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"Alice," my grandmother said. "Alice, do you hear me? Alice?" She turned to the doctor. "She's looking at me, but she doesn't seem to hear me or even see me."
"She's still in quite a daze," he said.
Was I dreaming? I seemed to be looking at them through a thick fog. Slowly, it began to clear.
"What happened to me, Grandma?"
"You shattered your hip pretty badly," she said. "You're going to need an operation to see what can be done. You have a concussion, but the doctor says it's not life threatening. You have trauma all over your body, Alice. It's amazing you don't have even more serious injuries."
As she spoke, I looked at my grandfather and then the doctor. They weren't just watching my reactions. There was something else in their faces, something that frightened me. I closed my eyes and tried hard to remember everything. It was as if I were coming up from a pool of ink, slowly rising toward the light. A part of me wanted to keep from rising. I was shaking my head, pleading to stop going toward the light, but I couldn't prevent it.
I burst out, and the memories rushed at me like some sort of mad little animals, eager to take a bite out of me. I brought my left hand to my face and moaned.
"Easy," the doctor said.
"What . . . where's Craig?" I asked.
No one replied. They just looked at me. Then my grandmother looked to my grandfather and he stepped forward.
"Craig didn't make it, Alice."
"Didn't make what?"
"His injuries were far more severe."
I continued to stare at him, waiting for him to add, "But he'll be all right."
He didn't add anything. He lowered his eyes. "You mean Craig's dead?"
"Oh God," my grandmother said. Her lips trembled.
It was as if her face was in an earthquake. Tears began to stream down her cheeks.
"He's dead?" I asked again.
"Yes, Alice. He's passed away," my grandfather said.
I closed my eyes, and then I fell back into the inky pool and began to descend.
When I woke up again, my aunt Zipporah was there. She was staring out the window.
"Aunt Zipporah?"
"Oh, Alice. I'm so glad you're awake. You poor kid."
"Where are Grandpa and Grandma?"
"They're having something to eat in the hospital cafeteria. How are you feeling?"
"Numb," I said. I thought for a moment. Had I been awake and had I spoken with my grandparents and did they really say what I thought they had said?
Aunt Zipporah pulled a chair close to the bed and took my left hand into her hands. She smiled at me.
"You'll be all right," she said. "Banged up, but you'll be all right."
"I was in a car accident."
"Terrible one. Your grandfather says anyone looking at the wreck would have a hard time believing you lived."
