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young policeman holding everyone back. It frightened
me even more to imagine it, so hurried to the platform
and took the first available seat on a bench. Because
there was still some time before the train left, there
weren't many people here. I saw a woman with two
little girls two benches down from me. She was reading to them from a children's storybook to keep them occupied. I couldn't help remembering the way
Momma would read to me.
How different the world was when I was very
little and we were all living in our Boston home, I
thought. Watching this mother and her children made
me wonder about the baby I was carrying. Was it a
boy or a girl? When I gave birth, should I keep the
child or give it up for adoption? What would Grandma
Jana's advice be? Could I give up the baby once I had
held it in my arms? But wasn't I too young to be a
mother, and if I did become a mother, what kind of a
mother would I be?
I knew I would never be a mother like mine. I'd
rather give the child away than be that, I thought. I set
Angel down beside me and closed my eyes. The
rumble of trains approaching and leaving other
platforms made the floor quake. Soon, more and more
people began to arrive. When a man in a suit and tie
sat down beside me, I hugged Angel to me. The man
smiled but then immediately opened a newspaper and
began reading.
My heart began to thump again. It was getting
closer and closer to my departure. I looked back. Was
I making the right decision? It would be easy to change my mind. I could simply call and have Miles return. Soon, he would be arriving at Farthy himself and he would either mention taking me to the train station or be asked where he had gone. Momma would find out and send him right back to get me, but
he wouldn't arrive in time.
