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I hoped we wouldn't be shaken out and fall too soon.
11 Another Orphan in the Nest of Orphans
My parents hoped our upcoming weekend in the city would put a smile back on my face. I tried to be as upbeat as I could about it, but I was nervous about making the phone call to Karen's mother. There was still a great deal of chatter about her and what was going on as a result of what had happened. A parade of Pearson customers, even those who didn't particularly care for Darlene Pearson, visited her after the funeral, and everyone who left was pleased to leave with some sort of news, some information or discovery. Karen's gossip birds were very busy flitting from wire to wire to spread the chatter over telephone lines.
It was quickly known that instead of trying to sell out and perhaps even move away, Darlene Pearson had immediately begun advertising for a pharmacist. She told people she wanted to hold on to the drugstore, keep her beautiful home, and remain in the community. Everyone, even her detractors, remarked about how well she was holding up. She wasn't avoiding anyone or anything, instead taking on all her problems head-on. Before we left for the weekend trip, I was even more surprised to learn that Karen's mother had called my father and asked if she could see me. He broke the news to me on Thursday night right after dinner. My mother obviously knew already.
Karen and I had devised what she called our postal service, because neither of us was comfortable with her leaving notes in my bathroom. I might miss one, and my mother might find it. Karen decided she would leave a note for me in my copy of The Diary of Anne Frank, and I would respond and leave my answer in the book, just in case we had little or no opportunity to meet in the attic because my mother would be home when I returned from school and my father would be home before she headed off to the hospital for a late shift.
"What do you mean, she would like to see me?" I asked my father when he made the announcement concerning Karen's mother's request.
He had sat back and begun by telling me he had received a phone call at his office that afternoon from Darlene Pearson.
"She asked how you were doing. She was concerned about you," he said. My mother stood off by the sink, quietly putting dishes into the dishwasher but keeping her eyes on my face as my father spoke. I didn't say anything.
"It's rather generous of her to be worried about you with all that's on her head," he told me. I saw my mother nod. "I think she had expected you would come around to see her on your own. I know she was a little disappointed about that, but I explained how hard it has been for you at school and such, and she understood. However," he continued, fingering a coffee spoon, "she would very much like to see you, and I think it would be a nice gesture, don't you?"
He looked up quickly for my reaction. "What does she want?" I asked.
"Just to talk. These last few months, she felt as
if she had two daughters," he added. "At least, that's what she says, honey. Eventually, you're going to run into her, anyway. There's no point in avoiding it, is there?"
I shook my head. "I'm not avoiding it. I just don't know what I will say to her," I said.
"You'll think of something. Why don't I pick you up after school tomorrow and we go over to her house together?" he suggested.
I looked away quickly. The house? Returning to it, returning to where it had happened, where it had all been developing, was suddenly quite terrifying to me.
"I'll be there with you the whole time," my father said, sensing the need to reassure me.
"I could change a shift with Sue Cohen and be there, too," my mother offered. "We should probably all be together, don't you think, Michael?"
"I guess. But I don't want to make it look like we're afraid to have her question Zipporah," he said.
I shifted my eyes back to him quickly. "Question me about what?"
My father smiled. "I don't know, honey. I'm sure she's as confused and troubled by it all as anyone can be. Maybe she thinks you'll be able to help her get through it, understand it better. It would only be a kindness, even if you add nothing to her search for answers."
He looked at my mother. "Her sister and brother-in- law left a few days ago. It can't be easy remaining in that house alone now."
My mother shook her head and clicked her lips. "To lose two husbands," she said. "It's a wonder she can function."
It's a wonder she can function? If they only knew what I knew, what Karen had been telling me about her mother, they wouldn't be so sympathetic, but I could hardly say anything about all that now. What was Karen going to say about all this? I wondered. I shouldn't go over there until I had a chance to speak with her.
"Can we wait?" I asked. "Can we do it next week? It makes me nervous to think about it."
My father just stared at me a moment and then turned to my mother to see what she thought.
"It is very fresh, Michael. She's just getting steady on her own feet again."
"Hmm," he said, but his suspicious eyes made me more nervous. Perhaps I was only stirring up the pot. Perhaps I should just do it and get it over with.
"I mean, I'll go if you want me to."
"Michael?"
"Okay, I'll call her and explain. How about we all go see her on Sunday evening, after we return from New York? Maybe after being away, you'll feel better."
