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“That’s what older brothers do.”
“I don’t do it to Charlie.”
Nash looked down at the one-year-old, who was happily splashing away and sucking on the soapy washcloth. Looking back at Jack, he said, “Go ahead. Call him a girlie boy, if it’ll make you feel better.”
Jack smiled, got close to the tub, and said, “Girlie boy. Charlie, you’re a little girlie boy.”
Charlie looked up at his older brother and let loose an ear-splitting squeal. They all started laughing and Jack tried it again. Nash reached out, put his arm around Jack, and kissed him on the top of the head. “I’ll talk to him, Jack, but you have to remember, Rory’s going through a tough time right now. School isn’t as easy for him as it is for you.”
“So…I’d rather be good at sports like him.”
“Buddy, you haven’t even hit puberty yet.”
“Rory was good at everything. Even before puberty.”
“We all have our God-given gifts, son. I was a good athlete, and right now I’d rather have your brains than my brawn.”
Just then, Maggie walked in the door, her hair pulled back in a high ponytail. She looked lovingly at her husband with his arm around her third child and the soapy head of her baby just barely visible over the top edge of the laundry tub.
“Oh…isn’t this a nice picture? Look at Daddy and his little helper and my precious baby.”
Charlie had been preoccupied with something beneath the waterline, but when he heard his mother’s voice, his big brown eyes darted up to find the most important person in his world. A huge smile spread across his face and his little fingers reached out for the edge of the tub. He grabbed ahold of the lip and with considerable effort pulled himself to his full height of twenty-seven inches, and blurted out the word that he had so proudly yelled nearly twelve hours earlier while eating his breakfast.
Maggie froze, Nash tried not to laugh and Jack blurted out, “I swear I didn’t teach him that word.” Neither parent responded, so he added, “I bet it was Rory.”
“It was your mother,” Nash said with no lack of joy.
Maggie snapped at her husband, “Like you don’t walk around here swearing all the time.”
“Jack,” Nash said, “who swears more, me or Mommy?”
Jack looked back and forth between his two parents and then proved just how smart he was by darting past his father and into the kitchen. “No way am I getting in the middle of this,” he yelled over his shoulder.
Maggie defiantly folded her arms across her chest and stared at her husband. “I’m sure he’s heard you say it before.”
Nash nodded, dipped a hand into the soapy water, and came up with the washcloth. He started wiping down Charlie’s backside. “You do whatever you need to do to make yourself feel better about this one, princess.”
Charlie looked up at his mother. The happy look was gone, replaced by a look that mirrored the concerned look of his mother. In a much softer voice this time he muttered the word that was causing his mother’s distress. Nash couldn’t take it anymore and burst out laughing.
Maggie, trying to hold her neutral expression, said, “Michael, you have to ignore him.”
Charlie smiled at his dad and repeated the word two more times. Nash began laughing harder. Charlie reacted with equal vigor and started throwing the word out in quick repeated bursts. Nash completely lost it, and started howling.
“Stop it!” Maggie yelled at him. “All you’re doing is reinforcing his behavior.”
Nash tried to stop, but it only made it worse. Maggie, not thinking that any of it was funny, whacked her husband across the shoulder and yelled, “Goddammit, Michael, this isn’t funny.”
Charlie suddenly stopped saying the word. He looked up at his mother and then his father, the dark brown orbs that dominated his eyes growing seemingly larger. He zeroed in on his mother’s less-than-happy expression, and then the bottom lip started to tremble, the big brown eyes filled with tears, and then it all came pouring out.
“No, honey,” Maggie said in a soothing voice. “Mommy and Daddy love each other.”
“Most of the time,” Nash said under his breath.
Maggie craned her head around and shot him a look that caused him to cover his groin with his dry hand. Charlie was now wailing. Maggie stroked his cheek with the back of her hand and said, “Look…Mommy and Daddy love each other. Look up here, honey.”
Maggie cupped her left hand around her husband’s neck and pulled him close. Nash kept his family jewels covered on the off chance she was luring him in for a knee to the groin. Maggie laid a big exaggerated kiss on her husband replete with sound effects. She turned back to Charlie, who was still crying, and said, “See, Mommy and Daddy love each other.” He was still crying so she went back to kissing her husband.
Nash decided she wasn’t going to hurt him, so he joined in with gusto. Ten seconds later the two were still locked in a passionate kiss that was suddenly much more than acting. Nash’s hands began to wander over his wife’s body, and he pulled her in close. Charlie slowly stopped crying, but they kept going. Maggie reached her hand down below his belt and gave him a soft squeeze.
