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“If there are, we don’t know about them,” Flynn said.
“Have you looked?” I asked.
“Well, no, but we haven’t even made the announcement yet.” Flynn ran a hand through his hair. An impatient gesture he’d been doing since we were children. “We’re new at this, Cym. Who knows how it will go? The last thing I need is a controversy while we’re still putting together events. Bringing women into it causes nothing but problems. We don’t need to bring women into it.”
The hair on my arms stood up. Bring women into it. As if we were the cause of all problems?
“Perhaps you should think about opening up a competition for women,” Mama said quietly. “You might be surprised by the interest.”
“Women don’t jump,” Flynn said.
“I do,” I said tightly.
“It might not be good for you,” Flynn said. “Isn’t that right, Theo? Couldn’t she damage her insides?”
“I don’t know if that makes scientific sense,” Theo said. “And might be an argument made in order to keep women out of the way.”
“Like in many other fields,” Josephine said. “Keeping us from the vote for so long was about power and control.”
“She’s not the only woman to have ever jumped.” Fiona came to stand beside my chair. “There was a woman back in 1911 who jumped twenty-two meters.” She put her hand on my shoulder. “The Flying Countess.”
“That’s correct.” Cheered by her support, I reached up to pat my sister’s hand. “Paula von Lamberg. She was in the newspaper.” They’d shown a photograph of her flying through the air, straight-backed with her skirts twirling about her legs.
Fiona and I had stared and stared at the picture of the woman who had seemed suspended in the air by magic. The image had returned to me when the boys first talked of building a ski jump. I’d told Fiona I wanted to try to fly. And fly I did.
I became obsessed. Every afternoon when I returned from whatever Poppy had needed me for, I’d gone up to the mountain. After a few weeks, I’d recruited Fiona to measure my distance. I consistently jumped forty meters but no more. It had been Fiona’s idea to have Phillip make a new pair of skis. Ones that were sleeker and slightly longer. He was gifted with woodworking and had spent hours perfecting the scope and curve.
I looked over at Flynn. “The boys at Chamonix didn’t clear fifty meters. I have.”
He stared at me. “Cym, that’s impossible.”
“It isn’t,” Fiona said. “After Phillip made her the new skis, she kept creeping up her distance until she reached fifty.”
“The skis made that much difference?” Phillip asked, clearly pleased until Flynn shot him a look.
Flynn let out a long sigh. “Are you all against me?”
“Not against you, son,” Papa said. “But we all want Cymbeline to have the chance she deserves.”
“You’re a businessman, Papa,” Flynn said. “Don’t you see how this could cause trouble for us?”
“I’m a family man first.” Papa spoke gently as he moved across the room to stand by the fire. “I’d do whatever it took to give any of you what you wanted.”
Flynn’s fury seemed to grow stronger. He turned back to me. “Why can’t you be like the other girls?”
“Why do I need to be?” If I’d been a teakettle, steam would have been coming out of my ears. “What’s wrong with the way I am? Just because I’m not some simpering damsel having babies and encouraging their husband’s careers while they’re dying inside.” The force of my anger actually made Flynn flinch.
“None of the married women in this family are dying inside,” Flynn said.
I ignored that argument, determined to get us back on the subject of the competition. “There’s no reason I shouldn’t compete. As much as I appreciate the idea of a special category for women, I don’t need one. I can beat the men.”
Flynn scooted to the edge of the couch as he muttered an expletive. The whiskey glass trembled in his hand. “We don’t want you to beat the men. Don’t you see, Cymbeline? You’ll just cause us trouble. Men won’t want to lose to a girl. This is our chance to become known and respected in the ski community—not the opportunity for you to show off.”
“Show off?” My entire body tightened with rage. This competition was being planned right here in my own town by my own brothers. For men. For men to show off and for Flynn to make more money. “How much money do you need? When will it be enough? You have to ruin our town by bringing all these strangers here and you won’t let your own sister earn what I deserve?”
“Stop. Both of you,” Mama said. “Stop before you say something you don’t mean but can’t take back.”
“What if we do mean them?” I asked Mama before whipping my head back to my brother. “You have all the power, Flynn. You get more every day. Use it for good instead of for building more wealth. Money you don’t even need.”
“It’s not my job to give you this,” Flynn said. “I have my own family to take care of instead of pandering to your outlandish wishes. You need to grow up. A perfectly wonderful man is in love with you and all you can do is think about this stupid competition.”
I gasped, mortified, then pointed a finger at Flynn. “You of all people should understand my ambition instead of trying to shame me back into place. We’ve always wanted adventure. You and me. More than any of the others. It used to be you and me daydreaming of the lives we would have. Do you remember that?”
“I’m a man, Cym. That’s how I’m supposed to be. You’re not. If I were Papa, I’d demand you stop all this foolishness and marry Viktor or be cut off financially. It’s not like anyone else would put up with you.”
“Flynn, please. Enough.” Shannon’s eyes glistened with tears. “You must stop this at once.”
Theo had left Louisa, who was now crying softly into her hands, to take his twin by the shoulders. “What’s the matter with you? This isn’t how we do it in the Barnes family. We’re a team, always.”
Flynn put up his hands as if defeated. “Fine. None of you understand.” He marched over to the liquor cabinet and poured himself another drink.
My entire body shook. Flynn, whom I’d always believed to be the most like me, had betrayed me. “I can’t believe you just said that.” My throat closed with frustration or I might have said more. Instead, I swiped away the tears that ran down my cheeks. Not like anyone else would put up with you. Was that true? Would Viktor see that now? Could it be that all this was selfish and foolish? Was I ruining my life by wanting more? I put my hand to my mouth, afraid I might be sick. My brother, for whom I’d had the utmost respect and admiration, was now betraying me? I’d thought he understood me best of all.
Jo rushed over to me and knelt next to my chair, then patted my knee. “It’s all right. You’ve nothing to be ashamed about.”
Fiona, still by my side, took her hand from my shoulder and stepped closer to Flynn. “I’ve known you to be reckless but never cruel. What’s happened to you?”
“This isn’t my fault. It’s Cym. She won’t listen to reason.” Flynn’s complexion had flushed purple, and the thick vein that ran down his neck pulsed. “She can’t change the ways of the world by sheer will.”
“Son, that’s enough,” Papa said in a voice that seemed to echo between the walls of the room.
“I think it’s time we go.” Shannon cradled her stomach and rose heavily from the couch. “Flynn, take me home, please.”
He shot me one additional loathing glance before nodding and storming out of the room.
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say.” Shannon stopped to squeeze one of my hands. “He doesn’t mean to hurt you. It’s just clumsiness on his part.”
“You don’t have to apologize,” I said. “None of this is your fault.”
“I’ll see you all next Sunday,” Shannon said.
