit this school."
"Don't you dare, Dawn. You're going to become a star. I just know you will," he said firmly. Then he reached out and took my hand so that we walked holding hands all the rest of the way.
After I showed him the school and the small park nearby, he told me about his hotel.
"It's nothing fancy, but I got a nice view of the city because I'm twenty-eight floors up."
