AllFreeNovel
Share Us
"That isn't going to happen! "
"Yes," winced Nicola with her hands over her ears. "I thought not."
"Mom?" said a voice.
Mrs. Mania's pale, skinny son, who looked about the same age as Nicola and the others, had opened his eyes and was looking around in amazement.
"How did I get tied up like this?" he said. "The last thing I remember is taking a bite of yummy sausage. I was looking forward to my next bite."
Mrs. Mania's voice and manner changed completely. It was obvious she absolutely adored her son.
"Don't be frightened, Martykins," she said. "This silly Earthling is sticking her nose into matters that don't concern her."
"Mom," said Marty, looking mortified. "Please don't call me Martykins in public." He looked around him worriedly. "Where is Princess Petronella?"
Princess Petronella lifted a languid hand from where she was sitting. "I'm over here, Marty!"
"Hi, Princess! Hi! How are you? Are you okay?" Marty's face turned pink with pleasure. It was obvious that he had something of a crush on the princess.
"So much for diplomatic visits! It looks like your friend is in cahoots with the enemy, Martyki--I mean, Martin," said Mrs. Mania. "We may have to declare war on Globagaskar next."
The United Aunts stepped forward as one and shook their fingers. "We strongly object to angry declarations of war," they chanted firmly. Nicola felt quite proud to see her great-aunt Annie chanting with the other aunts.
Mrs. Mania rolled her eyes and made a huffing sound like a bad-tempered teenager.
"Mom," said Marty. "I think you should show the United Aunts more respect."
"Oh, I do respect them, darling." Mrs. Mania grinned. "That's why I had them kidnapped. I needed them out of the way until we've won this war and Whimsy has surrendered."
"About that," said Nicola. "The people of Whimsy have a message for you."
"They've had enough and they're going to surrender, are they?"
"Not exactly," said Nicola. "May I present Henry Sweet, the president of Whimsy."
Henry stepped forward, nervously pulling off his beret, so a tuft of hair stood up like a peacock. He didn't look at all presidential.
"Not off somewhere painting a pretty picture then, Henry?" said Mrs. Mania.
"Ah, no, not right now," said Henry. He brightened. "Although I was just looking at the specks of dust dancing in the beam of light streaming through that window over there and it gave me a rather marvelous idea--"
Nicola shook her head at him. Henry coughed and cleared his throat.
"The people of Whimsy would like to challenge you to a battle to, um, end all battles." Henry carefully recited the script the Space Brigade had worked out the night before. "If you win the battle, we shall surrender. If we win the battle, you shall formally recognize Whimsy as an independent planet and immediately withdraw your troops and promise to never, ever declare war upon us again."
"You're kidding, right?" said Mrs. Mania.
"Ah, no," said Henry. "I'm perfectly serious. We propose the battle takes place at the Sublime Valley at sunset today."
"You actually think you have a chance of defeating the finest army in the galaxy! Whimsy doesn't even have an army!"
"I wouldn't say we were exactly full of confidence," admitted Henry.
Mrs. Mania laughed out loud. She shook her head almost fondly at Henry."This is exactly why you can't rule yourselves! You have no grip on reality."
"It's funny you should mention that," said Henry. "I was just thinking to myself, Could all this be a terrible dream? And yet it feels so real!"
Mrs. Mania rolled her eyes. "I suppose the Space Brigade is behind this idea of yours?" She shot Nicola a malevolent look.
